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The school office in an abandoned school.
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Kathmandu, Nepal.
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EXPLORE # 324 14.11.09
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Please, don't use this image on blogs or web site without my permission.
This image is protected by copyright. Please do not copy or reproduce this image in print or anywhere on the internet without my direct permission. If you would like to use this, or any of my photos, please just send me a Flickr email and ask.
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Part of seawall at Baker Beach, Sausalito, Marin County, Northern California, USA.
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Happy Bench Monday!
The trees have been decorated with lights for the Halloween events at the Gardens. : )
Pick the day. Enjoy it - to the hilt. The day as it comes. People as they come... The past, I think, has helped me appreciate the present - and I don't want to spoil any of it by fretting about the future. Explore #307. Sept 10th 2009.
Audrey Hepburn
Amsterdam - Hemonylaan
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Meds Please!
Morning all, I have been unable to post on Flickr for almost 2 weeks. This is probably going to be a long post, but bear with me.
3 weeks ago I rang a legitimate book agent who wanted to publish my life story, she told me it would sell all around the world and probably be a movie. Unfortunately, I don’t have the attention span or time to write it, so I would need a ghost writer.
Because I will be running market stalls regularly, selling my photo products, I reckon in a few months I can probably manage to pay the fees for the ghost writer. This spurred me on to work hard and I have invested in enough products to sell, and hoping in a few months I can manage to rent a shop in Durham which saves me trailing to markets with my stock all the time.
On the 6th of November, my mental health worker visited me and she had brought a social worker with her. In my excitement, I had messaged her and told her what the agent had told me.
So, long story short, she decided that I was delusional and needed to go into hospital, I was horrified, they wouldn’t even look at the emails that I had been sent from the agent and they could see all the stock that was filling my living room after spending most of my savings on it, knowing I would more than get my money back.
My brother came over also. I was absolutely outraged and frustrated that they didn’t believe me, so in anger I ran out of the house to get away. Because of this, they rang the police who took me to hospital in a police van, where I was assessed, thinking they would look at my evidence, but they didn’t, and I was admitted into a women’s mental hospital.
I won’t go into much detail as I my fingers are aching 😂 so to cut it short, it was the right thing to do, as it turns out I have stage 1 bipolar (severe) and because of the excitement of getting a book deal, I became manic. I was in shock to find out but it made sense because both my parents and my brother had bipolar.
I was really upset to realise that this could’ve been diagnosed much sooner but I was given a diagnosis of borderline personality disorder.
If only somebody had thought to test me for it, rather than diagnose me with BPD and depression and anxiety. I have been suffering with my mental health for most of my life and an earlier diagnosis, it would’ve meant things that would’ve been better for me and Antonio instead I was given the wrong diagnosis and recently I started taking antidepressants which were the reason why I became so manic, because they because they were not good for people with bipolar and can make you manic.
Hence why I was in hospital. I was taken off the antidepressants and put on a mood stabiliser within a few days. I felt better I felt like I could cope and I even felt like more confident. It took me 11 days before I was finally allowed to go home. I had to go for a tribunal and in the hospital and I smashed it (I was brilliant and did better than my solicitor)because I had to get back to Antonio as I was worried about him so much.
My brother was staying with him on a night, but he was alone during the day he was at college. Danny has been helping him when he can, but he is still very poorly with his mental health. We separated in August because neither of us could cope with the situation, so Danny left because he felt it was unfair on me, being his carer without any support from anybody else.
So I have been back home two days and have been too exhausted to post or do much else to be honest, but I am getting there. I do have some market stalls planned soon and content plan to continue with what I want to do because I now feel much better than I ever have because of the Meds.
Just feel a bit sad that I had to spend 50 years without a proper diagnosis, but still I’m happy that I think I might do well now because I now know why I am the way I am much love to you all and I probably won’t be able to reply individually because I have so much to catch up on, but I will be posting when I can and I will also comment on others photos when possible.
The photo i have posted reminds me of the queue waiting for their happy pills. They would knock on the bedrooms doors and shout meds please.
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Copyright ©2013 “Marco Rigamonti”. All rights reserved.
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Please don't use this image on websites, blogs or other media without my explicit permission. © Cristiana Damiano . All rights reserved. www.cristianadamiano.com