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“What is the point? We assume that every time we do anything we know what the consequences will be, i.e., more or less what we intend them to be. This is not only not always correct. It is wildly, crazily, stupidly, cross-eyed-blithering-insectly wrong!”

― Douglas Adams, The Ultimate Hitchhiker's Guide

 

2015 08 10 145742 Yorkshire York 1HDR

North-to-northwest view of Pleasant Valley, Monroe County, from the Appalachian Trail west of Wind Gap.

From the back cover:

 

Kinkie Manson had never had a girl of his own before Dorie. Tall, gangling, pimply-faced, he had always been on the fringe of the crowd that ran things at the high school. But when Dorie moved to town and took a shine to him, things really changed. With a hep chick of his own, he discovered, a guy really belonged!

 

So when Dorie suggested going with some of the gang to a deserted summer cabin for the weekend, Kinkie was all for it. Even when she suggested they turn the weekend into a honeymoon, he didn't hesitate. Only when she suggested how he could get the money they needed, did Kinkie wake up to reality.

 

But by then it was too late. He had to stick with Dorie, keep on the jump, and get himself in deeper and deeper. There was no turning back once you'd joined the kids who were really OUT FOR KICKS.

Poor little guy, got warts and pimples after the customs officer opened his box and touched him all over >_<

 

Knilch (German word for "twit", "lout", "jerk" or "bastard") is a Doll Chateau Andre, faceup by Sadomina.

 

www.facebook.com/BJDsadomina

www.instagram.com/sadomina

sadomina.tumblr.com/

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--Molly and Dillon enter the kitchen, arms filled with grocery bags—

 

Dillon: *tries to squeeze past the throng of people* “Erm, bit crowded…*looks around*…with people wearin’ concerned faces. What’s the story?”

 

Molly: *takes one look at Charley’s face, drops her bag to the floor, and signs* “Do I need to call Diego?” *reaches for her phone*

 

Charley: *signs/says* “I’m okay, Molls, and Diego is the last thing I need right now. One more dude up in here and my kitchen’s going to pop like a testosterone-filled pimple.” *wave of exhaustion hits suddenly, sways on her feet*

 

Dane: “Charley!”

 

Caid: “Whoa, Chuck. Sit down. I can catch Molly and Dillon up.” *gently ushers her to a seat*

 

Charley: “Thanks.” *collapses into a chair*

 

Caid: *turns to Dillon and Molly, begins talking/signing quickly, hands flying with graceful ease*

 

Charley: *watches Caid, eyes full of admiration* “He’s so good at that. Better than me…and maybe even Diego, too.”

 

Dane: *crouches down, eye-level with Charley* “Well, he’s had longer to practice. His grandmother started teaching him sign before he could talk. You okay, because you don’t look it. *grabs Charley’s hands, kisses them* You may not want to hear it again, but I’m so bloody sorry.”

 

Charley: *strokes Dane’s cheek* “I’m fine, and if I accept your apology—even if I don’t think it’s warranted at all—will you finally stop saying you’re sorry?”

 

Dane: “I’ll try.”

 

Charley: “Then, I accept.” *leans her forehead against his shoulder, closes eyes*

 

Dane: *frowns* “Chuck, you’re kind of warm.”

 

Charley (jokingly): “You used to think I was smoking hot. Now, I’m ‘kind of warm’? Guess I really do look like crap. Baking so does not agree with me.”

 

Caid: “And that’s it. You’re all caught up.”

 

Molly: *hurries over, throws her arms around Charley’s neck, face terrified*

 

Charley: *turns head, looks straight into Molly’s eyes, and slowly signs/says* “It is going to be fine. Nothing is going to happen to me. No one is going to hurt me.”

 

Molly: *releases Charley, begins signing rapidly, face feral*

 

Candy: “What’s she saying, Caid?”

 

Caid: *translates* “She’s not going to lose anyone else she loves, and if Dane’s brother really did purposely murder Alice, who happened to be carrying his child at the time, then he’s capable of anything. She wants Charley to come stay with her, Diego, and Bishop. She doesn’t want Charley outta her sight.”

 

Molly: *finishes signing, cuddles into the chair beside Charley, hugging her protectively*

 

Charley: *squeezes Molly’s hand*

 

Danny: “Molly has a point. Until this all gets straightened out, someone should stay with Charley. I don’t like the idea of her being here alone if this guy—whoever he is—shows up again. At least we know Mrs. Wilson is keeping an eye out for her. There’s sumthin’ to be said for nosy neighbors.”

 

Fashion Credits

***Any doll enhancements (i.e. freckles, piercings, eye color changes, haircuts) were done by me unless otherwise stated.***

 

Charley

Shorts: Sugarbabylovedoll (Etsy.com)

T-shirt: Clear-lan

Sneakers: Sekiguchi – Momoko – Go For Victory

Glasses: Sekiguchi – Momoko Separate

Necklace: Me

 

Doll is a Morning Dew Giselle transplanted to a Poppy body, re-rooted by the super-duper valmaxi(!!!)

  

Candy

Jeans: Clear-lan

Top & Belt: Cangaway (Etsy.com)

Sneakers: Sekiguchi – Momoko – After School Dash!

Hair scarf: Mattel – Playline – My Scene Chelsea

Necklace & Bracelets: Me

 

Doll is a Making a Scene Erin transplanted to a Misaki body.

  

Molly

Dress: Cangaway (Etsy.com)

Vest: IT – Dynamite Girls – Free Spirit Jett

Boots: Snow’s Shopping Paradise (eBay)

Earrings: IT

Necklace: Me

 

Doll is a She’s Not There Poppy Parker.

  

Danny

Jeans: IT – Homme – Style Strategy Lukas

Shirt: Kimberlee of Hazel Street Dezigns

Shoes: Mattel – Playline

Metal Bracelet: IT – 2016 FR Convention – Style Lab

Leather Cuff, Necklace & Belt: Me

 

Doll is a Style Strategy Lukas.

  

Dane

Pants: IT – 2016 FR Convention – Style Lab – Come As You Are Fashion

Shirt: Kelsie of Mutant Goldfish Designs; Screenprint added by me

Hoodie: Clear-lan

Sneakers: IT – Homme – Style Strategy Lukas

Necklace: Piecemeal here and there

 

Doll is a Night Vision Count Adrian.

  

Caid

Jeans: Kelsie of Mutant Goldfish Designs

Tank: Clear-lan

Sneakers: IT – 2016 FR Convention – Style Lab – Come As You Are Fashion

Belt: Miema (etsy.com)

Bracelets: IT – 2016 FR Convention – Style Lab

Bandana & Necklace: Me

 

Doll is a Dark Hunter Acheron.

  

Dillon

Shorts: IT – Homme – In the Mix Takeo

Tank: IT – Dynamite Boys – Summer Daze Kyu

Button-up & Belt: Kimberlee of Hazel Street Dezigns

Shoes: Volks – Who’s That Girl? – Selfish

Necklace: Piecemeal here and there

 

Doll is a 2013 Color Infusion Declan.

  

Haystack Mountain in Boulder, Colorado is but a pimple compared with the giant Rockies in the background. This area is a favorite for bicyclists. You can ride for miles without a traffic light or stop sign.

 

This photo was taken in the late afternoon so the sun really shows the haze. The direction of the photo is west and a little north. The lake is called Dodd Lake.

 

Here's another photo containing Haystack Mountain in the winter.

 

This photo is often my most viewed photo each day. I don't know why. I don't consider it anywhere near my best. Somehow it shows up in front of thousands of others when people search on "mountain" or "mountains."

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**************************************************************************

 

So what was the highwayman I had danced with on that fateful evening

Twilights Ghost

 

Uncanny was an exclamation used a lot by my grandPappa; I used to love to hear him say it, even though it was years before I knew its meaning. Uncanny is also the best word I can use to describe the following story:

 

I’m not sure if what follows is a true “ghost” story. I always thought of ghosts as being wispy things that people always talk about seeing, but never touching. And that’s another issue, I do not believe in ghosts, so why is it that people like me are the ones these type of things happen too. I couldn’t tell you the number of people who upon have heard this story exclaim, oh you saw a ghost, wish it had been me. The ones who want to believe never seem to ever actually see one.

 

As you can see, I have never placed much faith into supernatural occurrences. Even though my GrandPappa would tell some pretty spooky stories to my sisters, cousins , and I during late night fires around the hearth, I never really thought it could ever happen in real life. Now the romantic medieval tales of knights and princesses that my Móraí wove were another story, so to speak. Those I would fantasize about, and would desire strongly to become true, impressionable young lady that I was, and still am I’ll admit.

 

And that’s the rub.

 

The tale I am about to tell, really happened to me, many years ago. But as luck would have it, it favors my GrandPappas tales more so than my dear Móraí s.

 

GrandPappa was the dean of English Prose , Chatwick college, Surry, but it was my Móraí who was known for her stories, one of which was even published . They livedhappily on campus in a small stone cottage that once had been the livery for the historically old estate that now made up the College’s main campus. A medieval looking cottage made for lighting the imaginations of young girls.

 

One tale of my Móraí I can still recall vividly was about a local highwayman for whom Abbot‘s Chase, the road bordering the campus, was supposedly named. Craig Abbot supposedly held up the coach that my grandmothers great grand aunt Sarah had been a passenger in You could almost taste the suspense on the air as the highwayman courteously ( for a highwayman) had Sarah hand over her jewels, when my Móraí reached the part where Aunt Sarah had her hand kissed and had pleaded with him not to take her emerald ring, which had been a family keepsake she had received on her 18st birthday, She would have us spellbound with apprehension as to what would happen next( although we would hear the story many times over, and knew the outcome, it was always the same feeling). The highwayman had smile, slipping off Aunt Sarah’s rings, but allowed her to keep the emerald’s she wore around her throat. Poor Aunt Sarah had loved that ring, and it was not a family secret of the grief it caused her to lose it. But, romance always would overshadow reality, and my sisters and I would talk through the evening wondering what had become of such a dashing figure as my grandmothers masked highwayman. But it still remained a story, and nothing more. I had always hoped that I would dream myself into one of my Móraí’s tales, but no dashing prince, or romantic highwayman ever did.

 

It was years later that I would learn that my romantic highwayman had met his fate by the old bridge on Abbots Chase and had been hung. Legend had it that he was buried in the ancient cemetery that could still be found in those days, and maybe still there, in a small wooded corner of the campus estate.

 

Years later, after my grandparents had both passed on, and their old stone cottage a distant, but still warm memory, I attended Chatwick college with no direct plans or purpose to be there, other than to walk the same halls as my grandfather.

 

My experience happened one evening as I was attending a Masque Ball for charity on a blustery Halloween‘s eve. The Ball was being held at the posh old Ryder house in Chatwick Parish . My Girlfriend, Tallie, did not want to go alone, as friends are want to do, and convinced, or rather conned, me into going. I found an old green satin gown with a matching sash, from which a long brooch dangled, It had been a relic from a cousins wedding. I removed the satin sash and bow and it became a rather respectable little gown. I was also sporting the shiny emerald necklace that we had found among my Grandmother’s things. It was pretty, with glittery emeralds surrounding a petite diamond pendant that sparkled like the real thing.

 

So anyway, there I was, all dressed up, bored to tears as the saying quite correctly goes,, and of course no male seemed to notice me, and I was too shy to ask someone to dance. I remember watching my, friend off dancing with a , handsome bloke in , of course, a prince charming outfit. As I was snickering to myself over an image placed in my mind concerning his green nylon pantaloons, someone stepped onto the hem of my long gown. Turning around I tripped into a tall, bearded saturnine man sporting a black hood and mask. He caught my fall, and twirled me onto the dance floor. He was really light on his feet and had these intense, icy eyes staring from his mask An executioner I joked to him, knowing full well he was dressed like my Móraí’s quixotic highwayman. He did not answer, only looked me over with those wistful eyes. Silent type I remember remarking to him, trying to force a smile, but it did not work. He just grinned, remaining mute and mysterious Thinking back I realized that he had never really said anything the whole time we danced. He spoke to me through his eyes, sad and morose; it said everything that I had needed to know. And It had been enough.

 

He kissed my hand when the dance was finished, and still not uttering a word, turned and made his way towards the black oak doors leading to the English Gardens. On a sudden whim, I followed him

 

He stopped at the steps outside; an turning , looked back at me, then led me down the stairs. The walk through the deserted moonlit Garden was surreal, like being in one of my Móraí’s romantic tales. Coming to a break in the hedge , he went through. I followed, walking right into a low hanging cobweb spanning the opening. I bent over to free my long hair of the sticky web, I looked around, that quickly he had deserted me. My highwayman was gone, like a phantom in the night, or more likely a will o wisp of my imagination. But he had seemed real enough, so I did not dwell on the subject, just turned and headed back inside, my skirts swishing along the cobblestone.

