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Deze droom is kort, krachtig en symbolisch voor wat er op dit moment gebeurt. Ik heb onlangs een ingrijpende beslissing genomen, die waarschijnlijk op veel vlakken verandering gaat brengen. Het voelde als nodig om verder te reizen en verder in mijn natuurlijke energie, kracht en eigenheid te komen. Moeder Ayahuasca heeft me dit inzicht geschonken en me laten voelen dat ik er klaar voor ben. Want het betekent ook dat een oude onzekerheid weer de kop op kan steken en mijn 'aangezicht' misschien letterlijk wordt aangetast. Ik hoop dat ik nu sterk genoeg ben om hiermee om te gaan en dat de rijkdom die ik van binnen voel de oude behoefte aan bevestiging vanuit de buitenwereld heeft opgelost.
Pijlen als wapen staan symbool voor macht, energie en deskundigheid. De rode kleur versterkt dit (en symboliseert kracht, energie, leven, seksualiteit/vruchtbaarheid en macht). De schijnbare dood door de pijl betekent het einde van de veiligheid van mijn oude ik en de bevestiging van het uitkomen van mijn grootste angst: ik verlies mijn aangezicht. Maar er is een werkelijkheid voorbij die angst: er komen energie, kracht, leven en ‘macht/heerschappij' voor in de plaats. De pijl gaat door alle uiterlijkheden, rechtstreeks naar de bron: mijn derde oog. En dat is de energie die zich op dit moment met een enorme snelheid en intensiteit aan het ontwikkelen is (en me heeft aangezet tot en gesteund in deze beslissing).
Het doet me denken aan een periode eerder in mijn leven, toen ik vocht tegen mezelf door te hongeren. Ik kon mijn eetprobleem pas echt oplossen, toen mijn grootste angst werkelijkheid werd en ik mezelf niet langer onderdrukte, gewoon maar begon te eten en inderdaad kilo’s aankwam. Ik vond het verschrikkelijk, maar in de vrijkomende energie die onder al die onderdrukking en inperking gezeten had, begon ik ook anders naar mezelf te kijken en mezelf meer te accepteren. De strijd verdween en daardoor uiteindelijk ook de kilo’s. De beslissing van nu maakt misschien een (oude?) angst werkelijkheid, maar daar staat de transformerende kracht en rijkdom van het nu tegenover.
Pijlen symboliseren ook een bewustzijn van (eigen) handelingen die niet ongedaan gemaakt kunnen worden, en dat is hoe deze beslissing voelt: ik ben klaar voor (het kán niet anders) en me bewust van de mogelijke gevolgen. De schutter laat haar pijl precies op de juiste plek terechtkomen; gevoelsmatig zijn er op dit moment het bewustzijn, het draagvlak en de deskundigheid om deze overgang te kunnen maken.
De sfeer van de schare mensen achter me in de droom, doet me aan Jezus denken. Ik sta voor het wateroppervlak: symbool voor gevoelens en de rijke schatten van het onderbewuste. Ik loop niet over het water - los van gevoelens en intuïtie - maar door het water. Bij het watergraf voorkomt de water-/draagkracht dat ik naar de bodem zak. En dan realiseer ik me dat ik nog leef. Omringd door en verbonden met een magische water- en binnenwereld. Deze poel van onderbewuste krachten is de ingang naar het leven en dit inzicht bracht als vanzelf de Grote Beslissing met zich mee.
Na meer dan twintig jaar ben ik gestopt met de inmiddels omstreden Diane 35-pil - en dus met het onderdrukken van mijn natuurlijke hormoonbalans en vrouw-zijn. Wat er nu gaat gebeuren weet ik niet, maar het voelt alsof ik weer een jas heb uitgetrokken waarvan ik niet doorhad dat ik hem droeg. Ik voel me lichter en ga door lagen, kleurschakeringen en sferen waarvan ik niet wist dat ze bestonden. Er is meer energie en minder verdoving. Het was niet the blue, maar the yellow pill en die is blijkbaar nog een graadje erger. Het venijn zit hem in de vanzelfsprekendheid en algemene acceptatie van wat ‘normaal’ is. En zo is de anticonceptiepil misschien wel één van de slimste trucjes van de Matrix (en het onderdrukken van vrouwelijke kracht en energie).
