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For most of my life the gym was my sanctuary, my escape, my addiction, my strength, my weakness...my prison.
As a young child I would find refuge in a book. Whenever I began to notice being different and feeling confused about my gender, I would turn to a book, always reading. As I grew into a teenager and understood my dilemma of being transgender, I was determined to fight it. I purchased a weight set and bench without my parents knowing. When it arrived, my Dad asked “Where are you going to put it?” We lived in a small house and space was a luxury. He then said jokingly, “What are you going to do? Take out your bed?”. Thankful for his suggestion, I said, “That’s exactly what I am going to do.” The fight was on.
Within a year, I was a new person. Suddenly, the nerdy guy who liked to read was now the muscular dude. I was accepted by all everywhere but, secretly, I was fighting a losing battle and thus the love/hate relationship began. I would work so hard to win the public’s opinion and loathe what I would see in the mirror. I was in constant battle with myself. When pondering transitioning, I hated what I saw in the mirror, what I had done. All those muscles were my battle scars. Years of fighting against who I was. I’m glad that the war is over and I have finally won.
With that said, the gym is a part of my life, it always will be. I enjoy going now and look forward to starting each morning there...it’s my cup of coffee, so to speak. Now I strive to find the balance that will produce a healthy, fit and feminine appearance.
This is the shot I was working when I took a photo of my tripod with the backpack hanging off it. I thought that a monochrome treatment would work well here. I like the log, too.
A secret treasure chest may contain gold, but finding hidden light is the real magic ~ KissThePixel2019
Between dodging afternoon thunderstorms and the crowds at the Aspen Film Fest, I was able to enjoy a serene moment with my dear old friend...more to come...
One of my favorite places, so peaceful and beautiful.
John Denver Sanctuary and Song Garden. Aspen, Colorado
While we were forced out of our home we decided to make the best of it and took a little Disney vacation. Topher had a BLAST!! This was a shot from the new Finding Nemo ride...As you can see...he was very impressed.
San Diego Pregnancy, Maternity, Newborn Baby, Child & Family Photography
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When someone is seeking ... it happens quite easily that he only sees the thing that he is seeking; that he is unable to find anything, unable to absorb anything ... because he is obsessed with his goal. Seeking means: to have a goal; but finding means: to be free, to be receptive, to have no goal. HERMANN HESSE, Siddhartha
One never reaches home, but wherever friendly paths intersect the whole world looks like home for a time. HERMANN HESSE, Demian
Music to enhance this: Miss Sarajevo amazingly beautiful song.
Dear Clarice,
In a garden of the house.
What are u finding for?
Shelly x Clarice
(a letter from ... )
Plz browse in the largest size.*
self-portrait
I came across this graffiti while I was perusing Greenpoint Brooklyn; a great place for photography.
Estrella was having a wonderful time exploring and enjoying all the pretty flowers in this strange new world.
I am finding it impossible to decide on Hawk IDs!!! I have put two different photos of an individual on Google Lens. One photo is identified as a Swainson's and the other as a Red-tailed, sigh. Thanks to friends, Sandi and Jackie, it turned out to be a juvenile Swainson's Hawk. The hawk in the photo above is of the adult that I saw first, along this gravel road. She flew off after a short while and I didn't think anything of it. However, when I came back in the opposite direction on this road, I glanced at the spot I had seen her, and there, to my surprise, were two juvenile siblings tucked into the corner of the field by the fence.
Further on, another two siblings were seen and judging by their behaviour, they would seem to be Swainson's Hawks. While driving along a back road after another visit to the Saskatoon Farm (previous visit was on 13 September 2024), I spotted a hawk down on the gravel road way ahead of my car. Pulling forward very slowly and cautiously, I took a few ID shots. My first thought was that perhaps it was injured, as I never see a hawk down on the road and I definitely didn't want to risk making it fly. Then I looked through the windscreen and was surprised to see a second hawk on the road! Passing the first hawk, I pulled over to watch the second bird. After a little while, this second hawk 'flew' for a second, barely above the ground. Then it walked to my car and stayed there. It did give one quick call to an unseen adult, but I didn't hear any answer. I can't imagine Red-tailed hawks doing this, as they tend to fly away almost as soon as they see my car.
Shortly before this experience, I had seen an adult hawk on a fence post but only managed a few quick ID shots before it flew. This was about an 11 minutes' slow drive further south on the same road. Driving past the spot in the other direction some time later, i glanced at the corner of the field where I had seen the adult hawk fly from, and there, down on the ground, were two young hawks. I don't know if these youngsters could be the same ones I saw further north or not. I wonder if their flying skills would be good enough to fly that distance.