 

I walked back to the hall and rejoined my girlfriend, who was sitting with her frog prince. As she introduced me to him she stopped, and placed a hand to my throat, asking me where my necklace had gotten off to. With a start I realized that it was gone, and we spent the rest of the evening fruitlessly tracking it down. But it, like the masked highwayman, did not reappear.

 

Now, as I said in the beginning, I was never one to have dreams, and even if I did, none save one, ever remained with me. That one dream I still vividly recall came later that evening... I had declined my friends offer to join her and her boyfriend Charles( forever the frog prince to me), to go out after the party. Instead I went back to my room, and still in the gown, picked up a text that some professor actually thought a normal being could make sense of, and stated to half heatedly study. I found my thoughts drifting to the party and wondering if the mysterious highwayman would come back into my life.

 

Suddenly I was alone, walking along a misted Abbots Chase , my long gown again swishing along the stones. Just ahead of me sat a misty shrouded mounted figure, outlined in darkness. Steam emits into the chilly night air from his horses’ flared nostrils. It shakes its head awaiting its masters orders. The cloaked figure looks left, then look down into a tree lined valley. The distant sound of horses carries up, and a lone coach comes into view

The carriage horses have just strained to come up from a small valley, the driver cracks his whip to keep them moving. He does not hear what they do, and he assumes their neighs are in answer to his whip. So he is totally unprepared when the horseman, clocked and masked, rides out from the trees and points a sword at him. He pulls to a jerking stop. “Stand and deliver” is the command he hears, The man’s voice muffled from beneath his mask.

 

Dismounting, the rider strolls casually up to the carriage door, and invites the occupants to step out. They do so, a gentleman first, An older man with the detached look of a sour judge. A bright gold chain encircling his waist, diamond cufflinks glint in the moonlight. Behind him, in the shadows of the carriage, emits the pleasing, to the masked figure, sounds of a rustling dress.

 

Behind the Judge, the open carriage door is bathed in moonlight. A whisper of satin precedes the pretty lady that enters into view. Easy does it the masked rider says as he helps her down, his words rolling pleasantly with a kindly English accent. I shall, she answers, head held proudly.

 

His eyes focus on her necklace as it lays glistening along her throat. In my dream, the same necklace That I had found in my Móraí’s jewel case. She steps down into a pool of moon light, revealing the shimmering silver frock that adorns her pretty figure, the gowns long skirts come cascading out as she steps down to the ground. Her hair is up, and a set of drippy emerald earrings sway freely, twinkling merrily about its forlorn wearer. Diamond rings, one a bright emerald sparkle along her slender gloved fingers.

 

” Nice of you to come dressed up this lovely evening, my pretty lass.” He smiles gallantly in her eyes, she blushes . What do you want,” the judge asks in a commanding voice. With a twinkle in his eyes, the bandit answers, “Well that’s the problem you see, my steed I need your valuables to purchase his feed. That right rapskellian, he says to the horse behind him, who snorts upon hearing his name and tosses his head, mane flowing. His words come across in an almost embarrassed apology. The Highwayman approaches the Judge, his horse waiting patiently in the background.

 

The figure walks up to him, and holds out his hand, fingers beckoning. At a sign of hesitation, the sword is produced and pointed at his waist. He hands over his fat wallet, gold watch and chain. His diamond cufflinks and emerald pin are also given over.. The booty is placed in a pocket of the the highway man’s cloak . Thank you sir, the highwayman says in an almost civil manner.

 

The Highwayman moves to the pretty lady in silver. The moon is seen behind her, framing her face casting a light through so very soft long hair.

 

With puppy sad eyes she looks into his, her heart melting. He moves forward, his sword drawn, and he brings up his gloved hand, lifting her necklace from her throat . Yes, he whispers genially, this for starters now please raise your hands. The look he is giving the area where her diamonds lay upon her throat, just above her ample bosom, is one of lustful desire.

Your jewels, then, miss, he asks her with a daunting voice. Her mouth pursed in a whimper, she sadly lowers her hands , reaches behind and fumbled for her earrings, they explodes into dazzling light as she pulls them reluctantly free and lays them upon the outstretched palm. She slides the bracelets off each wrist, then looking sadly at her shimmering rings, she pulls off the two diamond ones from her gloved fingers. She stops at the emerald ring, she looks up at him, please sir, may I keep it. My lady he says , taking her hand up in his. I cannot let you keep it, though I can tell it has meaning to you. He pulls it off. I will let you keep your necklace however my lady, so that you may sparkle this evening. Realizing he will not bargain, she steps back and watches miserably as her pile of jewelry glistens in his palm.

 

The horse comes back into view, his head moving up and down, snorting. The highwayman, sheathing his sword, leaves the group and walks backwards to the horse. “I thank you my good gentleman and fine lady, your contribution this evening is greatly appreciated.” The Judge looks at him with scorn, the pretty lady smiles a sad little smile The figure on foot remounts, and rides off.

 

Suddenly a cold wind comes howling down the road, I tried to wake, but felt myself paralyzed as The Highwayman road off, soon after soldiers on horseback come thundering after him down the road. He is far ahead and I see him cross the bridge, he dismounts and slapping rapskellianon the flank, now rider less, the horse gallops off down Abbots Chase. The masked highwayman darts under the bridge. As the soldiers cross the bridge in hot pursuit, he salutes them from his hiding spot. As I watch, he then goes up and works on of the flagstones loose on the bottom of the bridge, creating a little hallow. It is here that he places his ill-gotten gains, moving the stone back in place he moves onto the road, suddenly he turns around, looking back. I start to look also, but then am aware of a key in my door. Reluctantly I tried to hold onto my dream as I hear my roommates call. As I woke, I found my hand searching in vain for the necklace I had lost, the one he had said I could keep in my dream,.

The next day I discussed my dream with my girlfriend and her boyfriend after lecture. He suggested we should visit the old bridge and look for the loose flagstone. I chided him for his silliness; it was only a dream after all, a remnant of one of my Móraí’s stories. But after they left, I had a sort of odd, haunting feeling. I remember feeling my throat again for the necklace that I had worn. I rose and walked along campus until I reached Abbots Chase. It was almost surreal as I walked down it .The sun disappeared under some blustery autumn clouds, it grew colder, everything around me took on a colorless pale. Off to one side I soon saw the old cemetery, and for the first time in my life I went into it, looking over its crumbling gravestones, reading faint names of those long ago forgotten. I found it, off in a corner by itself. A long tall stone, with carved writing, faint with age ; Craig Abbot was written, and below what looked like the word hung. With a start I realized that the date he had departed from this earth was the very date I had gone to the dance, and chillingly, the date of last evening when I had my dream. I ran my fingers along the etchings, and then still in somewhat of a daze, I went back to the old road and drifted to the bride a short ways off. Upon reaching it, I remembered in vivid detail the stone he had pried away in my dream. I went to it and moved it. It did not budge at first, but to my surprise, stated to wobble, then it come down, exposing a small cavity. Wondering what it meant, I reached inside and felt around. My fingers curled around a small, cold object. Pulling it out I discovered it was a ring, upon further examination it was an emerald ring, one just like the one taken from the pretty young lady in my dream, similar to the one my Móraí had said my Aunt Sarah Had lost to Craig Abbot.

As I finally write this down from my memory, I am wearing the ring I discovered hidden away.. It is very old, and very pretty. What connection, if any it has with my story, I am unsure, but obviously there are many to be made. So was the highwayman I had danced with on that fateful evening I had lost my necklace : a ghost, a figment of my dream, some materialization of the late, hung Craig Abbot. Or merely a flesh and blood rogue whose identity I never will discover? And the ring I am now wearing, could it possibly be Aunt Sarah’s? Much like a ghost, the real answer may never be found.

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Courtesy of Chatwick University Archives

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DISCLAIMER

All rights and copyrights observed by Chatwick University, Its contributors, associates and Agents

 

The purpose of these chronological photos and accompanying stories, articles is to educate, teach, instruct, and generally increase the awareness level of the general public as to the nature and intent of the underlying criminal elements that have historically plagued humankind.

 

No Part of this can reprinted, duplicated, or copied be without the express written permission and approval of Chatwick University.

 

These photos and stories are works of fiction. Any resemblance to people, living or deceased, is purely coincidental.

As with any work of fiction or fantasy the purpose is for entertainment and/or educational purposes only, and should never be attempted in real life.

We accept no responsibility for any events occurring outside this website.

 

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found paper collage

on paper 10"x12"

The tiny pimple of Sergeant Man.

Queens Park Motors, Salford- affectionately known as Queenies to all the pimply youths around here who used to go and press their noses up to the window and drool over all those lovely motorcycles. Dunno why they did that - they could've gone inside lol.

  

The "heyday" as far as I'm concerned was in the early 80s - some of those bikes especially the two strokes are now fast appreciating "classics".

 

I always wondered why the shop was called Queens Park Motors and not Queens Park Motorcycles.

 

On Google Images there are a couple of photos right at the top of the search that were both taken on my camera. They actually generate a fair degree of speculation on social media, too.

 

Clearly the building isn't a motorcycle shop now - its some kind of "self contained apartments" but I don't recall seeing the word luxury anywhere. I'm not even sure what a "non" self - contained apartment is. A shared bathroom perhaps? Yuk.

 

The kerbing is the same, the conduit is still on the wall on the right and there are the holes where the bracket used to be.

 

Anyway in the spirit of my Flickr "revisited" album I tried to get the flavour of both of the original 1985 photos - clearly not an exact replica because there is nobody in the photo, just my Kawasaki. But its exactly the same spot (it took me a few minutes to figure it out, because it looks so different).

  

X649 SSM : Volvo FM12 6x2 Recovery Truck.

 

M40 - Gaydon, southbound. [Pimple Lane overbridge.]

 

22-11-2022

FKD 18x24cm, paper negative

6/52

 

I know there are those that believe aging is a right of passage and one should just get old gracefully, but to be honest with you as wonderful as it sounds it just doesn't sit well with me.

 

I finally grow up, have no more pimples, am wiser, more self-assured and certainly stronger and then...betrayal...my skin doesn't want to play the youth game and the signs of aging are as apparent as a neon sign in the desert. Damn!

 

I was born with bat ears, a strange confession to make on my birthday i know, but bear with me, there is a story here. I hated those ears,not their shape but the way they stood out like satellite dishes on a linear plane. I was teased at school and i avoided swimming so that no one would see them when i would come out of the pool with my hair plastered to my head. Try running in athletics so that your hair doesn't show those darned ears!

 

When I started working in Johannesburg i swore to myself i would see a plastic surgeon and have them fixed and this eventually came to pass. I can assure you that it was such a fantastic feeling. It still is.

Would i consider more plastic surgery? (not that repairing bat ears is major plastic surgery), Hell yes!

I'm going down kicking and screaming. I don't need big boobs or a bum lift.. these are all fine, but the face and neck. when the time is right and the money just waiting for gloved pastures... here i go..!

Not yogic?...hmmmm, i can live with it, but not with the sagging skin and don't tell me wrinkles look good on a woman - that's a lie..

I don't want jowls - just the word makes me beg for mercy. ..:)

 

I discovered i was a year younger than i thought. What a great gift. Shows you - now my mind is also starting to give in, this may in fact be a blessing - if i forget about all of the above, it won't matter.

Anyway, I'll redo 47 with greater energy!!!

 

Please don't use this image on websites, blogs or other media without my explicit written permission. © All rights reserved

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Agfa Vista 200

Diana F+ 35mm Film Back

CineStill c41

The Photograph

 

A 5" x 10" high-definition glossy photograph published by Rotary Photographic of London EC.

 

George Robey

 

Sir George Edward Wade, CBE, known professionally as George Robey, was an English comedian, singer and actor in musical theatre, who became known as one of the greatest music hall performers of the late 19th. and early 20th. centuries.

 

As a comedian, he mixed everyday situations and observations with comic absurdity. Apart from his music hall acts, he was a popular Christmas pantomime performer in the English provinces, where he excelled in the dame roles.

 

He scored notable successes in musical revues during and after the Great War, particularly with the song "If You Were the Only Girl in the World", which he performed with Violet Loraine in the revue The Bing Boys Are Here (1916).

 

One of George's best-known original characters in his six-decade long career was the Prime Minister of Mirth.

 

Born in London, Robey came from a middle-class family. After schooling in England and Germany, and a series of office jobs, he made his debut on the London stage at the age of 21, as the straight man to a comic hypnotist.