The red pill en 'rode' thee luidden de rode pijl in en wie weet hoeveel blosjes en hartstochten er nog volgen. Dankbaar voor de liefdevolle, vurige en kleurige pijlen van Mamayahuasca ♡
images of my new Rode VideoMic Me microphone
Additional items
Iphone 6
GoPro 3way Selfie stick
shop.gopro.com/mounts/3-way/AFAEM-001.html#/start=1
Square jellyfish smartphone tripod mount
www.squarejellyfish.com/spring-tripod-mount.html
Monopod Tripod Mount Adapter 1/4'' Screw Thread For GoPro
Visitor information and opening times: www.rodehall.co.uk/
Rode Hall, a Georgian country house, is the seat of the Wilbraham family, members of the landed gentry in the parish of Odd Rode, Cheshire, England. The estate, with the original timber-framed manor house, was purchased by the Wilbrahams from the ancient Rode family in 1669. The medieval manor house was replaced between 1700 and 1708 by a brick-built seven-bay building; a second building, with five bays, was built in 1752; the two buildings being joined together in 1800 to form the present Rode Hall.
The house is Grade II* listed, and is surrounded by parkland and formal gardens, which are included as Grade II on the National Register of Historic Parks and Gardens. On the site are a grotto, an ice house, and an ornamental obelisk, all Grade II listed structures. Rode Hall is still owned and occupied by the Wilbrahams, currently by the 8th Baronet, Sir Richard Baker Wilbraham, and his wife, Lady Anne Baker Wilbraham. The hall and gardens are open to the public from April to September.
Taken from: en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Rode_Hall
Abbess Roding, Essex
On the north wall of the nave ia a large tablet to the memory of Sir Gamaliel Capel, being figures of himself and his wife kneeling at a prayer desk. Below them also kneeling are the effigies of their nine children. Inscribed on it are the words "Here lleth Sir Gamaliel, knoght, son of Henry Capel Esq., and Lady Katherine, daughter of the Earl of Rutland. He marryed Jane one of the daughters of Weston Brown Esq., by whome he had six sonnes viz:-Gamaliel, knight, Thomas, Anthony, Henry, Theodosius and Francis, and three daughters - Mary, Anne and Mildred-Ob. A.D.1627 aet fuae 50".
"We bragge no vertures, and we begge no teares.
O, Header, if thou hast eyes and ears
It Is enough; but tell me why
Thou comst to gaze? Is It to pry
Into our cost? or borrowe
A copie of our sorrowe?
Or dost thou come
To learn to dye,
Not knowing whome
To practice by?
If this be thy desire.
Remove thee one step nigher,
Here lies a President; a rarer
Earth never showed, nor heaven a fayrer.
She was... but rooms denyes to tell the what.
Summe all perfections uppe, and she was that".
images of my new Rode VideoMic Me microphone
Additional items
Iphone 6
GoPro 3way Selfie stick
shop.gopro.com/mounts/3-way/AFAEM-001.html#/start=1
Square jellyfish smartphone tripod mount
www.squarejellyfish.com/spring-tripod-mount.html
Monopod Tripod Mount Adapter 1/4'' Screw Thread For GoPro
Jane Woods, Bob Woods
If you'd like any prints please contact me at info@nicbezzina.com
Best efforts have been made to get everyone's name correct.
If any name's are incorrect, misspelt, or missing feel free to contact me with the image title so i can correct it.
