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"In winter why do we try to keep the house as warm as it is in summer
when we complained about the heat?" LOL
~unknown
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
"Whatever the weather hope you're all having a good Sunday!"
~Mary Lou
I'm still asking all these questions, it's been a long time now, and it's getting longer day after day, but I just can't accept what I did and even less how I did it.
Actually I really feel like I knocked myself up, everyday looks the same, each time I think I feel better, I finally feel worse, I can't go on and I still don't understand what's keeping me here.
Sometimes I just wanna run to her and explain myself to her, like, real explanations, not the shitty ones I said to her just to make her hate me and leave me alone.
But life isn't like this, and I'll probably never hear her voice again, and I miss it, how I miss it...
This place was shot in Luzern, made me think of Annecy in France, regarding the both sides of this lovely city, with ancient and new. I'll sure get back to there one day or another.
Have a nice day folks!
old watch illuminated with a flashlight.
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Why do I like fog so much? Good question. It washes out detail and gives everything a soft ghostlike quality. Hmmm, maybe that's why. It's always nice to leave a little to the imagination.
This photo was taken with the Olympus OM-D E-M1 and M.Zuiko 40-150mm f/2.8 Pro. This is not an AI generated image.
The day in question was freezing and very windy, the sun was going down fast. I shot my quickest photo shoot ever, just to get off that Siberian beach !! The dogs...well they loved it down there ? One of the shots was blown up on canvas for the dogs owner as a surprise Christmas present, which was from his understanding and patient girlfriend !
How to kill time without your phone is the question nowadays. Are we still able to slow-down and reflect?
Why do I love becoming a woman? A question I often ask myself as well as hearing from others who know of my liking to take ion a female persona. Do I regret being a man that desires to dress as a woman? Where is it all going to end up?
Questions, questions…
I accept we all have our own motivations and aspirations for expressing our desire to dress as women and which can also be a desire to inhabit a female persona. I have my personal feelings, emotional needs and ambitions for my female alter-ego which are not necessarily a reflection of how others feel about their own situation. For me, I have a need to actually pass as a woman and be perceived as being female when I cross-dress. I will admit to frustration over the years through a combination of my lack of skills in the art of male to female transformation, limits imposed by my physicality (being male) and I’m sure well meant advice telling me to forget passing and just enjoy it. To forget passing undermines everything that motivates my female side. When I become Helene I want to be a woman not simply a man dressed up. I dream of having a feminine appearance and emotionally being female rather than male. If this all sounds like serious transexual characteristics and an urgent need to start transition then let me say with utter certainty that is not what I want.
I don’t buy into the simplistic view that if you have a powerful desire to be a woman then the only answer is to transition. Nothing is that straightforward that you can boil it down to a one or the other answer. There exists a huge area of crossover. I genuinely like my male life and like being me. The idea of killing off my male self and only existing as a woman is not something I want. If I were to indulge in being simplistic, I could say I want it all, to be both a man and a woman. However, I know, especially now I am sixty years of age, how my feelings operate in terms of my transgender feelings. I can see now I have real intense moments of wanting to be female and this are all consuming when they occur. I do understand though, that these intense desires being too diminish and I am happy to return to being a man again. I would say that is reasonably creative cut as to why transitioning would not be a happy course of action for me.
I doubt I am alone in having these intense moments of wanting to be female forever but knowing they will at some point ease off. I will admit that it is these feelings that drive me to want to actually look convincingly female and to behave as a female both physically and emotionally when I transform myself from a man into a woman. It’s a fundamental part of my being and needs to be set free now and again.
In recent months my focus and aspirations for my female self has shifted towards passing myself off in a believable way as being a real woman. I find myself observing real women more and more and noting their choices in clothing, footwear and make-up. I also observe what men find attractive in women they encounter My goal is to be accomplished enough to be perceived as being a female and I too want to behave and respond as a female with any social interactions be that shopping, a polite hell, having a coffee in a cafe, visiting a gallery, having a meal and even creating some intrigue and desire with men. In short my aim for the few hours I take on my female persona I want o be able to cease being a man in every way and exist as a female.
