When we look, when we listen, & when we heed the messages we receive, the little{-&-big} feedback loops that are all around {{{willing to re-assess, re-calibrate, & re-curve our path & our approaches with true humility & re-consideration}}} we rebirth our-selves a thousand~||~million~||~bazillion times over.. Like a Firebird Phoenix from ash to sky to ash ~ & on up, again ::: pure, fierce-loving Fire of rebirth & innate wholeness..

👂📡👐➰💭〰🙏💫🔥🐤🆙🆙🆙🗾🔃👂..

{{in the Waning Moon (now in joyful-Fire Aries), thank you, Universe & Sunshine & Prismatic Reflection, for this glittery yet mundane-magic reminder ~ *& don't worry, I asked, ok w/a 'No', & its sacredness did want to be shared here on the Interwebs, where all forever remains that is ever shared* (bc not all do)}} 🌌🔦🌞💎👥

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@my_my_magic {personal account of Mai Mai, keeper/tender of Sacred Hearth Assembly}

Words / design & design-concept / image ©Sacred Hearth Assembly. All rights reserved.✨

The ember of salvation amidst the darkness. — Maria C Dawson

I've decided to start a 52 week challenge. We'll see how far I get! :D

One of my New Year's resolutions was to be as happy as I can all the time.

So, on January 2nd, I decided I would start a list, and write one or two new things that made me happy on it every day. That way by the end of the year, or just whenever I'm feeling sad, I can look at my list and always find a reason to be happy.

I was going pretty strong and had a half page within a couple days, but 5 or 6 days later it became too hard for me to think of anything new.

I guess that's just how it goes when your heart is breaking.

For now I've left the list and I'm happy just by going on with life, surrounding myself with friends and family, and trying my best to let go.

It can be the hardest thing in the world sometimes.

Hopefully I'm making the right choice.

So, I took a little spur-of-the-moment road trip on Sunday. Just by myself. I do my second best thinking driving alone on long stretches of road. I do my best thinking in the shower, but the hot water doesn't last as long as the road to nowhere.

Earlier, I had explored an abandoned barn that I found and was heading down a mostly-dirt road to see what I could discover before I lost the light completely.

After taking this shot , I continued down the road and nearly passed by this farm with several calves standing in the field. It took a couple of seconds to register in my brain that this calf was standing so perfectly posed, staring out of the fence. I slammed on my brakes and threw the car in reverse, grabbed my camera, rolled down the window and took a few shots.

The calf never moved the whole time. When I was finished, it mooed. I said "thank you" and continued on my way.

365 Project Day 5

My husband Jon and I have always thought our oldest daughter, Allison, would be the kind of girl who leaves home as quickly as she can possibly afford it. Not that she wants to get away from us, but she’s always been an independent, free spirit-type personality, and we saw that in her from a young age. Lots of wing-spreading and experiencing life to do, you know.

She’s 18, in college, and living with Jon’s dad right now, who lives about a half hour from us. Any mother who has had a child leave home, whether on a temporary or permanent basis, knows how hard that letting go process can be. Painful at times.

Today, I was doing laundry, and found one of Allison’s shirts jammed under the side of the washing machine, so I washed and dried it, then went in her vacant bedroom to put it on her shelf for when she comes home for Christmas. I put the shirt away, then looked over at her bed, pushed up tight against the wall.

At some point within the last year or two, she got out her Sharpies and wrote these three Bible verses on her wall, next to her bed—right where her head would be on the pillow.

Yep, she’s officially a grown-up and still writes on her walls.

I remember the day I first saw it. I was like, What do you think you’re doing? …but I couldn’t bring myself to say much more than that. That was the extent of the “talking-to”, and I let it go. I felt like I couldn’t really tell her how “nice” it looked or anything, so what a dilemma to be in, right? I let her know I wasn’t exactly thrilled that she wrote on her wall, but on the inside, it really made me happy. One of those quiet joys as a momma.

When I looked at her wall again today, as her Dr. Suess stuffed animals sat staring at me, I wondered if I will ever want to paint over those words. The thought of knowing that the Word of God was that important to her in her late teens and into adulthood—that she made sure it was the last thing she saw before going to sleep at night is simply beautiful to me. It’s not written in a fancy font or done with a stencil, but written in her everyday handwriting, which makes it even more beautiful to me.

Proverbs 22:6 ~ Train up a child in the way he should go, and when he is old he will not depart from it.

First Draft by Julie Larson

After seriously considering Mr. Sable™'s suggestion to keep this Bombay Bowler pith helmetaround as a display piece, I decided, instead, to send it into the Great Beyond in a suitably dramatic and adventurous fashion.