Abbess Roding, Essex
On the north wall of the nave is a large tablet to the memory of Sir Gamaliel Capel, being figures of himself and his wife kneeling at a prayer desk. Below them also kneeling are the effigies of their nine children. Inscribed on it are the words "Here lleth Sir Gamaliel, knoght, son of Henry Capel Esq., and Lady Katherine, daughter of the Earl of Rutland. He marryed Jane one of the daughters of Weston Brown Esq., by whome he had six sonnes viz:-Gamaliel, knight, Thomas, Anthony, Henry, Theodosius and Francis, and three daughters - Mary, Anne and Mildred-Ob. A.D.1613 aet fuae 50".
"We bragge no vertures, and we begge no teares.
O, Header, if thou hast eyes and ears
It Is enough; but tell me why
Thou comst to gaze? Is It to pry
Into our cost? or borrowe
A copie of our sorrowe?
Or dost thou come
To learn to dye,
Not knowing whome
To practice by?
If this be thy desire.
Remove thee one step nigher,
Here lies a President; a rarer
Earth never showed, nor heaven a fayrer.
She was... but rooms denyes to tell the what.
Summe all perfections uppe, and she was that".
19 de septiembre ..
rodeo de chile
ñuñoa
estadio nacional
chile
fiestas patrias y celebracion del cumpleaños de mi madre
St Mary, Aythorpe Roding, Essex
It was May 2014, the most beautiful spring of the century. I had taken my bike on the train from Ipswich to Bishops Stortford before heading off away from the hell of Stansted airport into the wilds of Essex. Now I veered eastwards from the forest, entering the emptiest and most remote area of the county. No villages for miles, just hamlets, fields and the occasional farmstead. The road to my next target would have meant a five mile ride, but I spotted a half-mile bridleway, of which there are lots in this part of Essex. It would cut three miles off the journey, so I took it. It was a farm track, deeply rutted, and it took me down the side of a barley field to copses in the distance, the hysterical yellow of acres of rapeseed in full flower beyond.
At first, it was just about cycleable, but then it wasn't, so I pushed my bike for about ten minutes or so. As I approached the country lane at the far end of it I thought there seemed something vaguely familiar about it, and then I realised what it was. Ah, I thought to myself, I'm entering East Anglia again. Now I was on hedged lanes through rolling fields of barley and rapeseed. Profound green, intense yellow. The road climbed, and over the rise I saw a spire. I headed down a track for half a mile or so and came to one of the most remote churches in all Essex.
It was locked, there was no keyholder notice. An inexpressibly lonely place. The church itself is a poor little thing, its wooden spire shot through with woodpecker holes. There were no notices of service in the porch, and so I expect it has fallen into disuse. Redundancy beckons, and perhaps it will be left to go quietly back to nature. It might just as well be left open, in which case it would at least serve some purpose to passing walkers, pilgrims and strangers.
And yet there was something very special about just standing in the churchyard, in the silence. It felt like nothing had happened here for a very long time. I looked down at the inscription on a memorial cross to Our Dear Son, Bertie George Emberson, who died at the Military Hospital, Caterham, Surrey, September 7th 1918 aged 19 years. How awful. And yet, I thought, the churchyard they stood in to watch him put into the earth has not changed. The one they knew is the one there now.
Simon Knott, April 2018
Abbess Roding, Essex
On the north wall of the nave ia a large tablet to the memory of Sir Gamaliel Capel, being figures of himself and his wife kneeling at a prayer desk. Below them also kneeling are the effigies of their nine children. Inscribed on it are the words "Here lleth Sir Gamaliel, knoght, son of Henry Capel Esq., and Lady Katherine, daughter of the Earl of Rutland. He marryed Jane one of the daughters of Weston Brown Esq., by whome he had six sonnes viz:-Gamaliel, knight, Thomas, Anthony, Henry, Theodosius and Francis, and three daughters - Mary, Anne and Mildred-Ob. A.D.1627 aet fuae 50".
"We bragge no vertures, and we begge no teares.
O, Header, if thou hast eyes and ears
It Is enough; but tell me why
Thou comst to gaze? Is It to pry
Into our cost? or borrowe
A copie of our sorrowe?
Or dost thou come
To learn to dye,
Not knowing whome
To practice by?
If this be thy desire.
