A SOUTHERN MAN IN THE NORTH: “MANCHESTER CAVIAR” AND A REQUEST TO REGULAR READERS by Carl Burkitt

From Swindon to Southampton to London, Carl has made the move to Cheadle Hulme.

 

I ordered a large portion of chips from my local chip shop the other day.

 

"Fish?" the person behind the counter asked.

 

"No thanks," I said, "I'm a vegetarian."

 

"Gravy? Curry sauce?"

 

"Curry sauce, please."

 

"Manchester caviar?"

 

"No thanks, I'm a vegetarian."

 

Dear reader, the person behind the counter along with several of my fellow customers chuckled for quite some time before someone explained to me that 'Manchester caviar' is in fact 'mushy peas'.

 

I smiled and ordered some. But on the walk home I was somewhat gutted at my obvious display of southerness.

 

I've lived in Cheadle Hulme for over three years now and have been exposed to, and added to my arsenal, a fair whack of Greater Manchester slang.

 

I say 'Ta rah' when I leave a room. I call good things 'Mint'. I say 'Nice

 

one' instead of thank you. I know what 'Quaggy' means. I don't feel awkward asking for a 'Cheese barm' these days, and I'm more than happy to tell someone to 'Wind your neck in' if I think they're chatting nonsense.

 

Sure, my friends back home and my immediate family back in Swindon are sometimes perplexed why I say 'Eee are' these days, and use 'Pal' more regularly than I do 'Mate'.

 

But I don't care, this is my home now. I enjoy blending in. That's why my ego was bruised when I told the person behind the chip shop counter that 1 did not want mushy peas (Manchester caviar) because I'm a vegetarian.

 

So, dear reader, I have a request for you. Please can you tell me all the Greater Manchester slang or phrases I need to know. Make me one of your own. Stop the chip shop locals laughing at me.

 

Send in your (clean) slang to news@communitynewsgm.co.uk

 

Thank you. I mean, nice

Done