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Paths in Thoughts

This might seem somewhat strange for me to say, but I often hike when I'd rather not. There's no one making me, and in fact, I kind of want to hike when I don't want to. There's a lot to learn about myself in times like those. Long distance runners talk about hitting a wall, deep into a marathon, pushing past the limits of human endurance. But my limits are never physical. I'm in decent shape, so a few hours in the forest is no great challenge. The question is more in leaving home for the cold or heat, overcoming an urge to sleep in longer or kick back all day on the couch. I'm not a driven person by nature. I suppose that sounds absurd, for someone starting off his nineteenth year of daily exploration. Some think I possess an unquenchable force pushing me forward. In the absence of that, I've discovered the joy in making myself, going against the gravity of a less-than-willing mind. Those who went full-out since birth are deeply disturbed when change comes to them. They might be miles beyond my physical capacity, but when anxiety, depression, or injury arrives with a desire to curl up and stay put — they may not have the paths in thoughts to follow out. I've turned out well-attuned to all my best escape routes. That mattered a lot when I was younger, and with age, it matters more.

 

November 22, 2025

Moschelle, Nova Scotia

 

Year 19, Day 6586 of my daily journal.

 

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Uploaded on November 24, 2025
Taken on November 22, 2025