Me eating Froot Loops
Mom: Oh, that's an adorable picture. And your Froot Loops. Look at those eyes.
Me: I look rather put upon, actually.
Mom: Yeah, you were probably like "Enough with the pictures every minute!"
Me: Tell me about the high chair.
Mom: Am I a bad mother that I made you sit in a high chair with flowers?
Me: Mom, I always loved flowers! I never had a problem with that!
Mom: Well, I bought the highchair to suit the décor more than to suit a little boy.
Me: I remember the highchair. I remember getting my hand caught in the crevasse between the seat and the back. But I don't remember being strapped in.
Mom: You were chained in!
Me: That makes it worse!
Mom: Why, I couldn't let you fall out! It was a cement floor!
Me: Well, modern highchairs have a tray to prevent me from...
Mom: Well, you had a tray, but now you were a big boy, and at this age, we took away the tray, and you used the chair more as a booster seat to sit at the table. Don't forget, years ago, there wasn't all the safety apparatuses you have now, and kids didn't seem to fall out of their highchairs the way they do now. Maybe they were sturdier, because they were metal instead of plastic.
Me: So at that age I could eat Froot Loops?
Mom: Yeah, well, you were already a year old.
Me eating Froot Loops
Mom: Oh, that's an adorable picture. And your Froot Loops. Look at those eyes.
Me: I look rather put upon, actually.
Mom: Yeah, you were probably like "Enough with the pictures every minute!"
Me: Tell me about the high chair.
Mom: Am I a bad mother that I made you sit in a high chair with flowers?
Me: Mom, I always loved flowers! I never had a problem with that!
Mom: Well, I bought the highchair to suit the décor more than to suit a little boy.
Me: I remember the highchair. I remember getting my hand caught in the crevasse between the seat and the back. But I don't remember being strapped in.
Mom: You were chained in!
Me: That makes it worse!
Mom: Why, I couldn't let you fall out! It was a cement floor!
Me: Well, modern highchairs have a tray to prevent me from...
Mom: Well, you had a tray, but now you were a big boy, and at this age, we took away the tray, and you used the chair more as a booster seat to sit at the table. Don't forget, years ago, there wasn't all the safety apparatuses you have now, and kids didn't seem to fall out of their highchairs the way they do now. Maybe they were sturdier, because they were metal instead of plastic.
Me: So at that age I could eat Froot Loops?
Mom: Yeah, well, you were already a year old.