sign hack

SEPTAfail

 

I've received several emails about this now so here it is:

 

The Southeastern Pennsylvania Transportation Authority

(SEPTA) is committed to providing non-discriminatory

transportation services to all its passengers, including

schizophrenics, drug addicts, Irish Catholics, hipsters,

homos, prostitutes, gentrifying transplants, raging

maniacs, tourists, obnoxious Penn students, corner boys,

pimps, drunk rich kids who still think Old City is cool, and

terrified suburbanites who tremble with unease at the

sight of everyone.

 

Any person who is or seeks to be a patron of SEPTA

public vehicle shall be entitled to the same depressing

experience of loud cell phones, obese people eating

McDonalds, parents telling their toddlers to "Shut the

Fuck Up!", and a constant inch-deep layer of urine-soaked

trash and debris.

 

No person or group of persons shall be discriminated

against on any grounds with regard to routing,

scheduling, or quality of transportation service furnished

by SEPTA, with the following exceptions—race, color,

socioeconomic status, and proximity to suburbs.

 

Any person who has experienced a cleaner, more

efficient, more extensive , and better managed public

transportation in the U.S. (e.g. Most if not all) can

feel free to notify SEPTA about potential improvements,

which shall promptly be ignored.

Done