 

Robey soon developed his own act, and appeared at the Oxford Music Hall in 1890, where he earned favourable notices singing "The Simple Pimple," and "He'll Get It Where He's Gone to Now".

 

In 1892, he appeared in his first pantomime, Whittington Up-to-Date in Brighton, which brought him to a wider audience. More provincial engagements followed in Manchester, Birmingham and Liverpool, and he became a mainstay of the popular Christmas pantomime scene.

 

Robey's music hall act matured in the first decade of the 1900's, and he undertook several foreign tours. He starred in the Royal Command Performance in 1912, and regularly entertained before aristocracy.

 

George was an avid sportsman, playing cricket and football at a semi-professional level. During the Great War, in addition to his performances in revues, he raised money for many war charities, and was appointed a CBE in 1919.

 

From 1918, he created sketches based on his Prime Minister of Mirth character, and used a costume he had designed in the 1890's as a basis for the character's attire.

 

George made a successful transition from music hall to variety shows, and starred in the revue Round in Fifty in 1922, which earned him still wider notice. With the exception of his performances in revue and pantomime, he appeared as his Prime Minister of Mirth character in all the other entertainment media including variety, music hall and radio.

 

In 1913 Robey made his film debut, but he had only modest success in the medium. He continued to perform in variety theatre in the inter-war years and, in 1932, starred in Helen!, his first straight theatre role. His appearance brought him to the attention of many influential directors, including Sydney Carroll, who signed him to appear on stage as Falstaff in Henry IV, Part 1 in 1935, a role that he later repeated in Laurence Olivier's 1944 film, Henry V.

 

During the Second World War, Robey raised money for charities and promoted recruitment into the forces. By the 1950's, his health had deteriorated, and he entered into semi-retirement. George was knighted a few months before his death in 1954.

 

-- George Robey - The Early Years

 

Robey was born on the 20th. September 1869 at 334 Kennington Road, Kennington, London. He would later claim that he was born in the more affluent area of Herne Hill, although this was incorrect. His birthplace in Kennington is a three-storey house above a shop, which was then a hardware outlet. The shop is now home to a sushi restaurant called Sushi Essence.

 

In the 1860's, Kennington Road was a wealthy area mainly inhabited by successful tradesmen and businessmen. By the 1880's however, the area had fallen into a decline, and was considered by locals to be one of the most impoverished areas in London. The comedian Charlie Chaplin, who had a poor and deprived upbringing, was born in the same road 18 years after Robey.

 

George's father, Charles Wade, was a civil engineer who spent much of his career on tramline design and construction. Robey's mother, Elizabeth Mary Wade, née Keene, was a housewife; he also had two sisters.

 

George's paternal ancestors originated from Hampshire; his uncle, George Wade, married into the aristocracy in 1848, a link which provided a proud topic of conversation for future generations of the Wade family.

 

When Robey was five, his father moved the family to Birkenhead, where he helped in the construction of the Mersey Railway. Robey began his schooling in nearby Hoylake at a dame school. Three years later the family moved back to London, near the border between Camberwell and Peckham.

 

At around this time, trams were being introduced to the area, providing Charles Wade with a regular, well-paid job.

 

To fulfil an offer of work, Charles moved the family to Germany in 1880, and Robey attended a school in Dresden. He devoted his leisure hours to visiting the city's museums, art galleries and opera houses, and gained a reasonable fluency in German by the time he was 12.

 

He enjoyed life in Germany, and was impressed by the many operatic productions held in the city, and by the Germans' high regard for the arts.

 

When he was 14, his father allowed George to move in with a clergyman's family in the German countryside, which he used as a base while studying science at Leipzig University. In order to earn money, he taught English to his landlord's children, and minded them while their parents were at work.

 

Having successfully enrolled at the university, George studied art and music, and stayed with the family for a further 18 months so he could complete his studies before returning to England in 1885. He later claimed, apparently untruthfully, to have studied at the University of Cambridge.

 

There is no evidence that Robey enrolled at Cambridge or indeed any other English university, as fees in Victorian England were beyond the reach of someone like Charles Wade. Members of the theatrical community were nevertheless convinced of his attendance at Cambridge.

 

The theatre critic Max Beerbohm wrote that Robey was one of the few distinguished men to emerge from the campus, but the English writer Neville Cardus was more sceptical, wondering how someone from the University of Cambridge could end up in the music hall.

 

Robey's biographer, Peter Cotes, concludes that he likely played along with the assumptions that he was a Cambridge graduate in order to fit in with the higher circles of society.

 

At the age of 18, Robey travelled to Birmingham, where he worked in a civil engineer's office. It was here that he became interested in a career on the stage, and often dreamed of starring in his own circus.

 

He learned to play the mandolin, and became a skilled performer on the instrument. This drew interest from a group of local musicians and, together with a friend from the group who played the guitar, Robey travelled the local area in search of engagements.

 

Soon afterwards, they were hired to play at a charity concert at the local church in Edgbaston, a performance that led to more local bookings. For his next appearance, Robey performed an impromptu version of "Killaloo", a comic ditty taken from the burlesque Miss Esmeralda.

 

The positive response from the audience encouraged him to give up playing the mandolin to concentrate instead on singing comic songs.

 

-- George Robey's London Debut

 

By 1890 Robey had become homesick, and so he returned to South London, where he worked for a civil engineering company. He also joined a local branch of the Thirteen Club, which charged members a fee of half a crown a year. The club members, including both amateur and professional performers, were devoted to the idea of flouting superstition while staging concerts in public houses and small venues across London.

 

Hearing of George's talent, the founder of the club, W. H. Branch, invited Robey to appear at Anderton's Hotel in Fleet Street, where he performed the popular new comic song "Where Did You Get That Hat?".

 

Robey's performance secured him private engagements for which he was paid a guinea a night. By the early months of 1891, Robey was much in demand, and he decided to change his stage name. He swapped "Wade" for "Robey" after working for a company in Birmingham that bore the latter name.

 

It was at around this time that he met E. W. Rogers, an established music hall composer who wrote songs for Marie Lloyd and Jenny Hill. For Robey, Rogers wrote three songs: "My Hat's a Brown 'Un", "The Simple Pimple," and "It Suddenly Dawned Upon Me".

 

In 1891 Robey visited the Royal Aquarium in Westminster where he watched "Professor Kennedy", a burlesque mesmerist from America. After the performance, Robey visited Kennedy in his dressing room, and offered himself as the stooge for his next appearance.

 

They agreed that Robey, as his young apprentice, would be "mesmerised" into singing a comic song. At a later rehearsal, Robey negotiated a deal to sing one of the comic songs that had been written for him by Rogers.

 

Robey's turn was a great success, and as a result he secured a permanent theatrical residency at the venue. Later that year, he appeared as a solo act at the Oxford Music Hall, where he performed "The Simple Pimple" and "He'll Get It Where He's Gone to Now".

 

The theatrical press soon became aware of his act, and The Stage called him:

 

"A comedian with a pretty sense of

humour who delivers his songs with

considerable point and meets with

all success".

 

In early 1892 Robey starred alongside Jenny Hill, Bessie Bonehill and Harriet Vernon at the Paragon Theatre of Varieties in Mile End, where, according to his biographer Peter Cotes:

 

"He stole the notices from

experienced troupers".

 

That summer, Robey conducted a music hall tour of the English provinces which began in Chatham and took him to Liverpool, at a venue owned by the mother of the influential London impresario Oswald Stoll. Through this engagement Robey met Stoll, and the two became lifelong friends.

 

In early December, Robey appeared in five music halls a night, including Gatti's Under the Arches, the Tivoli Music Hall and the London Pavilion.

 

In mid-December, George travelled to Brighton, where he appeared in his first Christmas pantomime, Whittington Up-to-Date. Pantomime became a lucrative and regular source of employment for the comedian. Cotes calls Robey's festive performances:

 

"The cornerstone of his comic

art, and the source of some of

his greatest successes".

 

-- Music Hall Characterisations

 

During the 1890's Robey created music hall characters centred on everyday life. Among them were "The Chinese Laundryman" and "Clarence, the Last of the Dandies". As Clarence, Robey dressed in a top hat and frock coat, and carried a Malacca cane, the garb of a stereotypical Victorian gentleman.

 

For his drag pieces, the comedian established "The Lady Dresser", a female tailor who was desperate to out-dress her high class customers, and "Daisy Dillwater, the District Nurse" who arrived on stage with a bicycle to share light-hearted scandal and gossip with the audience before hurriedly cycling off.

 

With Robey's popularity came an eagerness to differentiate himself from his music hall rivals, and so he devised a signature costume when appearing as himself: an oversized black coat fastened from the neck down with large, wooden buttons.

 

George also wore black, unkempt, baggy trousers and a partially bald wig with black, whispery strands of dishevelled, dirty-looking hair that poked below a large, battered top-hat.

 

He applied thick white face paint, and exaggerated the redness on his cheeks and nose with bright red make-up; his eye line and eyebrows were also enhanced with thick, black greasepaint. He held a short, misshaped, wooden walking stick, which was curved at the top.

 

Robey later used the costume for his character, The Prime Minister of Mirth. The outfit helped Robey become instantly recognisable on the London music hall circuit. He next made a start at building his repertoire, and bought the rights to comic songs and monologues by several well-established music hall writers, including Sax Rohmer and Bennett Scott.

 

For his routines, Robey developed a characteristic delivery described by Cotes as:

 

"A kind of machine-gun staccato

rattle through each polysyllabic line,

ending abruptly, and holding the

pause while he fixed his audience

with his basilisk stare."

 

-- Success in Pantomime and the Provinces

 

At the start of 1894, Robey travelled to Manchester to participate in the pantomime Jack and Jill, where he was paid £25 a week for a three-month contract. He did not appear in Jack and Jill until the third act, but pleased the holiday crowds nonetheless.

 

During one performance the scenery mechanism failed, which forced him to improvise for the first time. Robey fabricated a story that he had just dined with the Lord Mayor before detailing exactly what he had eaten. The routine was such a hit that it was incorporated into the show as part of the script.

 

In the final months of 1894, Robey returned to London to honour a contract for Augustus Harris at the Theatre Royal, Drury Lane, the details of which are unknown.

 

In September he starred in a series of stand-up comedy shows that he performed every September from 1894 until 1899. These short performances, in English seaside resorts including Scarborough and Bournemouth, were designed chiefly to enhance his name among provincial audiences.

 

For the 1895 and 1896 Christmas pantomimes, he appeared in Manchester and Birmingham respectively, in the title role of Dick Whittington, for which he received favourable reviews and praise from audiences.

 

However despite the pantomime's success, Robey and his co-stars disliked the experience. The actress Ada Reeve felt that the production had a bad back-stage atmosphere, and was thankful when the season ended, while the comedian Barry Lupino was dismayed at having his role, Muffins, considerably reduced.

 

On the 29th. April 1898, Robey married his first wife, the Australian-born musical theatre actress Ethel Hayden (shown in the photograph), at St. Clement Danes church in the Strand, London. Robey and Ethel resided briefly in Circus Road, St John's Wood, until the birth of their first child Edward in 1900.

 

They then moved to 83 Finchley Road in Swiss Cottage, Hampstead. Family life suited Robey; his son Edward recalled many happy experiences with his father, including the evenings when he would accompany him to the half-dozen music halls at which he would be appearing each night.

 

By the start of the new century, Robey was a big name in pantomime, and he was able to choose his roles. Pantomime had enjoyed wide popularity until the 1890's, but by the time Robey had reached his peak, interest in it was on the wane.

 

A type of character he particularly enjoyed taking on was the pantomime dame, which historically was played by comedians from the music hall. Robey was inspired by the older comedians Herbert Campbell and Dan Leno, and, although post-dating them, he rivalled their eccentricity and popularity, earning the festive entertainment a new audience.

 

In his 1972 biography of Robey, Neville Cardus thought that:

 

"George Robey was at his

fullest as a pantomime Dame".

 

In 1902 Robey created the character "The Prehistoric Man". He dressed as a caveman, and spoke of modern political issues, often complaining about the government "slapping another pound of rock on his taxes".

 

The character was received favourably by audiences, who found it easy to relate to his topical observations. That year he released "The Prehistoric Man" and "Not That I Wish to Say Anything" on shellac discs using the early acoustic recording process.

 

Robey signed a six-year contract in June 1904 to appear annually at, among other venues, the Oxford Music Hall in London, for a fee of £120 a week. The contract also required him to perform during the spring and autumn seasons between 1910 and 1912.