Having outlined my feelings and aspirations does that answer any of the questions I began this narrative with? I think it partly addresses them. I do have many regrets about being a man that dresses as a woman. I kind of regret I never accepted this part of myself throughout my life. It caused me a lot of angst and made me a shy not very sociable person. I think I was far more transexual as a teenager and young man than I am now. Once I settled into a career I liked and a relationship that means more to me than my own inner desires and then had a family, everything took on a different level of contentment and also responsibility. My wife and family far outweigh my lifelong desire to become female, I would hate to cause any disruption to that. I do regret my cowardice as a young person not to act on my inner feelings in regard to desiring to be female. I chose the easy option of denial and suppression. Inevitably, I failed in that attempt at self control and had to come out as being transgender at the age of forty one. I do have regrets that certain people I came out to have used it against me, I misjudged their trust. I have regrets I don’t have breasts, a female body and look female, I dream of being feminine. Im not feminine though so this does distress me somewhat and I regret the lack of femininity.
Despite the regrets, they are not enough to crush me as I do enjoy my life, it’s an aspect I can handle, I know it is down to my own inaction that these regrets exist. I try to not let them intrude as I do enjoy my rare moments as a woman and find each opportunity incredibly rewarding and fulfilling.
Recently I was asked by a female friend where all of this was going to end up? It really made me think and I wanted to answer as honestly as I could. At the moment I think in the next few years I will start to spend time out and about as a woman not a man. This is a reflection of where I am going emotionally and also I do have personal ambitions in regard to the challenge of existing as a (part-time) woman. I want to do it well and never be considered as a man when I head out as a woman. I therefore see an increase in this kind of activity and a change in my wardrobe, hair and make-up to reflect this. I did consider what would occur if I were single. I don’t want to be single but it was a hypothetical scenario I felt I should muse over. I believe I would likely spend a lot more time as my female self if I were single but I’m pretty certain I would not transition. I still like my male self so I see such a scenario as being a less inhibited opportunity to fully express myself more freely.
It has taken me pretty much fifty years to accept myself and I don’t feel I’m still quite there yet, there is a lot more self acceptance I need to embrace. I think it’s my fear of damaging my relationship with my wife and family, who all know I have a female alter-ego, that prevents me from pushing things further. Al I can say is I do feel a lot more at ease with my inner female self than I did in past decades.
I ask a lot of questions to myself believing that the kind of questions you ask determine somehow the kind of life you lead. Perhaps it can be also true for my photographic work.
QTM n˚ 1 │ Is there a consistency in my work?
More pics in blog [mid & back] <3
Skin: LUMAE - Rhae Skin [T1] NEW!!!
Head: LeLUTKA - Avalon Head
Body: eBODY - Reborn
Boobs: eBODY REBORN - Juicy Boobs
Hair: no.match_ - No Engine [@ Uber]
Bodysuit: .:Beauty of Darkness:. CG-001 Bodysuit,
Tattoo: THIS IS WRONG - Electroclub shine+tattoo
Weapon: [REKT x TREVOR] - Swordmaster Kabuto [Check this video to see the different animations, options] NEW!!!
Boots: Diaboli Design - Solid Boots
Pose: Ana Poses - Moon
under the skies that transcend billions of universes,
the outsized elephant-room of questions & secrets;
deepak ` the lightwriter's canvas broach in open.
we read our dread, Who if I cried out would hear me?
mind the stillness-mat viz; feelings get encroached; at
first, you praise their dress, then you get ash-dressed.
