Gary^The^Procrastinator
Friends in Low Places, Part 1, GC5 Faction Finalist
A tale of escape, from Lands of Classic Castle. PART 1: Return of the Ice Wizard.
“Sir Caelan, Baron of Munro,” he thought to himself, “big deal now.” He held up the chains around his wrists to look at them. The chains were old and rusty, but not so worn that he could bust them apart, try as he had. Even if he could, they were also fastened onto a longer chain spiked into the stone pillar behind him. “Baron Stupid,” he cursed himself.
What a fine mess indeed. His intuition had practically screamed for him not to attend the new Queen’s coronation, but he ignored his friend Tavish’s gut feelings as well and went anyway. Worse, he had brought Lady Kenzie along as his “date”. Why? He realized now it was vanity. The title had gone to his head. ‘Couldn’t skip the coronation as a new Baron’, and all that uppity rubbish. Even though the Queen had obviously been all-too perfect to be real.
He had at least been suspicious enough to arrange for some help should he not report back to the mainland in 24 hours. He had instructed Tavish to come over at night in a small boat with a few of his Lenfald Scout Snipers if he didn’t show. That time had come and gone now by at least six hours, and what good was it anyway? Impossible for such a small force to break in and find him. And what of Lady Kenzie? He thought she might be in a cell near him as he had heard her voice, but still...
Feeling quite foolish as he stood there in the cold, he also had come to realize something even worse. He had an “old friend” here somewhere in this castle. No, not the two other prisoners also held in this chamber, one reasonable older Garhim named Jorvik, and a Loreesi whom he would dislike even if Loreos hadn’t recently pillaged his country, named Sir Erliss. No, it was none other than the Ice Wizard himself, old Jens Valtyr.
For after bringing down Valtyr during the attack on the Magic Isles the previous year, instead of killing him, Tavish and Caelan had made a present of him to King Wenseclaus, right here in this very castle. The King had decided to put off capital punishment and instead had the Ice Wizard imprisoned - somewhere in this dungeon complex he was in now! And being an agent of the Outlaws, clearly he would have been freed by the newly revealed evil Queen. She would need all the help she could get to take Roawia over, and Valtyr was effective. Caelan had felt the brutally icy blow that Valtyr could deliver, and the memory of it gave him a shiver now.
But it also got him thinking. And suddenly…
“Jorvik,” Sir Caelan looked over to the next pillar at the gruff Northerner, “confirm something for me will you? When metal is cooled down to severe freezing, doesn’t it get brittle? You Garhim should know about that, right?”
“Hmmm,” Jorvik nodded in that typical aloof mannerism of his people, “but what of it lad? It’s not gonna get dat cold ‘ere! Ever. Even if it did, we’d long be dead a’ freezin’ before. Forget it.”
No, Caelan wouldn’t forget it and he thought for a long while until the guard came in with plates of food for them. The moment the guard entered, Caelan started in conversation mid-stream, as if he had been jawing for hours. He stated to Jorvik in particular, “So if the Ice Wizard knew I was here, I would be in the worst way you see, as I’m the one who put him here in the first place! What’s this garbage?” Caelan asked the guard, staring at the plate of food being offered as imperiously as he could. “This isn’t food, you swine! It may be fit for you but not us!” And he kicked the plate across the room. “Now get me food suitable for a royal, you cesspit-swill!”
The guard was furious, made a nasty comment about Caelan’s lineage, and stormed out mumbling he knew “how to fix you, by thunder!”
Sir Erliss snarled, “You insolent fool of a Lenfel! Now we get no food!”
Caelan just stared at him. “You’re not very bright are you? You’re head’s like a burnt-out torch.” He then glanced over at Jorvik, but instead of anger, the Garhim was studying him.
“You’re takin’ one nasty gamble there, Lenfel,” he replied in measured tones. “I know of whom you speak, he is from Garheim, and you are most likely a dead man. A frozen dead man.”
“Better to chance the ice than to starve here while the Scum Queen uses me against my own people.”
