I'm Sorry.

Hey guys. Please read this I really want to explain why I haven't been around much lately, beyond my physical health issues. I just wanted to apologize to everyone of you. I feel like I've let EVERYONE down in some way recently and I want to just... apologize. So here we go:

 

Flickr, I'm sorry for my absence. I could say I was busy (I have been but, not busy enough to not fit in photography) or that there was something tragic happening that detoured me from taking photos. Those are all lies. It wasn't even the fact of motivation. It was the fact that for some reason every single activity I once loved is now an area of stress to me. I've basically abandoned everything in my life that once brought me pleasure. I've walked away from everything that people could critique me on. Art, Photography, Martial Arts. All of that. I use to live and breath those things, and now I can't even get the courage to participate in any of them. Its PERFECTIONISM, and its gotten the best of me. It's caused SO MUCH performance anxiety that at times its so hard to function.

 

I'll be the first to say, I have issues. Irrational issues at that. But I'm putting this out there in the world because its about time for people to understand whats going on. God knows I've had a hard time getting the courage to explain.

 

Which brings me to my second apology. There are alot of people out there who think I've dropped off the face of the earth. I such at communication. I have people who want to get senior photos taken and NUMEROUS teachers who haven't heard a thing from me. I PROMISE, I will get around to messaging or calling you, but its taking some time. :/

 

Friends. I'm sorry that I haven't been very... friendly. I feel like I've hurt a lot of people because of my inflexibility due to health and mental state. I've lost a lot of you guys, and I suck at getting around to explaining and actually bringing up the courage to speak to some of you. Again.. I'm super bad at communicating. Please forgive me. I'm not your ideal person to be friends with, but I am human?? I'm the WORST person to make plans. Again. Bad at communication, and following through with things. Not something you want in a friend... I know.

 

And I'm sorry that these tones suck. And that it slightly looks like I have a bun in the oven, I DONT (don't worry). Its just prints never look good on me. xD

 

I hope that explains atleast something...

 

"life starts at the end of your comfort zone..." And I'm trying to step out again. Its just been difficult.

 

Even though I'm a screwed up human being don't let that detour you from following my photography. It's meant so much to me that I've had numerous members come up to me with encouraging words.

 

Oh, yeah... my PRO account expires in like... 3 days. xD forgot to tell you guys that.

 

I LOVE YOU FLICKR.

I'm not dead.

Done