'ours' keeps breaking - ourselves, within our perimeter.
bully / pulpit alters us; diminishes sickle consciousness.
betwixt the micro spaces of conversation / correctness,
a certain static silence had enshrined in - just all over.
harbinger of tenuous assumptions kept on ossifying
into the experiments with musts, doubts, turncoats.
approvers bare intimacy that bears inching eyes;
and when one is completely inside one's perfidy,
a cover-up mindset suborns a hushed horizon —
pretends - the decisions had been difficult. 'yes'
— deserts us in a forgetting curve that reminds us,
of sti-ff-ness between us, culturing the same sky.
take over air consternates us-sets dreams on fire.
formless hubris viz debris, give themselves to gust
to be e'er scattered betwixt this/that; bedraggled.
zeroing in, insecurity at the heart of human constructs
the displaced shoes let you see, the surface of yore.
a long haul to dig and find, the great heart of our past.
no spin here, to foresee, real ground under our feet.
unchopping a tree, perched on wasteland, silences..
a thousand mile stare, ensouls thousand silhouettes:
anagram—breathy.ed each other to the bridging truth;
and learnedness, endlessly multiplied with curtain call.
where e g /oquence isolates honest assessment, not
being one of their chiliad/st.ic quarters isn't isolation.
not a diminishment, if being exercised more fully -
- truth's episodic memory is tender and unwavering;
ongoing procedure of days - = - simply transformative,
to rain align, all the absorbed moments of illumination.
bathed in light, friendships bear holistic temperament
alert, alert, alter! “after the game is before the game”.
tales shine in via our window of thousand caresses,
where you are sewing a blouse that feeds the spine.
tender paws & sky-ball inside, dashing out of a conch;
over tears-coasts, the white expanse, so kind & clear.
coconut chirping an intrinsic and glorious awakening.
rose dew here, and trouble talk lies beyond the map.
the truth is made real through servitude in affection.
psithurism of intimate revelations recalls clutched keys;
the key did turn. everywhere you turn is full of wonder.
awed to see - the shift inside, shifts deep garden state!
how did a blackbird of the milky way land up here,
that joy glistens in the kaleidoscopic, tent•i•er eyes.
how else to truly trace this landscape of provenance,
a cat following a radiant butterfly to the ringing bells.
※
India ▪ that is Bhāratam
a quiet 'photo meditation' and a poem
to read in the quiet of your days.
and share as we gather around what we love.
© Think Through The — Magic Box Photographie [◎]
* The italicized line is by Rainer Maria Rilke.
The brief and questions I gave myself for this project were:
if I truly had to design my very own craft what would I want it to look like?
As a pilot, what kind of tech would I want to see in the cockpit?
What real life scenario could I incorporate making it a unique experience?
If I needed it repaired/ refueled, would I have the correct gear?
Could I build in real safety features?
What if I crashed in a remote place and needed to survive?
Can I challenge myself from a builders persepctive using parts that hardly ever come out to play?
Could I revisit my stickering techniques on such a small build?
My answers were:
I wanted something that visually had a very aerodynamic shape that looked like it was moving even when stationery, it had to have a unique "skin" that set it apart from any of my previous builds. Plus been a Starfighter, it had to be equipped with lots of weapons, that could shoot any enemy in any direction. If I wanted to be able to end a mission I could just inject and still tell the tale to my mates. My wishlist for this very personal project was, make it truly mine!