In addition to not fitting my head and being damaged, this hat carried with it a bit of mental-emotional "baggage," not all of it pleasant. Indeed, very little of it pleasant. Having finally decided it was time to let go of a few things, both physical and metaphysical, I used the opportunity of the winter solstice to symbolically part with a reminder of the past; and I hope, in the process, to take a step toward grander adventures yet to come!

Photo 1 of 3

20 December 2011

When you feel yourself sinking, FAITH keeps you afloat.

8/28/08 - School was worse today. Everyone assigned books and tried getting things in order so the idea of switching classes tomorrow became even more stressful. I didn't get my wisdom teeth taken out and so I will be in class tomorrow and I have to read a lot before tomorrow's test on To Kill A Mockingbird. I'm just very stressed and anxiety seems to have taken ahold of me. I don't think anyone realizes how lost I am at the moment.

I need someone to hold me and let me feel their warmth. This house has been so cold lately...

Thank you all for your support, though. Even if you don't understand you're being hopeful and sweet and it's done a lot for me. <3

View On Black <-- much better

"Consider them convinced: I'm a lunatic, eyes are wide and crazed. I'm feeling hell bent on wreaking havok." - Hit The Lights.

"Security is when everything is settled. When nothing can happen to you. Security is the denial of life."

~ Germaine Greer

Thank you if you have been following this story through images. This is the last of a series of 8. Please see image 1 for the story behind the images.

Life is full of twists and turns, highs and lows... you can never be certain of what tomorrow holds. We all go through challenging times and sometimes we feel hopeless and defeated... this is normal... accept it. But always know that you are never alone. Have the courage to stand tall... open your heart... embrace life... the light will always guide you home. Thank you my friends... God bless.

"Courage is not the absence of fear, but rather the judgment that something else is more important than fear."

~ Ambrose Redmoon

Long exposure of mosquitos on 4x5.

It's an alternative take on 'Letting Go'

Bikini Lines is a contest to create & document the world's largest painting for the benefit of children orphaned in the March 2011 Japanese disasters, and this is one of my submissions. Find out posting rules & much, much more at www.bikinilines.net

After seriously considering Mr. Sable™'s suggestion to keep this Bombay Bowler pith helmetaround as a display piece, I decided, instead, to send it into the Great Beyond in a suitably dramatic and adventurous fashion.

In addition to not fitting my head and being damaged, this hat carried with it a bit of mental-emotional "baggage," not all of it pleasant. Indeed, very little of it pleasant. Having finally decided it was time to let go of a few things, both physical and metaphysical, I used the opportunity of the winter solstice to symbolically part with a reminder of the past; and I hope, in the process, to take a step toward grander adventures yet to come!

Photo 3 of 3

20 December 2011

The real hair that grew after chemo

I got a massage the other day, and discovered that I was just one big, tall ball of knots. I'm someone who believes that many of these knots (and lots of people's other body ailments for that matter) are the physical manifestations of the crap that we subject ourselves to or haven’t dealt with. Take that for what it's worth. The science may not be there, but the metaphor seems to hold more than symbolic meaning. Anyway, I knew why many of those knots were there, what I was holding in, and as they were released I experienced some surprisingly strong emotions associated with them. And then… feeling looser and more relaxed, I felt like I'd gotten past them. Pretty fascinating really.

Letting go looks kinda cool large on black.

I can still see the light at the end of the tunnel shine

Through the dark times even when I lose my mind

But it feels like no one in the world is listening

And I can't ever seem to make the right decisions

Then I'ma sit back and wait until the next sunrise...

~ P.O.D., "Goodbye For Now"

Listen here

Week 10

Sometimes it’s all it takes, letting go of things that weight us down, things that can’t happen.

A personal and intricate feeling that we return to in so many moments of our lives. As deep or as shallow as letting go of something might be, they are always necessary.

This week i ended up letting go of a bigger picture i had envisioned for this theme. Sometimes one has to do it, as hard as it may be.

_______

We're six friends, photographers, creating an annual project through 52 weeks. If you want to join us in this adventure please use the hashtag #52sisterhoodproject and create a self-portrait around this week's theme. We can't wait to see everything!

Sometimes that side of me comes out and I just got to let it go.

Today I am 40 years old. A milestone like that brings out a lot of feelings. Who am I? How the hell did I get to where I am today? Where do I go from here? My new project will attempt to answer that. This series, Childhood Memories, will consist of the places, people, and events from my life that have made me who I am. I am doing this for self discovery. I hope other people enjoy it too, but it will be fine if they don't. I decided to make this photo the first one in the series. From there I will post with no set schedule and in no particular order. More like "stream of consciousness" as things come to me.