 

Robey disputed this part of the contract, and stated that he agreed to this only as a personal favour to the music hall manager George Adney Payne, and that it should have become void on Payne's death in 1907.

 

The management of the Oxford however counter-claimed, and forbade Robey from appearing in any other music hall during this period. The matter went to court, where the judge found in Robey's favour.

 

Robey was engaged to play the title role in the 1905 pantomime Queen of Hearts. The show was considered risqué by the theatrical press. In one scene Robey accidentally sat on his crown before bellowing:

 

"Assistance! Methinks I have

sat upon a hedgehog."

 

'Hedgehog' is a British slang term for an unattractive woman. It is also used to describe a seductively elusive and promiscuous male.

 

In another sketch, the comedian mused:

 

"Then there's Mrs Simkins, the swank!

Many's the squeeze she's had of my

blue bag on washing day."

 

Robey scored a further hit with the show the following year, in Birmingham, which Cotes describes as:

 

"The most famous of all famous

Birmingham Theatre Royal

pantomimes".

 

Robey incorporated "The Dresser", a music hall sketch taken from his own repertoire, into the show.

 

Over the next few years George continued to tour the music hall circuit both in London and the English provinces, and recorded two songs, "What Are You Looking at Me For?" and "The Mayor of Mudcumdyke", which were later released by the Gramophone and Typewriter Company.

 

-- George Robey's Involvement in Sport

 

Off-stage, Robey led an active lifestyle, and was a keen amateur sportsman. He was proud of his healthy physique, and maintained it by performing frequent exercise and following a careful diet.

 

By the time he was in his mid-thirties, George had played as an amateur against Millwall, Chelsea and Fulham football clubs. He organised and played in many charity football matches throughout England, which were described by the sporting press as being of a very high standard, and he remained an active football player well into his fifties.

 

Robey became associated with cricket by 1895 when he led a team of amateur players for a match at Turney Road in Dulwich. In September 1904, while appearing in Hull, he was asked by the cricketer Harry Wrathall to take part in a charity cricket match at the Yorkshire County Cricket Club.

 

Robey played so well that Wrathall asked him to return the following Saturday to take part in a professional game. That weekend, while waiting in the pavilion before the game, Robey was approached by an agent for Hull City A.F.C., who asked the comedian to play in a match that same afternoon. Robey agreed, swapped his cricket flannels for a football kit and played with the team against Nottingham Forest as an inside right.

 

By 1903 Robey was playing at a semi-professional level. He was signed as an inside forward by Millwall Football Club, and scored many goals for them. He also displayed a good level of ability in vigoro, an Australian sport derived from both cricket and baseball which was short-lived in England.

 

Two years later George became a member of the Marylebone Cricket Club, and played in minor games for them for many years. He gained a reputation at the club for his comic antics on the field, such as raising his eyebrows at the approaching bowler in an attempt to distract him.

 

The writer Neville Cardus was complimentary about Robey's cricket prowess, and called him "an elegant player" whose performances on the cricket field were as entertaining as they were on the stage. Although a versatile player, Robey thought of himself as a "medium-paced, right-handed bowler".

 

Robey was asked to help organise a charity football match in 1907 by friends of the Scottish football trainer James Miller, who had died the previous year. Robey compiled a team of amateur footballers from the theatrical profession, and met Miller's former team Chelsea Football Club at their home ground. The match raised considerable proceeds for Miller's widow. Robey was proud of the match and joked:

 

"I just wanted to make sure that

Chelsea stay in the first division."

 

-- George Robey the Violin Maker

 

In his spare time, Robey made violins, a hobby that he first took up during his years in Dresden. He became a skilled craftsman of the instrument, although he never intended for them to be played in public.

 

Speaking in the 1960's, the violinist and composer Yehudi Menuhin, who played one of Robey's violins for a public performance during that decade, called the comedian's finished instrument "very professional".

 

Yehudi was intrigued by the idea that a man as famous as Robey could produce such a "beautifully finished" instrument, unbeknown to the public.

 

Robey was also an artist, and some of his pen and ink self-caricatures are kept at the National Portrait Gallery, London.

 

-- High-Profile Audiences

 

Robey's first high-profile invitation came in the first decade of the 1900's from Hugh Lowther, 5th. Earl of Lonsdale, who hired him as entertainment for a party he was hosting at Carlton House Terrace in Westminster.

 

Soon afterwards, the comedian appeared for the first time before royalty when King Edward VII had Robey hired for several private functions. Robey performed a series of songs and monologues and introduced the "Mayor of Mudcumdyke", all of which was met with much praise and admiration from the royal watchers.

 

He was later hired by Edward's son, the Prince of Wales (the future King George V), who arranged a performance at Carlton House Terrace for his friend Lord Curzon.

 

In July 1912, at the invitation of the impresario Oswald Stoll, Robey took part for the first time in a Royal Command Performance, to which Cotes attributes:

 

"One of the prime factors in

his continuing popularity".

 

King George V and Queen Mary were "delighted" with Robey's comic sketch, in which he performed the "Mayor of Mudcumdyke" in public for the first time. Robey found the royal show to be a less daunting experience than the numerous private command performances that he gave during his career.

 

-- George Robey's Film Debut

 

Robey's first experience in cinema was in 1913, with two early sound film shorts: "And Very Nice Too," and "Good Queen Bess", made using the Kinoplasticon process, where the film was synchronised with phonograph records.

 

The following year, George tried to emulate his music hall colleagues Billy Merson and Charlie Austin, who had set up Homeland Films and found success with the Squibs series of films starring Betty Balfour.

 

Robey met filmmakers from the Burns Film Company, who engaged him in a silent short entitled "George Robey Turns Anarchist", in which he played a character who fails to blow up the Houses of Parliament.

 

George continued to appear sporadically in film throughout the rest of his career, although never achieving more than a modest amount of success.

 

-- George Robey in the Great War

 

At the outbreak of the Great War, Robey wanted to enlist in the army but, now in his 40's, he was too old for active service. Instead, he volunteered for the Special Constabulary, and raised money for charity through his performances as a comedian.

 

It was not uncommon for him to finish at the theatre at 1:00 am and then to patrol as a special constable until 6:00 am, where he would frequently help out during zeppelin raids.

 

George combined his civilian duties with work for a volunteer motor transport unit towards the end of the war, in which he served as a lieutenant. He committed three nights a week to the corps while organising performances during the day to benefit war charities.

 

Robey was a strong supporter of the Merchant Navy, and thought that they were often overlooked when it came to charitable donations. He raised £22,000 at a benefit held at the London Coliseum, which he donated in the navy's favour.

 

In 1914, for the first time in many years, Robey appeared in a Christmas pantomime as a male when he was engaged to play the title role in Sinbad the Sailor; Fred Emney Senior played the dame role.

 

Although the critics were surprised by the casting, it appealed to audiences, and the scenes featuring Robey and Emney together proved the most memorable.

 

During the war the demand for light entertainment in the English provinces guaranteed Robey frequent bookings and a regular income. His appearances in Manchester, Liverpool, Newcastle and Glasgow were as popular as his annual performances in Birmingham. His wife Ethel accompanied him on these tours, and frequently starred alongside him.

 

By the Great War, music hall entertainment had fallen out of favour with audiences. Theatrical historians blame the music hall's decline on the increasing salaries of performers and the halls' inability to present profitably the twenty or thirty acts that the audiences expected to see.

 

Revue appealed to wartime audiences, and Robey decided to capitalise on the medium's popularity. Stoll offered Robey a lucrative contract in 1916 to appear in the new revue 'The Bing Boys Are Here' at the Alhambra Theatre, London.

 

Dividing his time between three or four music halls a night had become unappealing to the comedian, and he relished the opportunity to appear in a single theatre. He was cast as Lucius Bing opposite Violet Loraine, who played his love interest Emma, and the couple duetted in the show's signature song "If You Were the Only Girl in the World", which became an international success.

 

This London engagement was a new experience for Robey, who had only been familiar with provincial pantomimes and week-long, one-man comedy shows. Aside from pantomime, he had never taken part in a long-running production, and he had never had to memorise lines precisely or keep to schedules enforced by strict directors and theatre managers.

 

The Bing Boys Are Here ran for 378 performances, and occupied the Alhambra for more than a year. The theatrical press praised Robey as:

 

"The first actor of the halls".

 

George made two films towards the end of the war: The Anti-frivolity League in 1916, and Doing His Bit the following year.

 

-- Zig-Zag to Joy Bells

 

Robey left the cast of The Bing Boys during its run, in January 1917, in order to star at the London Hippodrome in the lavishly staged revue Zig-Zag!.

 

Robey included a sketch based on his music hall character "The Prehistoric Man", with Daphne Pollard playing the role of "She of the Tireless Tongue". In another scene, he played a drunken gentleman who accidentally secures a box at the Savoy Theatre instead of an intended hotel room.

 

The audience appeared unresponsive to the character, so he changed it mid-performance to that of a naive Yorkshire man. The change provoked much amusement, and it became one of the most popular scenes of the show. Zig-Zag ran for 648 performances.

 

Stoll again secured Robey for the Alhambra in 1918 for a sequel, The Bing Boys on Broadway. The show, again co-starring Violet Loraine, matched the popularity of its predecessor, and beat the original show's run with a total of 562 performances.

 

Robey returned to the London Hippodrome in 1919 where he took a leading role in another hit revue, Joy Bells. Robey played the role of an old-fashioned father who is mystified over the changing traditions after the First World War.

 

He interpolated two music hall sketches: "No, No, No," which centred on turning innocent, everyday sayings into suggestive and provocative maxims, and "The Rest Cure," which told the story of a pre-op hospital patient who hears worrying stories of malpractice from his well-meaning friends who visit him.

 

Joy Bells ran for 723 performances.

 

In the Italian newspaper La Tribuna, the writer Emilio Cecchi commented:

 

"Robey, just by being Robey, makes us

laugh until we weep. We do not want to

see either Figaro or Othello; it is quite

enough for Robey to appear in travelling

costume and to turn his eyes in crab-like

fashion from one side of the auditorium

to another.

Robey's aspect in dealing with his audience

is paternal and, one might say, apostolic."

 

In the early months of 1919, Robey completed a book of memoirs, 'My Rest Cure', which was published later that year. During the run of Joy Bells he was awarded the Legion of Honour for raising £14,000 for the French Red Cross.

 

George declined a knighthood that same year because, according to Cotes, he was worried that the title would distance him from his working-class audiences; he was appointed a CBE by George V at Buckingham Palace instead.

 

On the morning of the penultimate Joy Bells performance, Robey was invited to Stoll's London office, where he was offered a role in a new revue at the Alhambra Theatre. On the journey, he met the theatre impresario Sir Alfred Butt, who agreed to pay him £100 more, but out of loyalty to Stoll, he declined the offer and resumed his £600 a week contract at the Alhambra.

 

-- George Robey in the Inter-War Years

 

On the 28th. July 1919, Robey took part in his second Royal Command Performance, at the London Coliseum. He and Violet Loraine sang "If You Were the Only Girl in the World".

 

A gap in the Alhambra's schedule allowed Stoll to showcase Robey in a new short film. "George Robey's Day Off" (1919) showed the comedian acting out his daily domestic routines to comic effect, but the picture failed at the box office. The British director John Baxter concluded that producers did not know how best to apply Robey's stage talents to film.

 

By 1920 variety theatre had become popular in Britain, and Robey had completed the successful transition from music hall to variety star. Pantomime, which relied on its stars to make up much of the script through ad lib, was also beginning to fall out of favour, and his contemporaries were finding it too difficult to create fresh material for every performance; for Robey, however, the festive entertainment continued to be a lucrative source of employment.

 

Robey's first revue of the 1920's was Johnny Jones, which opened on the 1st. June 1920 at the Alhambra Theatre. The show also featured Ivy St. Helier, Lupino Lane and Eric Blore, and carried the advertisement "A Robey salad with musical dressing".

 

One of the show's more popular gags was a scene in which Robey picked and ate cherries off St. Helier's hat, before tossing the stones into the orchestra pit which were then met by loud bangs from the bass drum.

 

A sign of George's popularity came in August 1920 when he was depicted in scouting costume for a series of 12 Royal Mail stamps in aid of the Printers Pension Corporation War Orphans and the Prince of Wales Boy Scout Funds.

 

Neville Cardus, in The Darling of the Halls (1972), writes:

 

"I think Robey's Mother Goose was, as far

as I know, the greatest piece of acting of

what is called the 'Dame' that I have ever

seen.

But then again his Dame Trot in Jack and

the Beanstalk was great comic acting.

It was incredible. Really a piece of wonderful

acting in a few minutes – acting you would

put on the same plane as you would any

great actor of the time."

