My Love

While Zelda and Josie played, and Juan catapulted unhappy birds into wooden structures, I sat under a tree and picked up where I started.

Chris was so sweet and bought me all these books I told him I wanted to read this summer.

One of them is My Sister's Keeper by Jodi Picoult.

Oh my gosh.

It's just so....

Let me put this in an understandable way.

Relatable. Minus the lawsuits Anna is putting her parents through. Or the relationship between Campbell and Julia (which I also find intimate). But the effects everyone's actions have on each other.

First of all, the older brother, Jesse. My older brother Zack could be his twin. Zack doesn't live with us anymore but he lives about six blocks away in a gang ridden neighborhood. I worry about him so much. My dad doesn't like me visiting him, because its so dangerous. The reason Zack moved away was because of mom. I cried when he left. I miss him so much, but sometimes I see him around town, with a beer in his hand, or a needle. But he doesn't set stuff on fire.

Beside's the brother situation, I remember when my mom was diagnosed with cancer. Me waking up one night and seeing take chunks of her hair out. It scared me, because I though only boys were bald. I remember I made my dad shave my hair off, so I could be just like my mom. Some of the girls in my classroom didn't know my mom had cancer, and they called her a freak and made fun of me.

All the nights I spent in the hospital waiting room. I went there so often, everyone knew my name. My brother kept telling me she was going to die, but I told him God would never let mom die because she loved Him so much.

But then one night, mom stopped breathing. We were in the room with her. I was about to fall asleep and then a loud, continuous beep sounded. All these doctors rushed in and me, my dad, Zack, and baby Juan were forced out.

When my dad told me she had gone to Heaven, I thought he meant that she went to Heaven and will be back. So I waited. And I waited. And I waited, until it finally hit me she was dead.

I promised myself I wouldn't ever care for anyone else. I hated those people who had cancer, and survived. Why couldn't my mom survive? She wasn't a bad person. She never lied. She was always there for me. I tried to avoid the topic of cancer, or illness.

Lucky for me, I made a friend, named Claire, who's brother has been battling cancer since he was three. It annoyed me he was still alive. As I spent more time around Claire, and Jake, I realized that some people come and go, regardless of their past. Emma, just nine years old, died in a fire. A life with so much potential, just taken away. But you know, that's life. We all die eventually, some sooner than others. The important thing to remember, is that if you truly love someone, no matter whether they are with you, six blocks away, or looking down on you from Heaven, they are always with you.

If I could, I would marry Jodi Picoult. I'm not kidding. Although I prefer Chris, but you know.

If you read all this, you are crazy, because I'm pretty sure you have been killed mentally by my annoying life story paragraphs. But you are so awesome, and in the future, I think things will be less confusing, hopefully. Because if they aren't then that's just a waste.

Done