Sure enough, not a half hour later the locked door was opened and Jens Valtyr, the formidable Ice Wizard, stumped in with the same guard in tow. “Well now, if it isn’t that little fool of a knight come down low, ha ha. I’m lucky to be alive, and my leg never healed properly.” He came closer to Sir Caelan. “I will limp the rest of my life because of you!”
“Must be hard to clean out the Queen’s cesspit then,” Caelan snapped at him as arrogantly as he could sound. “Can’t imagine she’s got you doing anything else as you are such a worthless wizard.”
Valtyr took the bait and Caelan could see him losing control even in the low light of the dungeon. “You Lenfel dog! I am the greatest Ice Wizard in all of Roawia!”
“Exactly. I got your worst and defeated it with a little bit of wood. No, the Queen obviously prefers Fire Wizards. Why do you think she dresses in fire-red and not your pansy-blue?”
That was enough to trip the Ice Wizard into action. As Valtyr sputtered, “You have no wood to cower behind now!” he brought up his hands and cast his Ice Blast before the guard could stop him. But not before Caelan, who was fully prepared for this very thing, jumped backwards, pulling the chain taught. The blast was horrible and slammed against the pillar, covering the chain and shooting cruel streams of freezing ice everywhere. Where it touched him Caelan had frostbite, but he had avoided the worst of it. The chain however was covered, as was his intention.
The guard stepped in to stop the Ice Wizard from a second blast, as the guards were expressly forbidden from killing their important captives, on pain of death from the Queen. With this distraction going Caelan snapped as hard as he could on the chains and they shattered from the spike, leaving a long chain at his disposal for a weapon, and he immediately used it on Jens Valtyr’s head. As the wizard dropped like a rock to the hard ground, Caelan swung again and hit the guard so hard he spun in place and fell against a stool behind him, shattering it. Both men lay motionless.
“Brilliant!” Sir Erliss proclaimed, finally getting the plan.
“You are one lucky Lenfel,” Jorvik just shook his head with chuckle.
“Rather be lucky than good any day,” Caelan swooped down and grabbed the keys off the unconscious guard’s belt. Within minutes both Jorvik and Sir Erliss were free, Caelan had snatched the guard’s crossbow and gave the dagger to the Garheim, and had switched into the guard’s red and black uniform. He let Sir Erliss take the black helmet (as he thought it ugly anyway) and headed for the door. “We must separate. I have to rescue Lady Kenzie, and I can’t ask you to come,” he stated to Jorvik. “And take Dead Torch with you for company,” he gave a nod at Sir Erliss and was out the door, headed down the hallway for where he had heard her voice.
CONTINUE READING MORE OF THE STORY IN PART 2 HERE.
Friends in Low Places, Part 1, GC5 Faction Finalist
A tale of escape, from Lands of Classic Castle. PART 1: Return of the Ice Wizard.
“Sir Caelan, Baron of Munro,” he thought to himself, “big deal now.” He held up the chains around his wrists to look at them. The chains were old and rusty, but not so worn that he could bust them apart, try as he had. Even if he could, they were also fastened onto a longer chain spiked into the stone pillar behind him. “Baron Stupid,” he cursed himself.
What a fine mess indeed. His intuition had practically screamed for him not to attend the new Queen’s coronation, but he ignored his friend Tavish’s gut feelings as well and went anyway. Worse, he had brought Lady Kenzie along as his “date”. Why? He realized now it was vanity. The title had gone to his head. ‘Couldn’t skip the coronation as a new Baron’, and all that uppity rubbish. Even though the Queen had obviously been all-too perfect to be real.
He had at least been suspicious enough to arrange for some help should he not report back to the mainland in 24 hours. He had instructed Tavish to come over at night in a small boat with a few of his Lenfald Scout Snipers if he didn’t show. That time had come and gone now by at least six hours, and what good was it anyway? Impossible for such a small force to break in and find him. And what of Lady Kenzie? He thought she might be in a cell near him as he had heard her voice, but still...
