View allAll Photos Tagged GroupTherapy
Loren Thacker, see loren.myportfolio.com/grouptherapy
Lighting: Lighting: Tony Oliver @tony_and_dave_cosplay
Painted @ the Farm Pub as part of our 'Group Therapy Show'...
In attendance on the day - Boswell, Pen, Lokey, Sez & Shab...
Big ups to Shabs on photo duty...
Group Therapy - Field Trip...
Boswell, Lokey, Cage One, Andy Council & Rowdy
Big shout outs to Wayne our carer/coach driver today !...
EDIT: Made it to Explore!!! #255.. My First!!! .. Thanks guys!!
.. and then disappeared :( Got a screenshot though.. My one hour of fame.. heh..
Highest position: 177 on Tuesday, November 4, 2008
Wonder why there wasnt a white colored pencil in the set. Been ages I bought any colors for myself. Well, now that I started, the collection would only grow :D
One of the pencils fell down while taking this :(. You can tell which.
Unwellcome Relatives Group Therapy field trip ... Unfortunately not everyone handed in their permission slips so it was just Lokey, Boswell & Andy Council this time
I've debated over posting this, much less admitting that I'm reading a book with god in the title. I'm not religious by any means nor do I plan to limit or commit myself to any deity in the near future (so prepare a bag of popcorn if you care to read any further, this may or may not be a long read).
So last week when I had the look of relief after a very cruddy week. It's cause I went to a support group for depression . . . that was run out of a church. I had a great amount of inner turmoil and debate going on within myself for resorting to asking for help there . . . of all places. After all, what good has prayer ever done for me. I'm the only one that has the will and ability to make change in my life, nobody but me. (getting off topic though, I'm not here to preach, judge or choose sides)
I came to the conclusion, (deep inhale) that depression knows no barriers and affects anyone without bias, so who am I to judge where or who helps me. At this point in the way I am and have been feeling, I couldn't afford to turn down any assistance or dictate HOW or WHERE my help comes from.
So I walked into the support group, I was a cluster of knots and feelings, an emotional train wreck, and on the verge of falling apart. I wanted to kick something and squirrels just weren't doing the trick. Anything and everything would set me into crying convulsions and if someone happened to ask what was wrong, I blamed allergies and like the true manic I am, would manage a fake smile and talk about anything to change the subject to draw away attention from my craziness. Tuesday was not that way though. I'd get that look, you know the one, that look that says they know you're lying but they're too scared or don't care enough to really ask "What's wrong?" because you know they have problems of their own and don't have the desire to burden themselves with your problems too. Tuesday was yet another panic attack. That's three in less than a month.
I haven't been this bad since during my divorce. Sometimes I just want to sit there alone and write out everything that's wrong and just mouth off, but I can't write that fast.
So I walk from the parking lot, thru the glass doors of the church, thru the hallways and into the meeting room. There are a group of women of various ages and a couple of men. I take a seat and prepare to listen. I hope that deep down they don't focus solely on just god and in my mind do the stereo-typical koom-buy-ya holding-hands and hope they know there is more science and chemistry to this than pure faith in something you can't see. I tell myself that even if they do that, to just sit out the meeting and give them a chance.
Because if I don't give them a chance, if I don't try and open my ears and listen, then I've already failed . . . I will have failed in getting myself help.
As I predicted they started off with a prayer and so not stand out I followed their lead and observed the room and listened to what they said. I was a little disappointed and frustrated when they kept pointing to certain pages in this book they passed out referring to prayers and biblical passages when on an opposite page something logical finally caught my attention. It was the phrase, not from the bible but some a famous speaker, along the lines of "hope dispairs and dispair hopes". Then they read aloud the next part, which got a reaction out of me, which by the tile of the book you see, was one of the Psalms.
Now as I said, I'm not religious, so when I had no choice but to go to church as a child I never paid attention (hey, you can make me go, but you can't make me like it), therefore I don't know the lines to the extent of many out there and I definitely don't use them as guidelines to live by in my everyday existence.
There I am, listening to them read this passage aloud . . .a passage that I've heard about all my life (and as they start with 'o lord, I close my eyes and roll them to myself and mumble in my head "blah blah blah") but never cared to listen to when I noticed how the authors mood changes from being tragically down to manically happy all in about twelve lines. Poe, Shakespeare anyone? That actually piqued my interest. So I read it to myself again and shut out the chatter in the room, mentally deleting the religious aspects. When I was done, I saw a light go off. It was like I wrote it, minus the stuff about god.
The speaker asks us as a group to tell us what this means to us or what stood out the most. Everyone had very good answers and observations and you saw heads nodding all around in agreement. When they got to me, I said: This was written by a person that suffers from manic depression, it's like emotions I am experiencing verbatim.
One person in the room agreed with me. The speaker even said that she never thought of it in that respect. I think by me saying that she knew what I was... that I wasn't like them and that I'd be the one here to question and doubt (which wasnt' the case ~ as I said, I can't dictate where my help comes from).
When she looked in my direction as asked the room "Is any of this helping or making sense". Someone else answered for me: "Too soon to tell." Good. I didn't want the attention on me. But as they say, everything is interpreted differently by every one. Even if you ask someone something, sometimes their opinions might change over the course of time. As we all know, we're not the same person we were a year ago.
As they say and I know from first-hand experience, "Life changes in an instant."
The rest of the night I listened and interacted and was thankful when they started focusing on depression rather than passages and scriptures. We brought up coping mechanisms and feelings of guilt and how difficult it was to do simple things like laundry or get out of bed and the pain we feel that we can't describe. We talked about the (and I love this part) how different religions use different forms of exercise to help with the chemical imbalances and how in different parts of the world this illness is perceived and accepted or rejected.
So I took my book home and carried it my purse and tried to read it when I could. So far I am only on chapter 2, but I do notice that the prayers and biblical chapters are few and far between. The author speaks from one that has recovered from and survived depression and the mechanisms in dealing with and living with this illness.
So maybe these church ladies know something after all. As I said before, depression like death, doesn't care who you are. Words are words, knowledge is knowledge, it doesn't matter where it comes from or how you learn something. What matters is what you do with it.
If you really get down to it, god is everywhere ~ like it or not. He's preveilant in my favorite show Heroes, hes mentioned way too often in my favorite band's lyrics Depeche Mode. Even Marilyn Manson mentions being the antichrist superstar and Tool's Maynard refers to some sort of higher power. Don't forget about any science fiction piece ~ they all refer to some unseen supernatural beings and abilities.
So yea, as I've learned long ago. Never say never.
Now for the fine print I'm not here to debate or chose sides. I'm here to learn to live my life with all the options around me, and learn to accept and live with the differences and obstacles that come with my journey. Do your best to accept this. Don't be creepy and harass my commenter's.
A full shot of the band within the band of this show within a show. 'twas a lot of fun. Read my blog entry dated 01/21/2005 to understand what the mur I'm talking about.
UR (Unwellcome Relatives)
Group Therapy - Field Trip...
Boswell, Lokey, Cage One, Andy Council & Rowdy
Big shout outs to Wayne our carer/coach driver today !...
You're welcome to use this image on your website... please link to www.theideadesk.com. Contact chris@iqoncept.com for the non-watermarked version. A group of illustrated 3d people are arranged in a circle around the words Let's Talk to encourage them to share their feelings or emotions on a problem or issue