 

The revue Robey en Casserole (1921) was next for Robey, during which he led a troupe of dancers in a musical piece called the "Policemen Ballet". Each dancer was dressed in a mock police uniform on top and a tutu below.

 

However the show was the first failure for George under Stoll's management. That December Robey appeared in his only London pantomime, Jack and the Beanstalk, at the Hippodrome. His biographer, Peter Cotes, remembered the comedian's interpretation of Dame Trot as:

 

"Enormously funny: a bucolic caricature

of a woman, sturdy and fruity, leathery

and forbidding.

Robey's comic timing was in a class of

its own."

 

In March 1922 Robey remained at the Hippodrome in the revue Round in Fifty, a modernised version of Round the World in Eighty Days, which proved to be another hit for the London theatre, and a personal favourite of the comedian.

 

Stoll brought Robey to cinema audiences a further four times during 1923. The first two films were written with the intention of showcasing the comedian's pantomime talents: 'One Arabian Night' was a reworking of Aladdin, while 'Harlequinade' visited the roots of pantomime.

 

-- Marriage Breakdown and Foreign Tours

 

One of Robey's more notable roles under Stoll was Sancho Panza in the 1923 film Don Quixote, for which he received a fee of £700 a week. However the amount of time he spent working away from home led to the breakdown of his marriage, and he separated from Ethel in 1923. He had a brief affair with one of his leading ladies, and walked out of the family home.

 

Robey made a return to the London Hippodrome in 1924 in the revue Leap Year. Leap Year was set in South Africa, Australia and Canada, and was written to appeal to the tourists who were visiting London from the Commonwealth countries.

 

Robey was much to their tastes, and his rendition of "My Old Dutch" helped the show achieve another long run of 421 performances.

 

Sky High was next, and opened at the London Palladium in March 1925. The chorus dancer Marie Blanche was his co-star, a partnership that caused the gossip columnists to comment on the performers' alleged romance two years previously. Despite the rumours, Blanche continued as his leading lady for the next four years, and Sky High lasted for 309 performances on the West End stage.

 

The year 1926 was lacking in variety entertainment, a fact largely attributed to the UK general strike that had occurred in May of that year. The strike was unexpected by Robey, who had signed the previous year to star in a series of variety dates for Moss Empires.

 

The contract was lucrative, made more so by the comedian's willingness to manage his own bookings. He took the show to the provinces under the title of Bits and Pieces, and employed a company of 25 artists as well as engineers and support staff.

 

Despite the economic hardships of Great Britain in 1926, large numbers of people turned out to see the show. George returned to Birmingham, a city where he was held in great affection, and where he was sure the audiences would embrace his new show.

 

However, censors demanded that he omit the provocative song "I Stopped, I Looked, I Listened" and that he heavily edit the sketch "The Cheat". The restrictions failed to dampen the audiences' enthusiasm, and Bits and Pieces enjoyed rave reviews. It ran until Christmas and earned a six-month extension.

 

In the spring of 1927 Robey took the opportunity to tour abroad, when he and his company took Bits and Pieces to South Africa, where it was received favourably. By the time he had left Cape Town, he had played to over 60,000 people, and had travelled in excess of 15,000 miles.

 

Upon his return to England in October, George took Bits and Pieces to Bradford. In August 1928, Robey and his company travelled to Canada, where they played to packed audiences for three months.

 

It was there that he produced a new revue, Between Ourselves, in Vancouver, which was staged especially for the country's armed forces. The Canadians were enthusiastic about Robey; he was awarded the freedom of the city in London, Ontario, made a chieftain of the Sarcee tribe, and was an honorary guest at a cricket match in Edmonton, Alberta. George described the tour as "one of unbroken happiness."

 

In the late 1920's Robey also wrote and starred in two Phonofilm sound-on-film productions, Safety First (1928), and Mrs. Mephistopheles (1929).

 

In early 1929 Robey returned to South Africa and then Canada for another tour with Bits and Pieces, after which he started another series of variety dates back in England. Among the towns he visited was Woolwich, where he performed to packed audiences over the course of a week.

 

In 1932 Robey appeared in his first sound film, The Temperance Fête, and followed this with Marry Me, which was, according to his biographer A. E. Wilson, one of the most successful musical films of the comedian's career. The film tells the story of a sound recordist in a gramophone company who romances a colleague when she becomes the family housekeeper.

 

By the later months of 1932, Robey had formed a romantic relationship with Blanche Littler (1897–1981), who then took over as his manager. The couple grew close during the filming of Don Quixote, a remake of the comedian's 1923 success as Sancho Panza.

 

Unlike its predecessor, Don Quixote had an ambitious script, big budget and an authentic foreign setting. Robey resented having to grow a beard for the role, and disliked the French climate and gruelling 12-week filming schedule. He refused to act out his character's death scene in a farcical way, and also objected to the lateness of the "dreadfully banal" scripts, which were often written the night before filming.

 

-- Venture Into Legitimate Theatre

 

Until 1932 Robey had never played in legitimate theatre, although he had read Shakespeare from an early age. That year he took the part of King Menelaus in Helen!, which was an English-language adaptation by A. P. Herbert of Offenbach's operetta La belle Hélène.

 

The show's producer C. B. Cochran, a longstanding admirer of Robey, engaged a prestigious cast for the production, including Evelyn Laye and W. H. Berry, with choreography by Léonide Massine and sets by Oliver Messel.

 

The operetta opened on the 30th. January 1932, becoming the Adelphi Theatre's most successful show of the year. The critic Harold Conway wrote that, while Robey had reached the pinnacle of his career as a variety star, which only required him to rely on his "breezy, cheeky personality", he had reservations about the comedian's ability to "integrate himself with the other stars ... to learn many pages of dialogue, and to remember countless cues."

 

After the run of Helen!, Robey briefly resumed his commitments to the variety stage before signing a contract to appear at the Savoy Theatre as Bold Ben Blister in the operetta Jolly Roger, which premiered in March 1933.

 

The production had a run of bad luck, including an actors' strike which was caused by Robey's refusal to join the actors' union Equity. The dispute was settled when he was included as a co-producer of the show, thus excluding him as a full-time actor. Robey made a substantial donation to the union, and the production went ahead.

 

Despite its troubles, the show was a success, and received much praise from the press. Harold Conway of the Daily Mail called the piece:

 

"One of the outstanding triumphs

of personality witnessed in a

London theatre".

 

Later that year, Robey completed his final autobiography, 'Looking Back on Life'. The literary critic Graham Sutton admired Robey for his honest and frank account, and thought that he was "at his best when most personal".

 

-- George Robey's Shakespearean Roles

 

According to Wilson, Robey revered Shakespeare and had an "excellent reading knowledge of the Bard" even though the comedian had never seen a Shakespeare play. As a child, he had committed to memory the "ghost" scene in Hamlet.

 

Writing in 1933, Cochran expressed the opinion that Robey had been a victim of a largely conservative and "snobbish" attitude from theatre managers, that the comedian was "cut out for Shakespeare", and that if he had been frequently engaged in playing the Bard's works, then "Shakespeare would probably have been popular."

 

In 1934, the theatre director Sydney Carroll offered Robey the chance to appear as Nick Bottom in A Midsummer Night's Dream at the Open Air Theatre, Regent's Park, but he initially declined the offer, citing a hectic schedule, including a conflict with his appearance in that year's Royal Variety Performance on the 8th. May.

 

George was also concerned that he would not be taken seriously by legitimate theatre critics, and knew that he would not be able to include a comic sketch or to engage in his customary resourceful gagging.

 

In the same year, Robey starred in a film version of the hit musical Chu Chin Chow. The New York Times called him "a lovable and laughable Ali Baba".

 

At the start of 1935 Robey accepted his first Shakespearean role, as Falstaff in Henry IV, Part 1, which surprised the press and worried fans who thought that he might retire the Prime Minister of Mirth.

 

The theatrical press were sceptical of a music hall performer taking on such a distinguished role; Carroll, the play's producer, vehemently defended his casting choice. Carroll later admitted taking a gamble on employing Robey, but wrote that:

 

"George Robey has unlimited courage

in challenging criticism and risking his

reputation on a venture of this kind; he

takes both his past and his future in both

hands, and is faced with the alternative

of dashing them into the depths or lifting

them to a height hitherto undreamt of."

 

Carroll further opined that:

 

"Robey has never failed in anything he

has undertaken. He is one of the most

intelligent and capable of actors."

 

Henry IV, Part I opened on the 28th. February at Her Majesty's Theatre, and Robey proved himself to be a capable Shakespearean actor, though his Shakespearean debut was marred initially by an inability to remember his lines.

 

A journalist from The Daily Express thought that Robey seemed uncomfortable, displayed a halting delivery and was "far from word perfect".

 

Writing in The Observer, the critic Ivor Brown said of Robey's portrayal:

 

"In no performance within my memory

has the actor been more obviously the

afflicted servant of his lines and more

obviously the omnipotent master of the

situation".

 

Another journalist, writing in the Daily Mirror, thought that:

 

"Robey gave 25 percent of

Shakespeare and 75 percent

of himself".

 

In any event, such was Robey's popularity in the role that the German theatre and film producer Max Reinhardt declared that, should the opportunity arise for a film version, the comedian would be his perfect choice as Falstaff.

 

Cotes described Robey as having:

 

"A great vitality and immense command

of the role. He never faltered, he had to

take his audience by the throat and make

them attentive at once because he couldn't

play himself in."

 

Although George was eager to be taken seriously as a legitimate actor, Robey provided a subtle nod in the direction of his comic career by using the wooden cane intended for the Prime Minister of Mirth for the majority of his scenes as Falstaff.

 

The poet John Betjeman responded to the critics' early scepticism:

 

"Variety artistes are a separate world

from the legitimate stage. They are

separate too, from ballet, opera, and

musical comedy.

It is possible for variety artists to

appear in all of these. Indeed, no one

who saw will ever forget the superb

pathos and humour of George Robey's

Falstaff".

 

Later, in 1935, Blanche Littler persuaded Robey to accept Carroll's earlier offer to play Bottom, and the comedian cancelled three weeks' worth of dates. The press were complimentary of his performance, and he later attributed his success to Littler and her encouragement.

 

-- George Robey's Later Career: 1936–1950

 

Robey was interviewed for The Spice of Life programme for the BBC in 1936. He spoke about his time spent on the music hall circuit, which he described as the "most enjoyable experience" of his life.

 

The usually reserved Robey admitted that privately he was not a sociable person, and that he often grew tired of his audiences while performing on stage, but that he got his biggest thrill from making others laugh.

 

He also declared a love for the outdoors, and mentioned that, to relax, he would draw "comic scribbles" of himself as the Prime Minister of Mirth, which he would occasionally give to fans. As a result of the interview he received more than a thousand fan letters from listeners.

 

Wilson thought that Robey's "perfect diction and intimate manner made him an ideal broadcast speaker". The press commented favourably on his performance, with one reporter from Variety Life writing:

 

"I doubt whether any speaker other than

a stage idol could have used, as Robey

did, the first person singular almost

incessantly for half an hour without

causing something akin to resentment. ...

The comedian's talk was brilliantly

conceived and written."

 

In the later months of 1936, Robey repeated his radio success with a thirty-minute programme entitled "Music-Hall", recorded for American audiences, to honour the tenth birthday of the National Broadcasting Corporation. In it, he presented a montage of his characterisations, as well as impressions of other famous acts of the day.

 

A second programme, which he recorded the following year, featured George speaking fondly of cricket and of the many well-known players whom he had met on his frequent visits to the Oval and Lord's cricket grounds over his fifty-year association.

 

In the summer of 1938 Robey appeared in the film A Girl Must Live, directed by Carol Reed, in which he played the role of Horace Blount. A report in the Kinematograph Weekly commented that:

 

"The 69-year-old comedian

is still able to stand up to the

screen by day, and variety

by night."

 

A journalist for The Times opined that Robey's performance as an elderly furrier, the love interest of both Margaret Lockwood and Lilli Palmer, was "a perfect study in bewildered embarrassment".

 

Robey made his television debut in August 1938, but was unenthused with the medium, and only made rare appearances. The BBC producer Grace Wyndham Goldie was dismayed at how little of his "comic quality" was conveyed on the small screen.

 

Goldie thought that Robey's comic abilities were not limited to his voice, and depended largely on the relation between his facial expressions and his witty words. She felt that:

 

"He should be forbidden, by his own

angel, if nobody else, to approach

the ordinary microphone".

 

Nonetheless, Goldie remained optimistic about Robey's future television career. The journalist L. Marsland Gander disagreed, and thought that Robey's methods were "really too slow for television".

