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I do love to try and be a woman when possible. I know I'm a transvestite but I do have a deep desire to be female lurking within me. As a young man I yearned to be a female and despite settling into my male life that dream surfaces on occasion, often without warning.
I am now content with my male life but do need my moments of release when I can try to be a woman. If I was honest I d feel more comfortable as a woman and I enjoy trying to make myself feminine. I do not succeed as it is difficult to escape one's male body and all that goes with being a man but I am keen on occasion to try and escape my physical gender.
I often wish I had a female body, to be smooth and hairless with soft skin and at times my dismay at not having breasts or female curves can cause me some emotional pain. All I can do is engage in impersonating the female gender and I do rather enjoy this performance challenge and the effort that goes into to trying to feminise my male body.
I absolutely love shaving my legs, chest and arms. I enjoy plucking my eyebrows and I am always excited and thrilled to apply make-up to my face and don a wig. Cross-dressing s a rather fabulous pastime and I am delighted to be a transvestite despite some of the aspects that cause me concern and angst. It is more of a positive experience than a negative one.
I took this self portrait in a rather daring (well for me) session where I attempted to try and look female by only wearing make-up and a wig and shaving my body. I posed completely nude and experienced a liberation I had never known. Of course am not going to post any naked images but it was as close as I've ever felt to being a woman.
The excitement was tempered by the reality of not having those breasts I so dream of and knowing that my male genitals were still present despite being tucked and taped. It's interesting how as men we are affected by our genitals and yet when I cross-dress I am always keen to lose them...not very manly but then I am trying to be a woman. It used to worry me the way I was keen to ditch my masculine self and genuinely want to be rid of it as I transformed myself into a woman. For a few hours I have no desire whatsoever to be male and adore the role of a female. I am aware though I'm just acting and engaging in illusion and that does hold great appeal to me as I do know that part of the thrill of trying to be a woman is knowing I am really a man!
I'm full of conflicting desires, gender confusion and a wish to be a bit of a performer. I love the idea of being a man that plays a role as a woman. All I know for certain is I love to dress up as a woman.
Helene x
This part of a sculpture at DeCordova Museum and Sculpture Park, "Crazy Spheroid—Two Entrances," by Dan Graham. This is from the museum's website:
Crazy Spheroid—Two Entrances is a structure in the shape of a half-circle, built of two-way mirrored glass and steel. Visitors standing within or outside of this sculpture observe contorted reflections of themselves and the surrounding Park grounds, and become aware of their own acts of looking. Based on his interest in architecture and its psychological effects, Dan Graham began creating these “pavilions”, as he calls them, in the 1970s. He notes that in all of his art, “geometric forms inhabited and activated by the presence of the viewer, [produce] a sense of uneasiness and psychological alienation through a constant play between feelings of inclusion and exclusion.”
The title says it all...plus there are 4-6 actual reflections in the water droplets. Taken in my yard while trying to familiarize myself with my new camera a Canon 50D. After 3 1/2 years of hard use my 20D had its first serious problem a shutter issue and is being repaired the problem is....i am leaving on a trip next week and had to have something to take. I had hoped to hold out until i could afford a 5D mk II.....but the 50D is a nice camera and hopefully my 20D will be able to be used as a secondary camera.
strobist: one sb800 into a white umbrella high camera right, white reflector in my hands at chest level.
“Self-reverence, self-knowledge, self-control,- These three alone lead life to sovereign power.” - Lord Alfred Tennyson
Note:
Roney is one among 15.000 lost children still roaming the streets of São Paulo.
It is in deepest regret and sadness that I inform you of Roney's cold-blooded murder on the early morning hours of January 15th. May he find peace wherever his journey has taken him.......
IMPORTANT NOTE:
On June 27th. we also lost our beloved Claudiney.
Shot this image during an interview with Croyds, check it out!
www.youtube.com/watch?v=H_ktjHO2ICI&feature=youtu.be
Message me on Facebook, or email me at seanmundyphoto@gmail.com if you're interested in purchasing prints
Self Portrait Piece
Hand crocheted fine silver bag
Glass vials, Sterling stopper tops
Hair and Iguana scales
Taken in one of the windows of my home. I really enjoy how this looks and how colorful and clear it is for a window, it's almost mirror like. I feel like my taste, art, and perception are changing. I hope anyone viewing my photography enjoys my new various work yet to come! Working hard!
After some time, I decided to take a selfportrait again, so if you like or not and if you want to leave a comment, feel free... it'd be nice to hear from you.
Here you find some information about the behind the scenes, as usual.
camera info: Canon XTi | 50mm(ƒ/1.4) USM | ƒ/1.8 | ISO 100 | 1/80s | 50mm
strobist info: Vivitar 285HV @1/16 with 1/2 CTO through a white umbrella as main light, camera left and 580EX II with snoot as a second light, camera right.