f l a m i n g o
226/365/9
8:11pm. My last night at the gas station. I am sad. I hate quitting. I’ve been here 3 1/2 years, I’ve made some great friends and will miss seeing my regular customers. It kept me working through Covid when I was laid off initially. I worked here 40 hours when the store was literally falling apart in all ways back in 2017, and I was working my main full time job also. I only work here one day a week now. But I am afraid to leave. I hate letting go. I want to cry. I’m afraid I won’t have work again. And this is one place I know I can stay. But all the new people here don’t care anymore. The brand new shift manager tonight said 2 words to me, Disappeared for 40 min, then came back and clocked out and still didn’t say anything to me. I’m sick of people that have no work ethic, vibrancy or enthusiasm. I don’t anymore either but I try to put on a good face for work. I do not understand why I’m at the same place as I was 25 years ago. Going backwards in pay, working harder than ever, still just getting by. Existing. That’s all I do. I don’t like my day job that I loved at first, things happened that really put a bad taste in my mouth, I don’t want to play their morale boosting games or take anything from them after getting yelled at for asking a question of the boss. They are nice but I’m not comfortable any more. I find mistakes the girl above me makes and her supervisor, yet they don’t want or like when I’ve pointed it out to them. It’s a very long story. I take pride in my work and check and double check before I send things off. I get more money per hour at my grocery store job wiping off carts and greeting customers than I do at my day job. I’m hiding my time and trying not to make a rash decision. I want ONE job that will pay me what my 3-4 jobs combined pay me. And I’ve been praying that for 25 years. I don’t give up, I don’t quit, I persevere, I never call in to work, I keep going, I am a perfectionist. And nothing changes or gets better. I’m afraid to leave the gas station, but I don’t want to be here. It’s further away than any of my jobs, but it was only a block away from work when I first started and until I got laid off last october. It is out of my way to come here. I’m very very sad. And scared... all the time scared. If I don’t do one thing I’m afraid I will lose my apartment or income. I have zero backup. So.... this photo of the sunset is a goodbye picture to this job phase of my life..
226/365/9
8:11pm. My last night at the gas station. I am sad. I hate quitting. I’ve been here 3 1/2 years, I’ve made some great friends and will miss seeing my regular customers. It kept me working through Covid when I was laid off initially. I worked here 40 hours when the store was literally falling apart in all ways back in 2017, and I was working my main full time job also. I only work here one day a week now. But I am afraid to leave. I hate letting go. I want to cry. I’m afraid I won’t have work again. And this is one place I know I can stay. But all the new people here don’t care anymore. The brand new shift manager tonight said 2 words to me, Disappeared for 40 min, then came back and clocked out and still didn’t say anything to me. I’m sick of people that have no work ethic, vibrancy or enthusiasm. I don’t anymore either but I try to put on a good face for work. I do not understand why I’m at the same place as I was 25 years ago. Going backwards in pay, working harder than ever, still just getting by. Existing. That’s all I do. I don’t like my day job that I loved at first, things happened that really put a bad taste in my mouth, I don’t want to play their morale boosting games or take anything from them after getting yelled at for asking a question of the boss. They are nice but I’m not comfortable any more. I find mistakes the girl above me makes and her supervisor, yet they don’t want or like when I’ve pointed it out to them. It’s a very long story. I take pride in my work and check and double check before I send things off. I get more money per hour at my grocery store job wiping off carts and greeting customers than I do at my day job. I’m hiding my time and trying not to make a rash decision. I want ONE job that will pay me what my 3-4 jobs combined pay me. And I’ve been praying that for 25 years. I don’t give up, I don’t quit, I persevere, I never call in to work, I keep going, I am a perfectionist. And nothing changes or gets better. I’m afraid to leave the gas station, but I don’t want to be here. It’s further away than any of my jobs, but it was only a block away from work when I first started and until I got laid off last october. It is out of my way to come here. I’m very very sad. And scared... all the time scared. If I don’t do one thing I’m afraid I will lose my apartment or income. I have zero backup. So.... this photo of the sunset is a goodbye picture to this job phase of my life..