So this is where it all began for me. My grandparent's home. My home from the time I was 2 years old until I finally got my own place with friends at 23. Even then, this was still home. I haven't lived here for nearly 20 years, but it is still home. We lost grandpa back in 2003, but his presence is still here.

Grandma is alone now in this house full of memories. After 63 years here, she says she must leave. My aunt (her daughter) and uncle have made her an offer she can't refuse, to live with them. She will be cared for, close to family, life simplified. A house is just a material thing. I understand. Still letting go is so hard. The two most important people in my life, giants in my eyes, my heroes, the greatest of the greatest generation - my grandparents took this house, this mere material thing and turned it into the greatest home anyone could ever hope to live in. My father, aunt, and uncles were all raised here. Then I came along. Barely two years old, given a second chance to have a normal childhood by grandparents nearing retirement who had already raised four children. My childhood was epic, the stuff of legend because of them.

I have told my family that I will never set foot in my hometown again. They say "aww, you don't mean that". I do. I cannot bear to see another family living in our home. Grandma says, "don't you want to see what the new owners do with the place?" No! I want to remember it just how it is. Nothing anyone can do to it could make it better. They can only mess it up. I am so lucky to still have my grandmother and I will be glad to have her near me and well taken care of, but I just want this painful transitional period over with. I guess I'm just too sentimental.

In the spirit of full disclosure. I hereby renounce my youthful lameness and I promise never to be young and clueless again.

"Old and out of it" is a whole different proposition, though.

______

England 2010

in lightbox please

+ more in comments

_____

tumblr | formspring | life of photographs

6/7

Letting go is always hard. I'm not sure I will ever be able to fully let go... and maybe in a way that's not so bad. The part I need to let go is the hurt and the pain, I need to do that for myself, and I will... someday.

Please don't use my images without permission! Send me a note if you're interested I'll be happy to work something out.

FORTITUDE. Fear is a parasite capable of devouring your emotional resources until barren; no outcome will ever be as torturous as its voracious appetite. Confront uncertainty with courage–the most effective antidote within your control.

After seriously considering Mr. Sable™'s suggestion to keep this Bombay Bowler pith helmetaround as a display piece, I decided, instead, to send it into the Great Beyond in a suitably dramatic and adventurous fashion.

In addition to not fitting my head and being damaged, this hat carried with it a bit of mental-emotional "baggage," not all of it pleasant. Indeed, very little of it pleasant. Having finally decided it was time to let go of a few things, both physical and metaphysical, I used the opportunity of the winter solstice to symbolically part with a reminder of the past; and I hope, in the process, to take a step toward grander adventures yet to come!

Photo 2 of 3

20 December 2011

Each life experience influences the next. Only YOU have the power to change your pattern. — Maria C Dawson

It's about time I do this. And, yes. This is a really good thing :)

100 photos challenge | 57. sacrifice

.

sometimes you have to make sacrifices to get what you need

i wanted to portray a form of self sacrifice. whether it's sacrificing your possessions, hiding your emotions, or maybe even changing your current situation. sometimes we think that something we could never live without becomes something we need to set free.

more on facebook

When everything around you feels cold and unwelcoming, share the warmth of your soul with others.

To often we place on a word to much baggage. The term "God" for instance... when you ask someone if they believe in God? What does does it mean, if my image of God is different then their image. So many words in my vocabulary have been loaded with so much baggage. What I say...people will miss understand because they do not have my baggage. To often I'm miss understood.

/****************

To often we consider something "worthless" such as a neighbors weedy yard.

This picture shows us that there can be beauty in that which the majority reject. I try to look past my "trusty emotions" and see the reality in front of me. I'm not confessing to be a pro at this...but I do see beauty in this photo, which is evidence to me that I'm not "normal" in the general scheme of things.

/***********************************************

Dawn, and the first frost. They are led in silence down a winding path, a creek, houses and city on their right and marsh, grass and field on their left. An apron is tied around a tree, and there they veer left, out into the frozen turf.

Hummocks dot the landscape, and cattails ring the edge marking the boundary. They start to notice teacups full of ice and ash, placed on lumps of grass that look like heads. Then, the people. They are three, around a table set for eight. The cups, the china, the cattails, all are sparkling white in the morning frost. The trio of figures strikes a stark contrast in all black. Top hats, veils, long coats and dresses, they sit in silence. Slowly, the man standing between two women turns and pours from a teapot water speckled with ash into one, then the other's cup. When she receives the drink, each woman in turn gently pours the contents of her cup onto the ground, and returns for another. Overtime, the water turns to silt, then mud. Overhead, the ravens speak.

