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i know this is probably something i'll wake up tomorrow wishing i wouldn't have written. but at the same time, feeling better that i did. who knows if i'll end up erasing it all soon.
i cant sleep because there is a lot of weight on my heart. too much for me to close my eyes on.
1. i hate how i am actually really insecure. most of the times.
2. i want so badly to live on my own and start taking care of myself financially. but that would just be such an irresponsible decision right now because i have less than enough to pay my car payments for the next two months. how could i even think about moving out?
3. and more than moving out, i want to go to either Ukraine, Uganda, or Ecuador for missions this summer. but that would require more money than i can imagine right now.
4. i have 3 jobs right now, and I'm a full time student as well. mostly, I want to spend more time with God everyday of my life, yet i find it so hard to put him first.
5. i really want and need to loose some weight so i am making a new goal starting tomorrow morning. i want to loose 13 pounds. thats what i want. thats what i need.
6. i hate crying anymore.
7. i feel like sometimes i just am not worthy or even good enough to lead a small group anymore. i have so many flaws and imperfections, and i struggle so often in so many areas that i wonder if i should really be leading others.
8. i'm just sick to my stomach of this heavyness
standing now
calling all the people here to see the show
calling for my demons now to let me go
I need something, give me something wonderful
I believe
he won't take me somewhere I'm not supposed to be
you can't steal the things that God has given me
no more pain and no more shame and misery
you can't take me down
you can't break me down
you can't take me down
love and hate
how much more are we supposed to tolerate?
can't you see there's more to me than my mistakes
sometimes I get this feeling - makes me hesitate
you can't take me down
you can't break me down
♡ taken at DownFaLL - closing soon
send your dreams where nobody hides
give your tears to the tide
no time
no time
there's no end, there is no goodbye
disappear with the night
no time
no time
♡ taken at DownFaLL - now closed
finally got round to processing some new shots this is Kinder reservoir from the downfall peak district Derbyshire/south Yorkshire
Rivière Saint-Maurice au printemps - Saint-Maurice River in spring. From the Gouin reservoir to the confluence of the St. Lawrence River in Quebec, the Saint-Maurice offers a long route, between tumults and calm waters, of 563 kilometers.
Credits: Reed
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Kinder reservoir taken near the downfall on Kinder Scout in the Peak District Derbyshire,and yes there is an airliner in this photo on approach to manchester airport can you spot it?
Kinder Downfall, Kinder Scout, Peak District, UK
© 2021 Paul Newcombe. Don't use without permission
Stunning sunset light and colour at Kinder Downfall.
I headed up Kinder Scout via Hayfield yesterday. I spent a while photographing Sandy Heys and decided to get to the downfall as the sun dropped into the next clear gap.
I made it in time but just fired off a few shots without thinking too much about the composition. It was difficult to compose anyway with the spray.
I only ended up with a few minutes as the sun dropped into more cloud. Really difficult to process to be believable. The sun was too high really to shoot into it.
But I thought this captured the essence of the place. I use the 'finger trick' to reduce unwanted flare but kept some in on this one as it added to the feeling.
Feel free to be critical with feedback. I'm probably thinking it anyway :)
Oh and I really could have done with a polariser but didn't have time to pull it off my other lens.