Day 196- More Than

No matter what my mother might think, I am more than a disorder.

 

I realized that she can't see past my history and my labels. And she can't tell me she's proud of me, even after I pointed it out to her, because she thinks I'll be dead before I have the chance to do anything.

 

I'm going to give her a chance. But I can't have a relationship with someone who makes me feel like it's a mistake that I'm alive. I have lived the past 10 years with this "knowledge" that I was going to die young. I actually came to peace with it. Even as I was obviously learning how to deal with myself, she refused to see me as a human being. When I was 18, she told my boyfriend not to bother trying to fix me or help me, because it was pointless.

 

Just because she can't deal with me doesn't mean nobody can. I can deal with me. Casey can deal with me. The aforementioned boyfriend could deal with me. Anyone who actually cares to can deal with me. It's not hard.

 

Made Explore #400.

 

 

 

Done