Remove thee one step nigher,
Here lies a President; a rarer
Earth never showed, nor heaven a fayrer.
She was... but rooms denyes to tell the what.
Summe all perfections uppe, and she was that".
Visitor information and opening times: www.rodehall.co.uk/
Rode Hall, a Georgian country house, is the seat of the Wilbraham family, members of the landed gentry in the parish of Odd Rode, Cheshire, England. The estate, with the original timber-framed manor house, was purchased by the Wilbrahams from the ancient Rode family in 1669. The medieval manor house was replaced between 1700 and 1708 by a brick-built seven-bay building; a second building, with five bays, was built in 1752; the two buildings being joined together in 1800 to form the present Rode Hall.
The house is Grade II* listed, and is surrounded by parkland and formal gardens, which are included as Grade II on the National Register of Historic Parks and Gardens. On the site are a grotto, an ice house, and an ornamental obelisk, all Grade II listed structures. Rode Hall is still owned and occupied by the Wilbrahams, currently by the 8th Baronet, Sir Richard Baker Wilbraham, and his wife, Lady Anne Baker Wilbraham. The hall and gardens are open to the public from April to September.
Taken from: en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Rode_Hall
Engine : BMW
2.979 cc
6 Cylinder
360 PS @ 6.000 rpm
500 Nm @ 1.300-4.500 rpm
Vmax : + 275 km/h
0-100 km/h : 3,5 sec
1.090 kg
Essen Motorshow 2014
Essen - Germany
December 2014
Abbess Roding, Essex
On the north wall of the nave ia a large tablet to the memory of Sir Gamaliel Capel, being figures of himself and his wife kneeling at a prayer desk. Below them also kneeling are the effigies of their nine children. Inscribed on it are the words "Here lleth Sir Gamaliel, knoght, son of Henry Capel Esq., and Lady Katherine, daughter of the Earl of Rutland. He marryed Jane one of the daughters of Weston Brown Esq., by whome he had six sonnes viz:-Gamaliel, knight, Thomas, Anthony, Henry, Theodosius and Francis, and three daughters - Mary, Anne and Mildred-Ob. A.D.1627 aet fuae 50".
"We bragge no vertures, and we begge no teares.
O, Header, if thou hast eyes and ears
It Is enough; but tell me why
Thou comst to gaze? Is It to pry
Into our cost? or borrowe
A copie of our sorrowe?
Or dost thou come
To learn to dye,
Not knowing whome
To practice by?
If this be thy desire.
Remove thee one step nigher,
Here lies a President; a rarer
Earth never showed, nor heaven a fayrer.
She was... but rooms denyes to tell the what.
Summe all perfections uppe, and she was that".
Door Ria Brasser, Oost Souburg
Vlissingen 23-11-2016 Een fraaie rode zonsondergang boven de Skyline van Vlissingen( 22-11-2016(16.57)
Abbess Roding, Essex
On the north wall of the nave ia a large tablet to the memory of Sir Gamaliel Capel, being figures of himself and his wife kneeling at a prayer desk. Below them also kneeling are the effigies of their nine children. Inscribed on it are the words "Here lleth Sir Gamaliel, knoght, son of Henry Capel Esq., and Lady Katherine, daughter of the Earl of Rutland. He marryed Jane one of the daughters of Weston Brown Esq., by whome he had six sonnes viz:-Gamaliel, knight, Thomas, Anthony, Henry, Theodosius and Francis, and three daughters - Mary, Anne and Mildred-Ob. A.D.1627 aet fuae 50".
"We bragge no vertures, and we begge no teares.
O, Header, if thou hast eyes and ears
It Is enough; but tell me why
Thou comst to gaze? Is It to pry
Into our cost? or borrowe
A copie of our sorrowe?
Or dost thou come
To learn to dye,
Not knowing whome
To practice by?
If this be thy desire.
Remove thee one step nigher,
Here lies a President; a rarer
Earth never showed, nor heaven a fayrer.
She was... but rooms denyes to tell the what.
Summe all perfections uppe, and she was that".