The teapot is placed on the table, the cups in their saucers. The women rise and all three draw small black books up into their hands. They sing:

And am I born to die

To lay this body down

And must my trembling spirit fly

Into a world unknown

Must then my portion be

The three return their books to their places, return their cups and teapots to their hands, and continue their silent tea. The water is long gone, but the pouring does not end. The crows cry Mercy.

Performed by E.M. Briddick, J.T. Burling, and A.H. Richardson

4 November 2011

Photo by Jeff Casey

Hymn "And Am I Born to Die?" by Charles Wesley, 1793

Bikini Lines is a contest to create & document the world's largest painting for the benefit of children orphaned in the March 2011 Japanese disasters, and this is one of my submissions. Find out posting rules & much, much more at www.bikinilines.net

Beautiful autumn abounds here. The sky's a beautiful, cloudless blue!

I am looking for humorous quotes, for my friends who love quotes out there in Flickrland ... please email them!

This quote, a favorite from my youth, held particular meaning this past two seasons: Watching family and friends endure (and in three cases, succumb to) serious illnesses has been a challenge on many levels. This quote's full of truth. A reminder to be patient in life for what growth comes from challenges, it's full of hope and promise too.

Many friends have inspired me as they face their challenges.

Part of my own solution is to cherish and fuel my mind with the beautiful and fun times around me. Everyday I photograph something beautiful and feel grateful for both the people and the passing moments, too. This mindfulness reshapes the days.

Seeing this beautiful oak tree against this bright , clear blue sky yesterday was such a pleasure! Today, I wanted to share it with all of you.

Celebrate EACH day!

HAPPY BLUE (and orange) Monday!

"Nighty"

nightshooter09

The time has come and I'm getting rid of my CDs (though I'm not quite sure if I wasn't to part with my Dylan collection just yet). They haven't been used in years and they're just taking up space. Not sure what I'm going to do with them, though; charity shops will end up with most but I'm also going to try and flog some too if I can. Some of the jazz discs in particular might be worth a few bob, but maybe no. I'm trying not to focus on how much I've spent on CDs in the past, but I've had a lot of enjoyment from them and I've still got the music in electronic files. It feels right to let them go now but hopefully others will end up getting the same please I got from them.

Hi dear flickr friends...

I am swamped with tending to the small, and not so small, things of life right now. I am trying to surrender and not fret that I am not able to keep up with photos and comments much, but it's so hard! You all are such a wonderful part of my days...xoxo ~ A.

This photograph has its roots in a quote from Carl Jung, "Embrace your grief. For there, your soul will grow."

Sharon was grieving the loss of her partner who had died in a pane crash a year prior to this photograph being taken. Our intent for this shoot was to offer her the opportunity to move with and through her grief.

Sharon danced, she cried, and screamed. It was an honor to be present for her powerful expression and release. This experience offered me a deep stirring and movement into my own grief.

www.photographyfortheuninhibited.com

Sometimes, choosing the RIGHT path isn't as obvious as it seems. It's never too late to change your direction.

“The beginning of love is to let those we love be perfectly themselves, and not to twist them to fit our own image. Otherwise we love only the reflection of ourselves we find in them.”

For those who don't know yet...I have not migrated to Seattle....Many of you noticed and commented about my change of photography and self when I was in Florida....It is now where I call HOME...after an epic 27 hour ride!!!!!!! Yes...straight through....I just don't know how I did it...But I am here...beginning life again..It is here that I have found bits of myself back....feeling at peace...singing to the ocean...worshiping the sun...sharing all of myself with old time friends....laughing from the gut...breathing instead of sighing...and remembering just how much I love the world, people and just life in all its' glory...I will catch up with you all soon! xoxo

OH YEAH...and most importantly..No more fucking SNOW!!!

youtu.be/pVSx-OZWC_A

but I rather go mad than refuse myself to experience the power of weakness

Bikini Lines is a contest to create & document the world's largest painting for the benefit of children orphaned in the March 2011 Japanese disasters, and this is one of my submissions. Find out posting rules & much, much more at www.bikinilines.net

just editing some more of these for the remainder of this project. We'd really like to find some way to get these images out there to provide inspiration and strength to others who find themselves faced with this incredibly difficult process of fighting cancer. Debbie is so inspiring......

www.flickr.com/photos/debsgreatadventure/

blogged:

www.kristihedbergphotography.com/blog/