Chris Arnade
Courtney: Hunts Point, Bronx
"People don't get what it is to be an addict. It's harder to fight than it sounds. Addiction's a disease -- it just keeps you coming back. When you're trying to do good, when you're in rehab trying to get better, the devil's out there getting stronger." -- Courtney
Courtney or "Lady," 22, has been in Hunts Point since she was 19, born and raised in the Bronx. Her sister introduced her to weed at 11, and she started sniffing coke with friends at 14. At 16, she tried angel dust. "When I was 17, I started getting heavy on angel dust. We would get real dusted, and I would black out. I've been raped on angel dust before, and that wasn't even a wake-up call to me." She started trying to sell crack at 19, until curiosity propelled her to try her own product. As her habit developed, a childhood friend introduced her to sex work to support her addiction. After four rehab programs, she's only found the last helpful, noticing moderate success when trying follow-up outpatient therapy. Throughout the ups and downs, her mom and younger siblings, moderately aware of her lifestyle, have remained loving. "I drove my mom crazy the whole time. She thinks I don't appreciate her, but I do. She's always been the only person there. She wants to see me do better."
"I keep coming out here and fucking up. I used to be so pretty. I want to get out of it -- that's my dream, to be a cosmetologist. I want to make people beautiful. I want to make all the girls who never saw their outer beauty see that as well as their inner beauty. I want to make them see that there's more to them than the streets and getting high. And if I don't make it there, I want to be a vet because I love animals."
More on Addiction: Faces of Addiction
Courtney: Hunts Point, Bronx
"People don't get what it is to be an addict. It's harder to fight than it sounds. Addiction's a disease -- it just keeps you coming back. When you're trying to do good, when you're in rehab trying to get better, the devil's out there getting stronger." -- Courtney
Courtney or "Lady," 22, has been in Hunts Point since she was 19, born and raised in the Bronx. Her sister introduced her to weed at 11, and she started sniffing coke with friends at 14. At 16, she tried angel dust. "When I was 17, I started getting heavy on angel dust. We would get real dusted, and I would black out. I've been raped on angel dust before, and that wasn't even a wake-up call to me." She started trying to sell crack at 19, until curiosity propelled her to try her own product. As her habit developed, a childhood friend introduced her to sex work to support her addiction. After four rehab programs, she's only found the last helpful, noticing moderate success when trying follow-up outpatient therapy. Throughout the ups and downs, her mom and younger siblings, moderately aware of her lifestyle, have remained loving. "I drove my mom crazy the whole time. She thinks I don't appreciate her, but I do. She's always been the only person there. She wants to see me do better."
"I keep coming out here and fucking up. I used to be so pretty. I want to get out of it -- that's my dream, to be a cosmetologist. I want to make people beautiful. I want to make all the girls who never saw their outer beauty see that as well as their inner beauty. I want to make them see that there's more to them than the streets and getting high. And if I don't make it there, I want to be a vet because I love animals."
More on Addiction: Faces of Addiction