Over 80 hours of building and experimental phases was a challenge, only as its 16 x 35 studs and 9-in height, made it rather difficult to integrate not only the many play features but the final balance display stand. Ive truly enjoyed the Jam, guys you are all my hero`s, such a wonderful creative bunch. Thank you kindly to the organization of this great contest! Over &-Out
Play features on FXX (-number of features after the # )
·Front pronge shooters rotate 180° (left & right) #2
·Hidden frontend loading slot for missiles #2
· Squeeze side panels to release main missiles to fire (left and right) #2
·Open side panels to release the drop target bombs (left and right) #2
·Trigger the side decoy flares (left & right) #2
·Swivel hydrolysis pipe for regas when in servcie (left & Right) #2
·Fully opened bottom panels reveal computer charger panel and refuelling ports which are numbered from 1·3: 1) is jet fuel 2) is for hydrogen and 3) us for oxygen #5
·Removable engine covers on rear mechanism, access to batteries and cooling refuelling ports #2
·Removable quantum batteries #2
·Refuelling connection port for cooling #2
·Swivel side panel opens hatch (left):
Contains 9 items that can be removed and used: Hammer, spanner, ice hammer, screwdriver, GPS unit, emergency sky flare, galaxy neutral passport card, tablet and first aid kit #10
Swivel side panel opens hatch (right):
Contains 6 items whuch can be removed and used: main laser shotgun, Handheld tazer gun, a pack of Hero Bullets, camo face paint cream, 2 meters carbon rope, 1.5m bugee card hidden in the door #7
·Under carriage features frontend full foldable landing gear integrated into body#1
·Turn nob switch activates light inside cockpit to show pilot landing gear is activated (for real) #2
·Fold down panel fires a rear bomb disc #1
·Once pushed into full lock it automatically fires without the need to finger fire #1
·Swivel and folable landing rear gear #2
·Fully removable cockpit screen #1
·Wind screen holder for pilot entry and exit #1
·Pilot has own personal storage unit #1
·Datacard used to release Drone, which automatically falls from craft #2
·Drone folds open and has adjustable antennas #3
·Hidden side lazer guns can swivel up to 172° (left & right) #2
·Injectable pilot seat release #1
·Pilot has flying seat once fully activate folded for flight #1
·Fold down display stand #1
·Removable steering /-navigator tablet for pilot #1
· can come in/ out #1
A couple of days ago I was a question or should I say I was requested to post photos of what would be wearing over the past few days, The kind of outfits to do housework, shopping and how I would dress if I was full time.
I was going to go all practical but then decided that those photos would be contrived because that's not how I would dress for the most part. I don't do normal casual clothes all the time. Yes they have a time and a place normally down to job to undertake, environment, and lack of anything else to wear.
So this was yesterdays outfit. I did the washing and hung it out, then went into town to get my shoes re-heeled, Returned home got washing in and put it away then cooked dinner all in this outfit, So pleased I wore the sweater as it was blooming chilly.
Ok, so at least 2 characters (or so remaining) for Paradox Force/Grey Cop series. Looking for character building and matches, along with some powers/personalities/backstories etc.
The top left is unrelated to these 2, the face (left 1) is a new face for Grey Cop, while the Hydra agent's (left 2) is a torso for a supporting character for the series.
So down below the grey, slightly orange, armored torso, has 2 faces. The bearded one and a Hydra agent's face. Also missing the legs/hips. Which face is suitable for him? The bearded one is quite good in my opinion, but I was considering him for Rick Flagg, while the Hydra agent is also a good choice. This guy I came up with is a doctor, somewhat (Irish?), and also he used to be a prisoner until our heroes came to look for him, couldn't think after that.
The second one is a white torso, some black pants, pretty simple, though I could think of changing his pants for something high-tech, still in the same color. He'll be the one that uses power gauntlets. Got the brown hair and the Star Wars face for him, he kind of looks like Coulson to me, so (coincidence?!). The face on the right has 2 hair options, either a black hair or a slick brown hair also from the Hydra agent. The story of this guy is that he's an agent once, but works on his own, is good at tech and stuff, secretly good at knives. His identity is pretty mysterious as no one knows his first name, but only his last, so needing options here.
I've tried many combos, but some work and some don't, still in between the line of making and finalising the product.
Comment below for suggestions, just come up with what you can.
Question is what does one wear to drop a CV of for a possible job?
Always a hard one that, especially as i was going to the tip afterwards. so, casual , professional or just smart. and do i remove my earrings and nail polish?
No doubt i will decide at some point
Good morning everyone and I hope you had a nice weekend. As the the title indicates, presented today are my first pics of a Question Mark (Polygonia interrogationis). I know, kind of late in the season, but unlike the Eastern Comma, Autumn is usually my best chance to photograph one of these.