 

That November, and with his divorce from Ethel finalised, Robey married Blanche Littler, who was more than two decades his junior, at Marylebone Town Hall.

 

At Christmas, he fractured three ribs and bruised his spine when he accidentally fell into the orchestra pit while appearing in the 1938–39 pantomime Robinson Crusoe in Birmingham. George attributed the fall to his face mask, which gave him a limited view of the stage.

 

The critic Harold Conway was less forgiving, blaming the accident on the comedian's "lost self-confidence" and opining that the accident was the start of Robey's professional decline.

 

-- George Robey in the Second World War

 

Aware of demand for his act in Australia, Robey conducted a second tour of the country at the start of 1939. While he was appearing at the Tivoli Theatre in Sydney, war broke out with Germany.

 

Robey returned to England and concentrated his efforts on entertaining in order to raise money for the war effort. He signed up with the Entertainments National Service Association (ENSA) for whom he appeared in a wide range of shows, and also in his own one-man engagements.

 

He would sometimes turn up unannounced to perform at hospitals, munition factories, airfields, anti-aircraft posts and other venues where there was an audience of just a few people.

 

During the 1940's, Robey appeared predominantly in troop concerts as himself, but caused controversy by jokingly supporting the Nazis and belittling black people during his act. His intentions were to gently poke fun at the "Little Englanders", but audiences thought that he was sympathising with Nazism.

 

George's jocular view that a defeat for Hitler would mean a victory for bolshevism was highlighted in a series of controversial interviews, which caused him much embarrassment when challenged and which he regretted afterwards. His views became known in the press as "Robeyisms", and they drew increasing criticism, but his Prime Minister of Mirth remained popular, and he used the character to divert the negative publicity.

 

Cotes wrote that:

 

"Robey was not a politician, merely a

jingoist, who lived long enough to feel

that his little-Englander outlook was

causing him acute embarrassment, and

his army of admirers deep dismay."

 

Robey starred in the film Salute John Citizen in 1942, about the effects that the war had on a normal British family. In a 1944 review of the film, Robey was described as being "convincing in an important role" but the film itself had "dull moments in the simple tale".

 

That Christmas, Robey travelled to Bristol, where he starred in the pantomime Robinson Crusoe. A further four films followed in 1943, one of which promoted war propaganda while the other two displayed the popular medium of cine-variety. Cine-variety introduced Robey to the Astoria in Finsbury Park, London, a venue which was used to huge audiences and big-name acts and was described as "a super-cinema".

 

During the early months of 1944, Robey returned to the role of Falstaff when he appeared in the film version of Henry V, produced by Eagle-Lion Films. The American film critic Bosley Crowther had mixed opinions of the film. Writing in The New York Times in 1946, he thought that:

 

"It showcased a fine group of British film

craftsmen and actors who contributed to

a stunningly brilliant and intriguing screen

spectacle. Despite this, the film's additional

screenplay was poor, and Falstaff's deathbed

scene was non-essential and just a bit

grotesque."

 

Late in 1944, George appeared in Burnley in a show entitled Vive Paree alongside Janice Hart and Frank O'Brian. In 1945, Robey starred in two minor film roles, as "Old Sam" in The Trojan Brothers, a short comedy film in which two actors experience various problems as a pantomime horse, and as "Vogel" in the musical romance Waltz Time.

 

-- George Robey's Final Years

 

George spent 1947 touring England, while the following spring he undertook a provincial tour of Frederick Bowyer's fairy play The Windmill Man, which he also co-produced with his wife.

 

In June 1951, now aged 81, Robey starred in a midnight gala performance at the London Palladium in aid of the family of Sid Field who had died that year. For the finale, Robey performed "I Stopped, I Looked, I Listened" and "If You Were the Only Girl in the World". The rest of the three-hour performance featured celebrities from radio, television and film.

 

The American comedian Danny Kaye, who was also engaged for the performance, called Robey:

 

"A great, great artist".

 

The same month, Robey returned to Birmingham, where he opened a garden party at St. Mary and St. Ambrose Church, a venue in which he had appeared at the beginning of his career. On the 25th. September George appeared for the BBC in an edition of the radio series Desert Island Discs for which he chose among others "Mondo ladro", Falstaff's rueful complaint about the wicked world in Verdi's opera Falstaff.

 

For the rest of the year Robey made personal appearances opening fêtes and attending charity events.

 

Robey took part in the Festival of Variety for the BBC in 1951, which paid tribute to the British music hall. For his performance, he adopted an ad-lib style rather than use a script. His wife sat at the side of the stage, ready to provide support should he need it. Robey's turn earned the loudest applause of the evening.

 

The following month Robey undertook a long provincial tour in the variety show Do You Remember? under the management of Bernard Delfont. After an evening's performance in Sheffield, he was asked by a local newspaper reporter if he considered retiring. The comedian quipped:

 

"Me retire? Good gracious, I'm too

old for that. I could not think of

starting a new career at my age!"

 

In December 1951, he opened the Lansbury Lodge home for retired cricketers in Poplar, East London; he considered the ceremony to be one of the "happiest memories of his life."

 

By early 1952, Robey was becoming noticeably frail, and he lost interest in many of his sporting pastimes. Instead, he stayed at home and drew comic sketches featuring the Prime Minister of Mirth.

 

In May he filmed The Pickwick Papers, in which he played the role of old Tony Weller, a part which he had initially turned down on health grounds. The following year, and in aid of the games fund, he starred as Clown in a short pantomime at the Olympic Variety Show at the Victoria Palace Theatre.

 

Organisers asked for him to appear in the Prime Minister of Mirth costume instead of the usual clown garb, a request the comedian was happy to fulfil.

 

-- Sir George Robey's Knighthood and Death

 

In the early months of 1954, a knighthood was conferred on Robey by Queen Elizabeth The Queen Mother at Buckingham Palace. However during the following weeks, George's health declined; he became confined to a wheelchair, and spent the majority of his time at home under the care of his wife.

 

In May he opened a British Red Cross fête in Seaford, East Sussex, and, a month later, made his last public appearance, on television as a panellist in the English version of The Name's the Same.

 

Wilson called Robey's performance "pathetic" and thought that:

 

"He appeared with only

a hint of his old self".

 

By June George had become housebound, and quietly celebrated his 85th. birthday surrounded by family; visiting friends were organised into appointments by his wife Blanche, but theatrical colleagues were barred in case they caused the comedian too much excitement.

 

Robey suffered a stroke on the 20th. November 1954, and remained in a semi-coma for just over a week. He died at the age of 85 on the 29th. November 1954 at his home in Saltdean, East Sussex, and was cremated at the Downs Crematorium in Brighton.

 

Blanche continued to live on the Sussex coast until her death at the age of 83 in 1981.

 

-- Sir George Robey's Legacy

 

Following his death, Robey's costume for the Prime Minister of Mirth was donated to the London Museum.

 

In his lifetime, Robey helped to earn more than £2,000,000 for charitable causes, with £500,000 of that figure being raised during the Great War.

 

In recognition of his efforts, the Merchant Seaman's Convalescent Home in Limpsfield, Surrey, named a ward after him, and the Royal Sussex Hospital later bought a new dialysis machine in his memory.

 

-- Tributes to George Robey

 

News of Robey's death prompted tributes from the press, who printed illustrations, anecdotes and reminders of his stage performances and charitable activities. A reporter from the Daily Worked wrote:

 

"Knighthood notwithstanding, George

Robey long ago made himself a place

as an entertainer and artist of the people."

 

A critic for the Daily Mail wrote:

 

"Personality has become a wildly

misused word since his heyday, but

George Robey breathed it in every

pore."

 

In Robey's obituary in The Spectator, Compton Mackenzie called the comedian:

 

"One of the last great figures of

the late Victorian and Edwardian

music-hall."

 

In December 1954, a memorial service for Robey was held at St. Paul's Cathedral. The diverse congregation consisted of royalty, actors, hospital workers, stage personnel, students and taxi drivers, among others.

 

The Bishop of Stepney, Joost de Blank, said:

 

"We have lost a great English music

hall artist, one of the greatest this

country has known in the late

nineteenth and twentieth centuries."

 

Performers gave readings at the service, including the comedian Leslie Henson, who called Robey:

 

"That great obstinate

bullock of variety".

 

Robey's comic delivery influenced other comedians, but opinions of his effectiveness as a comic vary. The radio personality Robb Wilton acknowledged learning a lot from him, and although he felt that:

 

"Robey was not very funny, but

he could time a comic situation

perfectly."

 

Similarly, the comedian Charlie Chester admitted that:

 

"As a comedian, Robey still didn't

make me laugh, although he was

a legend whose Prime Minister of

Mirth character used a beautiful

make-up design."

 

Robey's biographer Peter Cotes disagreed with these assessments, praising the comedian's "droll-like humour," and comparing it in greatness to Chaplin's miming and Grock's clowning. Cotes wrote:

 

"His Mayor, Professor of Music, Saracen,

Dame Trot, Queen of Hearts, District Nurse,

Pro's Landlady, and of course his immortal

Prime Minister, were all absurdities: rich,

outsize in prim and pride, gloriously

disapproving bureaucratic petty officialdom

at its worst, best and funniest."

 

Violet Loraine called her former co-star:

 

"One of the greatest comedians

the world has ever known".

 

The theatrical producer Basil Dean opined that:

 

"George was a great artist, one of

the last and really big figures of

his era. They don't breed them like

that now."

 

The actor John Gielgud, who remembered meeting Robey at the Alhambra Theatre in 1953, called the comedian:

 

"Charming, gracious, and one of the

few really great ones of the music

hall era."

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The adult shell is ovoid and is likened to a coffee bean in Dutch, French and Norwegian and to a kernel of oats in Scots.

Profile of right side (R) and left (L) when in living position.

1: approximate position of enveloped spire at posterior.

2 - 2: apertural face (ventral on live animal) is white.

3: dorsal and lateral faces have pinkish shell-material deposited in grooves.

4: no varix on columellar side of body-whorl; whorl bulges down centrally.

5: thickened white labial varix near palatal lip.

Adult, height (longest dimension) 10.8 mm. August 2010. Menai Strait, Wales.

 

Full SPECIES DESCRIPTION BELOW

PDF available at www.researchgate.net/publication/377074913_Trivia_monacha...

OTHER SPECIES: www.flickr.com/photos/56388191@N08/collections/

 

Trivia monacha (da Costa, 1778)

Synonyms: Cypraea monacha da Costa, 1778 ; Cypraea europaea Montagu, 1808 [ = aggregate of T. monacha and T. arctica in Forbes & Hanley, Jeffreys, and many authors pre-1925]; Cypraea europaea var. tripunctata Bucquoy, Dautzenberg & Dollfus, 1883.

Meaning of name: Trivia (Latin) = a common thing

monacha (Greek) = solitary, or (Latin) = nun.

Vernacular: Spotted cowrie (English); Gevlekt koffieboontje (Dutch); Porcelaine tachetée (French).

Names applied to both T. monacha and T. arctica: European cowrie, nun, sea-cradle, maiden, stick-farthing, (English); Groatie-buckie (Scots); Cragen Fair (Welsh); Europäische Kauri (German); Pucelage; Pou-de-mer; Porcelaine puce; Grain de café (French); Kaffebønne (Norwegian); Freirinha (Portuguese) .

 

GLOSSARY below.

 

Adult shell description

In Britain, adult shells are usually not less than 10 mm and up to 13 mm high (longest dimension of shell) by about 8 mm wide 1Tm flic.kr/p/CEqony . They are broadest towards the apical end. Pelseneer (1932), in Lebour (1933), states height extremes are 8.35 to 15.4mm. The adult shell is ovoid with a flatter apertural/ventral face 2Tm flic.kr/p/CGERbH which is likened to a coffee bean in Dutch, French and Norwegian and to a kernel of oats in Scots. The adult shell is convolute, meaning that all earlier whorls are hidden from view by the enveloping final whorl. A slight pimple or mound on the posterior end sometimes indicates the position of the hidden apex. It is solidly built with a sculpture of 20 to 25 ribs crossing entire the shell with a few short intervening ribs. The grooves are about the same width as the ribs. Nearly always, some of the ribs of left and right sides are not perfectly aligned where they meet on the dorsum 04.1Tm flic.kr/p/2nuUyie & 04.2Tm flic.kr/p/2pog9zY .There is a thickened white labial varix on the palatal side of the aperture 2Tm flic.kr/p/CGERbH .

