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© Leanne Boulton, All Rights Reserved
Some kind of landscape photography I think. Captured in April 2023 at Troon South Beach, Scotland.
There are 3 vital things that someone with severe CPTSD needs in order to function and heal.
1/ Consistency, predictability and routine.
2/ A place of safety and comfort
3/ Patience and compassion
Without these my trauma response is activated. I can't help that, it is physiological.
These needs have not been fully met for the past 2 years or so. Is it any wonder my symptoms have worsened? Now I am blamed for not healing fast enough. 25 years of abuse and PTSD cannot be fixed with 1 year of therapy and just one year of healing afterwards, least of all when those needs are not fully met. I didn't stand a chance.
Last night a friend from the past messaged me at a critical time. They chatted with me online for some 2 hours or more. They actually made me cry, smile and even laugh. It saved The Samaritans a call and that friend may have saved my life. The timing was impeccable.
The biggest threat to me is not having the 3 vital things. Without those I will spiral into hell. There is no chance I can heal without them. I just don't know where I can get them now. I can't do this alone and I will need actual in-person physical help as well. At my worst I am unable to even cook a meal or even answer the door. At times I could not even leave the house into the garden.
At my best there are little nuggets of the old 'Leanne' there. I just can't find her by myself. I am too ill to do it all alone now.
For the friend that contacted me last night. I am in their debt.
I am trying to post to Flickr and enjoy your photography to maintain routine. It has helped to hold me together for a long time. I am struggling to comment on other people's work or find 'happy' photographs to share. I hope I can get back there though.
In the meantime. Thank you for your understanding and caring. However remote, it does help. It does help.
If you are going to favorite my pictures it would be nice if you left a comment letting me know why you like my photo.
Vacation Day / Social Distancing Day 359, 03/07/2021, Miami, FL
Panasonic DMC-G2
LEICA DG SUMMILUX 25/F1.4
Æ’/5.6 25.0 mm 1/1600 100
Instagram in B&W Only | wheremyrunningshoestakeme | Instagram in Color | Lens Wide-Open
Winter Party Festival . Beach Party . www.WinterParty.org . South Beach Miami, Florida . Sunday afternoon, 04 March 2007 . elvertbarnes-freedom.blogspot.com/2008/02/winter-party-fe... . Elvert Xavier Barnes Photography
If you're gonna go to the beach, be sure to wear a hat of some kind - the heat can be harsh. These cowboy hats go great with bikinis.