Horrific Hornbeam

Things may go bump in the night........ deep, deep, deep in the very darkest parts of the Forest......an ancient Hornbeam stirs on this night of all nights. Un-pollarded for over a century it will take vengeance for this neglect and throw a mighty hunk of deadwood your way. It will devour the soul..of your shoe (or boot) and go hell bent for leather to find another. Do not look this hideous beast in the eyes for it will find your inner sanctums, your shyness and insecurity and beat you to a pulp with its mighty wisdom. Its weighty limbs will crush you with one blow and bury you in the ground to nourish the soil where its gnarly buttress roots await refreshment. Do not run, do not hide and do not sleep for the arboreal ghoul will find you a treat....and it doesnt like flippin Haribo or Smarties. Okay?

Done