Seen here is what is known as the winter form as evident by the orange hind wings, which in the summer form are dark. Almost black.
Just three pics, of which the other two can be found in the comment section and my stream. Both are lateral shots of which one was taken using the flash. Something I rarely ever do for fear of hurting the butterfly, but did in this case only because of the long distance between me and the butterfly, and it was perched in heavy shade at the time. Otherwise I don't recommend using a flash when photographing butterflies, or any insect. Especially if you're very close.
Thank you for stopping by...and I hope you have a truly great day and week. And Happy Columbus Day to those of you living in the United States.
Lacey
ISO400, aperture f/8, exposure .002 seconds (1/500) focal length 300mm
Seemed appropriate! :)
Taken for the Jules' Photo Challenge Group:
March 14, 2023
International Ask a Question Day
The June issue of my journal, The Question Mark, explores this question at questioning.org/Jun2023/home.html
The photo above, probably taken by my father, showed the home where I spent my early days, enjoying swimming, fishing and water skiing on the waters of Greenwich Cove.
I no longer think of this as home, as I have wandered hither and yon with my three cats, and have come to understand how we might create home wherever we live.
And sometimes, when romance is especially warm, we might feel most at home in our lover's arms, as expressed in the poem below.
Next to you
Lying next to you
I melt
Softened by your heat
I am butter soaking into toast
I am man loving woman
I am sun sinking into ocean
A sky ablaze with rose-tinted light
Waking next to you
I linger
Savoring your touch
Your scent
Your gentle breathing
In and out
At home in my arms
Sleeping the deep sleep
Living next to you
My palette is more vivid
My palate more complex
Life is shining and exuberant
Time slowed
Rhythm quickened
Pulse intense
Writing next to you
My words flow like a swollen river
Poem after poem after poem
As love and passion press me like a lemon
And juice pours out
Lyrically
While I surrender
Thankfully
© Jamie McKenzie, all rights reserved
You will find more of my poems and songs here
and in The Storm in Its Passing and Flights of Fancy.
My songs are at
I hope you have the holiday season related to YOUR taste - mine is to make music: visit my blog at flickrcomments.wordpress.com/2013/12/24/radio-days/
Who will sit here?
What is the purpose of having a chair outside the store?
Why is an empty chair so appealing to a photographer?
These are questions about an empty chair. How about questions about photography?
What would you do to create a new vision (having new light in my words) for your photography?
- use a new camera, new lens or any piece of new gear?
- learn new photo editing software or new digital darkroom techniques?
- read a book by photography master?
- shooting the same subject again and again without doing anything else?
- anything else you may suggest?
Have a great Tuesday!
This is just an empty chair outside a store in Steveston Village.
MARVEL_DOLLS and I are happy to announce the A-Z Doll Photography Challenge will return in just a few days. We hope you're as excited as we are!
Photo themes will be posted to Audra's (MARVEL_DOLLS) account and the photo group page, so be sure to watch for a post with descriptions of A, B and C in February.
Your opinions are important to the success of the group, so please take a moment to answer Yes or No to two questions:
1) This group had featured a voting process, much like the Blonde Bombshell group. Would you like to continue monthly nominations and voting to recognize your favorite photos for the themes? (Yes or no)
2) Would you like to be tagged to each photo announcing monthly themes and possible voting announcements?
(A "no" vote means you will not see notices about the group on your "Recent Activity" feed on flickr or receive an email notification depending on your settings.)
What won't change: Anyone can vote, and anyone is invited to participate with any fashion doll. The themes are broad frameworks to stimulate creativity, and most importantly, participation is fluid, so come and go as your schedule and creativity allows.
If you haven't yet joined our photo group page, you can do so here: www.flickr.com/groups/2962397@N20/
We look forward to your feedback and hope you're ready for a new year of fun!