The aperture is a gently curved slit along the entire height of the shell. It is positioned ventrally on the living animal. The outer (palatal) lip of the aperture curves out of sight into the interior of the shell 1Tm flic.kr/p/CEqony . The columellar region is a concave furrow and its ribs protrude as teeth. An expansion of the aperture at the anterior forms an inhalant siphonal canal, and an expansion at the posterior forms an exhalant siphonal canal.

Colour: the opaque shell is white internally and externally, apart from a thin external pinkish layer deposited, when adult, in the grooves dorsally and laterally by the external mantle 3Tm flic.kr/p/BSsv7u The mantle also deposits three pitch-brown/black dorsal marks on the shell dorsally 4Tm flic.kr/p/BSstYs . The posterior mark is usually the largest. Colours may fade after death 1Tm flic.kr/p/CEqony and all colours may be bleached white if exposed to the sun. The ribs and median dorsal stripe receive variable amounts of pigmented layer so may be tinted slightly or remain whitish 4Tm flic.kr/p/BSstYs . The ventral/apertural surface and labial varix are white 2Tm flic.kr/p/CGERbH . The shells of live animals are glossy and lack erosion or epizooic growths as they are protected and maintained by the mantle which is able to continue shell deposition on the exterior 1Tm flic.kr/p/CEqony . There is no operculum or periostracum on adults.

 

Post-veliger shell development

Metamorphosis occurs when the echinospira shell is about 1.6 mm diameter (Lebour, 1933). As the outer layer is cast off then (Fretter & Graham, 1962) the initial post-veliger shell is probably smaller.

The flimsy white juvenile shell, lacking operculum or periostracum grows up to 12 mm high and changes form as it grows 5Tm flic.kr/p/BSzH7X & 6Tm flic.kr/p/CnQVrj . Stages A-G, below, merge into each other. Sizes are of specimens photographed; but changes can occur at other sizes because of individual variation.

A) juvenile up to c 3.5 mm high:

The ovoid body whorl makes up 92-96% of the shell height 6.2Tm flic.kr/p/CAtAUh . The very small, 1.2 mm diameter, spire making 4-8% of the shell height, consists of the one and a half whorls of the discoid larval protoconch. It is glossier than the rest of the shell 6.1Tm flic.kr/p/DopySS . There is no umbilicus and no sculpture apart from fine prosocline growth lines. The D-shaped aperture is 82-96% of the shell height. It is wide open basally and narrows adapically 6.3Tm flic.kr/p/CAAqtc . The adapical angle is narrow. The palatal (outer) lip is thin and semi-circular and there is a short, thin columellar lip basally.

B) juvenile 6.4 mm high: 7Tm flic.kr/p/CnQU5S

The shell is as at stage A, except that it has developed a distinct spire, 15.5% of the shell height, of 3-4 convex whorls with distinct sutures. The body whorl is c. 92% of shell height and the D-shaped aperture c. 84% of shell height. The adapical angle of the aperture is c. 25º.

C) juvenile 9.3 mm high: 8Tm flic.kr/p/CEqegY

The shell is more ovoid and the body whorl and aperture are 100% of shell height. Most snails increase the relative length of spire with growth at this stage, but on Trivia it is reduced to 5% of height, and exposed level with the top of body whorl. The adapical angle is wider and the columellar lip is no longer differentiated.

D) juvenile 9.6 mm high: 9Tm flic.kr/p/CGEGxa

The spire is c. 3% of shell height. A sculpture of ribs and grooves has commenced formation on the apertural face (ventral face when animal alive). It now has a gently curved linear aperture, as on adults but wider, and the palatal lip is bent into the aperture so its edge is hidden.

E) juvenile 11.7 mm high: 10Tm flic.kr/p/CnQPZs

The spire is c. 2.5% of height and there is a slight development of ribs on the abapertural (dorsal) surface. At this stage the shell is often larger than some adults. This appears to because the mantle changes in parts to resorb, instead of deposit, calcium carbonate during the change to adult. This was disputed by Forbes & Hanley (1853), but close examination of specimens undergoing the change show grooves cut below the level of the yet unaffected juvenile areas of the shell, leaving ribs of juvenile shell between the grooves 11Tm flic.kr/p/2ijnsgt .

F) pre-adult:

Post-veliger juvenile shells grow in the normal three-layered spiral fashion of most other snails (Meyer & Paulay, 2005). This changes as the transition to adult takes place when i) the spire is completely enveloped by the body whorl, ii) the shell is thickened mainly internally, but also externally, with layers of differing crystalline structure, iii) the ribs form teeth along both sides of the narrowed aperture and along inhalant and exhalant siphonal canals, iv) ribs and grooves complete formation ventrally and dorsally on the body-whorl.

G) adult: 1Tm flic.kr/p/CEqony

Shell development is completed with deposition dorsally by the extended mantle of a thin, outermost pinkish layer, mainly in the grooves 3Tm flic.kr/p/BSsv7u Ventrally, the shell remains white. For short time until three blotches of pitch-brown/black pigment are deposited on the dorsum of the shell it may resemble T. arctica.

 

Body description

Morphologically, apart from reproductive organs, the soft body parts are similar on adults and post-veliger juveniles, but pigmentation is paler and pattern differs on juveniles.

The flattened head is flanked by stout eye-peduncles fused to the bases of the cephalic tentacles. On adults it is red-brown, red, orange or sulphur-yellow, sometimes with yellow spots. On juveniles it is whitish. It can open-wide 12Tm flic.kr/p/CPXZXi or fold-shut 13Tm flic.kr/p/CPXYNp along the ventral mid-line where there is an unobtrusive, small snout with an opening to a pouch containing the feeding proboscis 14Tm flic.kr/p/CGEAQ8 . The cephalic tentacles are long, slender, translucent and the same range of colours as the head, but sometimes a paler shade 15Tm flic.kr/p/CEq61j & 16Tm flic.kr/p/CPXUjp , often with opaque, hyphen-like streaks of yellow or, on juveniles, white.

The long inhalant siphon, a rolled extension of the mantle13Tm flic.kr/p/CPXYNp , is coloured as the head or, often, a stronger shade and sometimes with black flecks flic.kr/p/aaiJPB (D. Cooke). It protrudes, usually held erect, from a short, wide anterior siphonal-canal in the shell; 13Tm flic.kr/p/CPXYNp . An exhalant siphon formed by fold of mantle rests within posterior siphonal canal of the shell 17Tm flic.kr/p/CEq373 & 14Tm flic.kr/p/CGEAQ8 . The much thickened and lobulated, translucent mantle can extend over the entire exterior of the shell 18Tm flic.kr/p/BSzrtH . On adults it is usually whitish ventrally and greyish laterally and dorsally, with dark marks, often merging into lines aligned over the underlying shell-grooves 13Tm flic.kr/p/CPXYNp . The mantle rim usually has an uninterrupted orange border of varying intensity 15Tm flic.kr/p/CEq61j . The hue of the grey areas and dark marks varies between individuals; they may be blue-grey, purple-grey or purple-brown flic.kr/p/bMBBvt (J. Weir) and may be suffused orange. Colour saturation varies between individuals, and on any individual increases with degree of mantle contraction. Specimens from southern locations tend to have more saturated colours, including dark brown. Light yellow or whitish papillae protrude from the mantle 19Tm flic.kr/p/BSzpw6 They vary in number, size and shape and are sometimes absent and sometimes extremely prominent and branched. They are usually more prominent on juveniles 20Tm flic.kr/p/CgsBYc . The mantle on juveniles is translucent, dingy buff-white with fine grey/black particles which coalesce to form spots grouped into dark discs 21Tm flic.kr/p/CMDZUG .

The foot is very extensile 22Tm flic.kr/p/CgszG8 . Its dorsal surface is translucent, pale-yellow, yellow or orange-reddish with many distinct opaque yellow or whitish lines of uniform width 22Tm flic.kr/p/CgszG8 . Lines are absent or few on the peripheral chamfer 19Tm flic.kr/p/BSzpw6 . Juveniles also have distinct opaque lines, but the rest of the foot is almost colourless 21.1Tm flic.kr/p/2dgQKdc & 21Tm flic.kr/p/CMDZUG . The foot anterior is bilaminate and often spread into an axe-head shape. It tapers slightly to a rounded posterior 12Tm flic.kr/p/CPXZXi . The sole is coloured as the dorsum of the foot or paler flic.kr/p/aaiJPB (Duncan Cooke), but without opaque lines 13Tm flic.kr/p/CPXYNp & 23Tm flic.kr/p/CMDWvY . It has a median groove containing a posterior pedal gland 12Tm flic.kr/p/CPXZXi . Unlike most gastropods with single columellar muscle, Trivia has two attached to the columellar region because of the expanded body whorl.

The long, yellow, unipectinate ctenidium and a shorter yellow bipectinate osphradium with larger lamellae are sometimes indistinctly visible in the mantle cavity through the translucent shell of juveniles 24Tm flic.kr/p/BSs3ay . A long, filiform, cylindrical, sickle-shape penis arises behind and below the right tentacle on males.

 

Key identification features

Trivia monacha

1) Adult shell has three pitch-brown/black dorsal marks 4Tm flic.kr/p/BSstYs . (Similar marks on extended mantle of T. arctica 25Tm flic.kr/p/CGEkHz often mistaken for them.)

2)The dorsal surface of the foot of T. monacha at all stages is covered by a network of opaque yellow or white lines 22Tm flic.kr/p/CgszG8 . * Most reliable diagnostic feature.

3) Juveniles with smooth white shells 05Tm flic.kr/p/BSzH7X cannot be differentiated from T. arctica, unless the dorsal surface of the foot is covered by a network of white or yellow lines 21Tm flic.kr/p/CMDZUG .

4) Final stage juveniles of both T. arctica and T. monacha have adult-like ribs but are white and lack pigment blotches. T. monacha can be identified by the dorsal surface of the foot having a network of lines or by the dorsal misalignment of some shell ribs from left and right sides 04.2Tm flic.kr/p/2pog9zY & 04.1Tm flic.kr/p/2nuUyie . The same applies to bleached dead adult shells.

5) Extended mantle of T. monacha is varied but usually has an unbroken orange border at the edge not accompanied three large pitch-brown/black blotches on the mantle 15Tm flic.kr/p/CEq61j .

6) Filiform, cylindrical penis on males (Lebour, 1933).

7) Veliger larvae have almost black intestines and stomach, and a dark digestive gland. Late stage veligers have a slight lateral bay in the vela, but insufficient to change them into four long thin lobes 26Tm flic.kr/p/BSzfyr (Lebour, 1933).

8) 3.5mm (and larger) post-veliger juveniles have orange or bright yellow soft parts 8Tm flic.kr/p/CEqegY , and grey/black particles which coalesce to form spots grouped into dark discs scattered over the mantle 21Tm flic.kr/p/CMDZUG (Lebour, 1931 & 1933).

9) Egg capsules with orange eggs are embedded in compound ascidian with the neck projecting from the surface, April to September in southern England 29Tm flic.kr/p/BSzbSZ

 

Similar species

Trivia arctica (Pulteney, 1799)

1). Adult pink shell has no pitch-brown/black dorsal marks 27Tm flic.kr/p/Cgstva but dark dorsal blotches on rim of fully extended mantle of adult T. arctica are often confused with marks on shell of T. monacha.

2) The translucent whitish to yellowish or reddish orange dorsal surface of the foot of T. arctica often has a few irregular opaque marks, but is not covered by a network of opaque yellow or white lines 25Tm flic.kr/p/CGEkHz . * Most reliable diagnostic feature.

3) Post veliger juvenile T. arctica with smooth white shells 25.1Tm flic.kr/p/2poyg11 cannot be differentiated from juvenile T. monacha, unless the dorsal surface of the foot is seen to be not covered by a network of white or yellow lines.

4) Final stage juveniles of both T. arctica and T. monacha have adult-like ribs but are white and lack pigment blotches 25.2Tm flic.kr/p/2pos63i . T. arctica can be identified by the dorsal surface of the foot lacking a network of lines, or by the perfect dorsal alignment dorsally of the shell ribs from left and right sides 04.1Tm flic.kr/p/2nuUyie . The same applies to bleached dead adult shells.

5) Extended mantle of T. arctica has pitch-brown/black dorsal marks, varying in size and number, but often three, where edges meet 25Tm flic.kr/p/CGEkHz . Juvenile has grey/black particles that do not coalesce to form dark discs elsewhere on mantle. (Lebour, 1933).

6) Large flat leaf-like penis on males of T. arctica (Lebour, 1933).

7) Veliger larvae of T. arctica have yellowish intestines, and very little dark pigment on sides of stomach; always has less pigment than T.monacha larvae. Late stage veligers have velum of four long lobes 26Tm flic.kr/p/BSzfyr .