"Breeding densities may vary from one area to the next but averages one pair per 2.5 sq mi (6.5 km2). The average home range estimate for this hawk is 1 to 2 sq mi (2.6 to 5.2 km2)."
From Wikipedia.
First thing in the morning on this day, 16 September 2024, I made a return visit to the Saskatoon Farm. They had just had a busy, special weekend at the Farm and I wanted to see and take photos of some of the pumpkin displays that were not out on 13 September. I always like to support the Farm, so I enjoyed a breakfast that I knew would keep me going for a few hours.
Very little in the way of birds to be seen on this drive, though I did see several other hawks. Birding has definitely slowed down - can't wait for next spring!
Beauty is hidden.
You must seek it out,
It may not always be in front of you
Take it where you can.
ISO 800 | 90mm | f5 | 1/100sec
Cobweb, private property, Armidale.
Bet you didn't expect this to come from me.. but im getting back into the macro again... winter brings it all out.
I love to come across unexpected pleasures. Finding these flowers was unexpected and a pleasure. We were crossing over a walkway above the road in San Francisco, California. I was tired from walking several hours and then found these beautiful dahlias that were so much fun to photograph. The cross process treatment I used seems to bring out the pattern on the petals. It gives a retro feel also.
...in all the likely places! (Hope Valley, near Lake Tahoe, Northern California)
I decided to cancel my Saturday plans and head on a photo-roadtrip into the Sierra Nevada instead (after watching a weather front move through Northern California)...I didn't leave as early as I had hoped for and didn't know exactly where I needed to go, but it was really fun exploring and finding both fall colors and a bunch of snow before it all melted away (and before the leaves turn black or fall to the ground)! :-) ....
To view on black, please click here
To find the way, close your eyes, listen closely, and attend with your heart.
Anonymous
thank you explore :)
Olivia has lost her way but thankfully she ran into the friendly Guardian Spirit of the meadows who offers to take her back to her friends
Too many reminders of our fragile existence lately... Sometimes it is too much to grasp or to understand, making life feel like a surreal form or reality.
Hold those you love close to your heart and never forget to tell them how much you love them. That is really all that we can do.
Hi, my name is Tafida Rahman Khan Yusra. And I'm her niece. Anyways you have seen me here, here, here, here, here, here, here and finally here before. And yes you have guessed it right from the very day i was born this 7D was always after me, thanks to my aunt. However i'm equally self obsessed as my aunt and love myself a lot. These days as i am growing up i don't mind posing infront of the camera. Like always my aunt was following me around today and she managed to capture me while i was enjoying my mirror reflection. Anyways the reason i am writing to all of you today is because tomorrow is my first birthday, i hope all of you will shower me with blessings. Please pray that i grow up healthy and prosperously and find myself having an identity of my own (:
Oh and শুভ নববর্ষ ১৪১৯ (Happy Bengali New Year)
from a new series, finding horizons | I am posting all 22 images in chronological order and several may be reposts as this is a work in progress.
So alot of stuff has happend in my life the last several days.
I'm sick, my head feels like exploding, I can't breathe becase of my nose, and my throat is like a sawing machine..
Our school got bomb threatened last week so I've been scared to go to school, someone is sending me hurtfull messages on my kik and stuff. So lately I've didn't have time to spending time with the dolls, but the hurtfull messages stopped, I ignored it and didn't care. I am trying to convince me that it's not dangerous to go to school and I'm trying to get well as soon as possible. ^^
So this is a pic of one of my newest dolls, her name is Cao Lu (got it from a member from the kpop group FIESTAR)
Her outfit is gorgeous! I'm sooo happy that I got that Stylin friends 2 pack! That shirt with a nice necklace is so cool together, and with a red beanie and some chic sunglasses, her outfit is perfect.
Feels good to be back for real now! =)
from a new series, finding horizons | I am posting all 22 images in chronological order and several may be reposts as this is a work in progress.
I took this shot a couple of years ago at Joshua Tree National Monument. I was scouring through my image library looking for shot of a climber that I had taken and saw this one. It was kinda like finding a 20 dollar bill in your pants pocket while your doing laundry :)
Please leave a comment if you like this photo. It's the easiest way for me to interact with my contacts and respond by visiting your stream. If you have any questions about this photo or about photography in general, I will do my best to help, just post a comment or send me a Flickr mail and I will respond as quickly as possible.
For those of you new to photography, I would like to provide you with some very helpful videos that will help you get more from your photography. They were very useful to me while I was learning and I hope that they will help you out as well. Just click the link below and on the left side column there are pre-made playlists on everything you could ever want to know about photography. I hope you enjoy them and as always my friends "Happy Shooting"
www.youtube.com/channel/UCy6WmwikGospj_jgj5KQzLQ
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