8) 3.5 mm post-veliger juveniles of T. arctica have yellowish (not orange or bright yellow) soft-parts with minute dispersed blackish-purple spots on exposed mantle, not congregated into disc-shaped groups (Lebour, 1933).

9 Transparent egg capsules of T. arctica, unknown until 2017, are embedded in compound ascidian with neck projecting from surface 29Tm flic.kr/p/BSzbSZ , veligers in plankton from January to May in southern England.

 

Marsenia perspicua (Linnaeus, 1758) 28Tm flic.kr/p/CMDRSu

Inhalant siphon and sometimes roughened surface resemble Trivia.

Mantle halves fused so never retract to expose shell.

Fragile, white, internal, ear-shape shell.

Transparent egg-capsules with white eggs embedded in compound ascidian with lid flush with surface apart from rim 30Tm flic.kr/p/CGEfeZ

  

Simnia patula (Pennant, 1777) 30.1Tm flic.kr/p/2poBvEJ

Juvenile shells of T. monacha might be mistaken for S. patula.

Shell drawn out into anterior and posterior siphonal canals.

Two sides of exterior mantle meet on right side of shell, not along median line.

Mantle white or orange with orange or red transverse lines.

S. patula lives 15-75m deep and not intertidally.

 

Erato voluta (Montagu, 1803) 31Tm flic.kr/p/2nbh6xM

Strong shell, height 10 mm, retains exposed spire throughout life.

Stout inhalent siphon.

Animal narrower at anterior, reflecting the shape of the concealed shell.

White spots on tentacles.

Two sides of dark, papillate mantle meet at dorsal median line, small gap shows white shell.

 

Exotic cowries

Attractive tropical cowries and smaller, duller ones used in school bean-bags and historically used as currency are dropped by humans on beaches and washed up in the Netherlands from historical shipwrecks.

 

Habits and ecology

T. monacha is a southern species reaching its northern limit in Britain. It is usually found near its ascidian prey on hard substrate at LWS and sublittorally in coastal waters but only occasionally in deeper water (Lebour, 1933). It is usually, but not always, the commoner or only Trivia species living on shores. It feeds on Diplosoma listerianum especially var. gelatinosum, the preferred food near Plymouth (Lebour, 1933). It also eats Polyclinum aurantium, the preferred food in Brittany (Pelseneer, 1926), Botryllus schlosseri, especially the yellow and orange forms, Trididemnum and Botrylloides leachi.

T. monacha examines the surface of ascidians with its inhalant siphon and, from a pouch in the head 14Tm flic.kr/p/CGEAQ8 , extends a proboscis containing the radula and jaws to cut through the test to access the zooid. Test and zooid are ingested. Fragments of the indigestible test are voided in faecal rods or pellets. The prey ingested in a feeding session can be up to 50% of the Trivia's volume. Disc-shape dark blotches on the mantles of juveniles have a marked resemblance to the surface of some compound ascidians 24Tm flic.kr/p/BSs3ay .

The bilaminate anterior of the foot contains the anterior pedal gland which produces mucus to aid locomotion 23Tm flic.kr/p/CMDWvY and the posterior pedal gland in the sole also produces mucus to assist movement. There are many other glands in the sole and mantle which exude a variety of secretions which are not all mucal, and probably some are repugnatory.

For respiration, water is taken in through a long inhalant siphon projecting from the anterior siphonal canal of shell. It passes into the mantle cavity 12Tm flic.kr/p/CPXZXi where an osphradium tests the water quality before it passes through the ctenidium. Water leaves via the exhalant siphon 14Tm flic.kr/p/CGEAQ8 in the posterior siphonal canal. Breeding near Plymouth is in late spring and summer. The female is fertilized internally by the long, filiform, cylindrical penis of the male. The broad mantle cavity enables passage of large egg capsules 12Tm flic.kr/p/CPXZXi . The capsule is a 3 mm diameter spherical flask with a 2 mm high funnel shaped neck which is plugged at the base. It is inserted in hole bitten into a compound ascidian with the upper half of the neck protruding 29Tm flic.kr/p/BSzbSZ & 30Tm flic.kr/p/CGEfeZ . The extended ventral pedal gland of the female drives the capsule into the bitten cavity and gives final shape to funnel. There are about 800 yellow-orange ova in each capsule. Its echinospira larvae are found in coastal plankton from April to September (Fretter & Graham, 1962). The larvae have two lobes (vela), each with a slight lateral bay but insufficient to be regarded as a four-lobed larva 26Tm flic.kr/p/BSzfyr . The echinospira larva has double shell. The exterior shell is flimsy, transparent, colourless and shiny. Fretter & Graham (1962) interpreted it as a periostracum layer separated from the calcareous shell. The gap between shells is filled with seawater. This decreases the specific gravity of the veliger to near-neutral buoyancy, and the increased surface area slows the rate of sinking, so easing the effort needed to orientate and maintain position in the water column (McCloskey, 1972). The inner calcareous shell contains the larval animal. Though T. monacha has larger adults than T. arctica its larvae are smaller at equivalent stages and its vela are less developed probably because it is more coastal and needs less power to maintain position in the water column. At metamorphosis the larval operculum and outer shell/periostracum are shed and the mantle spreads over the exterior of the inner shell. “The number of old [adult] shells taken surprisingly exceeds that of the young.” (Forbes & Hanley, 1853); this might be explained by poor survival of thin, fragile, dead juvenile shells on strandlines, but live juveniles are much rarer than live adults on suitable shores, although, when present, several may be found at the same location. Divers seem to see juveniles more often. Juveniles assume the adult form about six months after metamorphosis. (See “Post-veliger shell development” section, above).

Distribution and status

Live T. monacha are found from Shetland and Normandy to Gibraltar and the western Mediterranean. Some dead shells have been found offshore in Dutch and German waters and worn fossil or strandline shells have been recorded in the Netherlands, but these probably originate from distant times or places . GBIF map www.gbif.org/species/5192813 . It lives on hard substrate all round Britain and Ireland, except it is absent or scarce in the north-east Irish Sea, from Flamborough Head to Kent and much of the east coast of Scotland. U.K. map NBN species.nbnatlas.org/species/NBNSYS0000178459

Acknowledgements

For specimens and/or use of images I gratefully thank Maëlan Adam, Jim Anderson, Karen Boswarva, Pierre Corbrion, Dick Hoeksema, Jan Light, Paula Lightfoot, Joanne Porter, Sankurie Pye, Chris Rickard, Ana Rodrigues and Stefan Verheyen.

 

Links and references

Browne, E.T. 1898. On keeping medusae alive in an aquarium. J. Mar. Biol. Ass. 5 (2): 176-180. [Description of “plunger jar” used by Lebour to rear Trivia] plymsea.ac.uk/192/

 

Forbes, E. & Hanley S. 1849-53. A history of the British mollusca and their shells. vol. 3 (1853), London, van Voorst. (As Cypræa europæa [agg.] ; pp. 495-497. archive.org/stream/ahistorybritish05forbgoog#page/n508/mo...

 

Fretter, V. and Graham, A. 1962. British prosobranch molluscs. London, Ray Society.

 

Fretter, V. and Graham, A. 1981. The prosobranch molluscs of Britain and Denmark. Part 6 – Cerithiacea, Strombacea, Hipponicacea, Calyptraeacea, Lamellariacea, Cypraeacea, Naticacea, Tonnacea, Heteropoda. J. Moll. Stud. Suppl. 9: 285-363.

 

Graham, A. 1988. Prosobranch and pyramidellid gastropods. London.

 

Høisæter, T. 2009. Distribution of marine, benthic, shell bearing gastropods along the Norwegian coast. Fauna norvegica 28: 5-106.

www.ntnu.no/ojs/index.php/fauna_norvegica/article/view/563

 

Jeffreys, J.G. 1862-69. British conchology. vol. 4 (186). London, van Voorst. (As Cypræa europæa [agg.];

archive.org/stream/britishconcholog04jeff#page/402/mode/2up

 

Lebour, M.V. 1931. The larval stages of Trivia europea. J. Mar. Biol. Ass. 17(3): 819-832. [Aggregate species, but nearly all details are of T. monacha.] plymsea.ac.uk/698/

 

Lebour, M.V. 1933. The British species of Trivia: T. arctica and T. monacha. J. Mar. Biol. Ass. 18(2): 477-484.

plymsea.ac.uk/782/

 

McCloskey, L.R. 1972. Development and ecological aspects of the echinospira shell of Lamellaria rhombica Dall (Prosobranchia; Mesogastropoda). Ophelia 10 (2): 155-168.

www.tandfonline.com/doi/abs/10.1080/00785326.1972.10430111

 

McKay, D. & Smith, S.M. 1979. Marine mollusca of East Scotland. Royal Scottish Museum, Edinburgh.

 

Meyer, C. & Paulay, G. 2005. Shell microstructure. Cowrie Genetic Database Project, Florida Museum of Natural History.

www.flmnh.ufl.edu/cowries/microstructure.html

 

Pelseneer, P. 1926. Note d'embryologie malacologique. Ponte et développement de Cypræa europea, etc. Bull. Biol. de la France et de la Belgique 60 (1): 88-112. [Cited in Lebour, 1933, as having mistakenly interchanged descriptions of penes of T. monacha and T. arctica]

 

Pelseneer, P. 1932. La métamorphose préadulte des Cypræidæ. Bull. Biol. de la France et de la Belgique 66 (2): 149-163. [Cited in Lebour, 1933, as having corrected mistaken interchange made in 1926 of descriptions of penes of T. monacha and T. arctica]

 

Van Nieulande, F.A.D., Hoeksema, D.F., Nijhuis, H.W. & Rijken, A.C. 2022. De fossiele schelpen van de Nederlandse kust II, deel 17. Velutinidae, Triviidae, Eratoidae en Ovulidae Spirula 431: 16 – 25. www.researchgate.net/publication/360897905_De_fossiele_sc...

 

Ziegelmeier, E. 1966. Die Schnecken(Gastropoda Prosobranchia) der deutschen Meeresgebiete und brackigen Küstengewässer. Helgolander Wiss. Meeresunters 13, 1–61 hmr.biomedcentral.com/articles/10.1007/bf01612655

 

Current taxonomy: World Register of Marine Species (WoRMS) www.marinespecies.org/aphia.php?p=taxdetails&id=141744

  

Glossary

adapical = towards the apex of the shell.

aperture = mouth of gastropod shell; outlet for head and foot.

bipectinate = like feather with central axis and series of filaments or lamellae on either side.

 

cephalic = (adj.) of or on the head.

columella = “little column” around which gastropod shell spirals.

columellar = (adj.) of or near central axis of spiral gastropod.

columellar lip = lower (abapical) part of inner lip of aperture.

convolute = (adj.) last whorl of gastropod-shell envelopes and conceals all earlier whorls e.g. Trivia and Simnia.

 

echinospira = special form of drifting larva with an inner and outer shell.

epizooic = (adj.) of non-parasitic organisms living on surface of animals.

epizooid = (n.) non-parasitic organism living on surface of animal.

ctenidium = comb-like molluscan gill; usually an axis with a row of filaments or lamellae on one or two sides.

 

ELWS = extreme low water spring tide (usually near March and September equinoxes).

 

height = (of gastropod shells) distance from apex of spire to base of aperture, but, as apex concealed, the longest dimension on Trivia.

 

labial varix = especially strong or broad costa (rib) along or near outer lip of aperture.

 

mantle = sheet of tissue which secretes the shell and forms a cavity for the gill in most marine molluscs. Confined to the shell-interior of most British shelled-gastropods, but can cover exterior also on Trivia.

 

operculum = plate of horny conchiolin used to close shell aperture. Absent from Trivia.

 

osphradium = organ for testing water quality (chemical and/or for particles) usually near ctenidium (gill).

 

papilla = (pl. papillae) small cone-shaped protrusion of flesh.

papillate = covered in papillae.

periostracum = thin horny layer of chitinous material often coating shells.

plankton = animals and plants which drift in pelagic zone (main body of water).

suture = groove or line where whorls of gastropod shell adjoin.

test = (of ascidian) outer cellulose sheath containing zooid.

umbilicus = cavity up axis of some gastropods, open as a hole or chink on base of shell, often sealed over.

 

unipectinate = with axis and series of filaments or lamellae on one side.

veliger = shelled larva of marine gastropod or bivalve mollusc which swims by beating cilia of a velum (bilobed flap).

  

Dylain Nikita

Class of 1998

Most likely to run off with the circus

 

Yearbook Smile Challenge

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I'm having a good-hair, bad-skin day. :p

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