Feeling quite foolish as he stood there in the cold, he also had come to realize something even worse. He had an “old friend” here somewhere in this castle. No, not the two other prisoners also held in this chamber, one reasonable older Garhim named Jorvik, and a Loreesi whom he would dislike even if Loreos hadn’t recently pillaged his country, named Sir Erliss. No, it was none other than the Ice Wizard himself, old Jens Valtyr.
For after bringing down Valtyr during the attack on the Magic Isles the previous year, instead of killing him, Tavish and Caelan had made a present of him to King Wenseclaus, right here in this very castle. The King had decided to put off capital punishment and instead had the Ice Wizard imprisoned - somewhere in this dungeon complex he was in now! And being an agent of the Outlaws, clearly he would have been freed by the newly revealed evil Queen. She would need all the help she could get to take Roawia over, and Valtyr was effective. Caelan had felt the brutally icy blow that Valtyr could deliver, and the memory of it gave him a shiver now.
But it also got him thinking. And suddenly…
“Jorvik,” Sir Caelan looked over to the next pillar at the gruff Northerner, “confirm something for me will you? When metal is cooled down to severe freezing, doesn’t it get brittle? You Garhim should know about that, right?”
“Hmmm,” Jorvik nodded in that typical aloof mannerism of his people, “but what of it lad? It’s not gonna get dat cold ‘ere! Ever. Even if it did, we’d long be dead a’ freezin’ before. Forget it.”
No, Caelan wouldn’t forget it and he thought for a long while until the guard came in with plates of food for them. The moment the guard entered, Caelan started in conversation mid-stream, as if he had been jawing for hours. He stated to Jorvik in particular, “So if the Ice Wizard knew I was here, I would be in the worst way you see, as I’m the one who put him here in the first place! What’s this garbage?” Caelan asked the guard, staring at the plate of food being offered as imperiously as he could. “This isn’t food, you swine! It may be fit for you but not us!” And he kicked the plate across the room. “Now get me food suitable for a royal, you cesspit-swill!”
The guard was furious, made a nasty comment about Caelan’s lineage, and stormed out mumbling he knew “how to fix you, by thunder!”
Sir Erliss snarled, “You insolent fool of a Lenfel! Now we get no food!”
Caelan just stared at him. “You’re not very bright are you? You’re head’s like a burnt-out torch.” He then glanced over at Jorvik, but instead of anger, the Garhim was studying him.
“You’re takin’ one nasty gamble there, Lenfel,” he replied in measured tones. “I know of whom you speak, he is from Garheim, and you are most likely a dead man. A frozen dead man.”
“Better to chance the ice than to starve here while the Scum Queen uses me against my own people.”
Sure enough, not a half hour later the locked door was opened and Jens Valtyr, the formidable Ice Wizard, stumped in with the same guard in tow. “Well now, if it isn’t that little fool of a knight come down low, ha ha. I’m lucky to be alive, and my leg never healed properly.” He came closer to Sir Caelan. “I will limp the rest of my life because of you!”
“Must be hard to clean out the Queen’s cesspit then,” Caelan snapped at him as arrogantly as he could sound. “Can’t imagine she’s got you doing anything else as you are such a worthless wizard.”
Valtyr took the bait and Caelan could see him losing control even in the low light of the dungeon. “You Lenfel dog! I am the greatest Ice Wizard in all of Roawia!”
“Exactly. I got your worst and defeated it with a little bit of wood. No, the Queen obviously prefers Fire Wizards. Why do you think she dresses in fire-red and not your pansy-blue?”
That was enough to trip the Ice Wizard into action. As Valtyr sputtered, “You have no wood to cower behind now!” he brought up his hands and cast his Ice Blast before the guard could stop him. But not before Caelan, who was fully prepared for this very thing, jumped backwards, pulling the chain taught. The blast was horrible and slammed against the pillar, covering the chain and shooting cruel streams of freezing ice everywhere. Where it touched him Caelan had frostbite, but he had avoided the worst of it. The chain however was covered, as was his intention.
The guard stepped in to stop the Ice Wizard from a second blast, as the guards were expressly forbidden from killing their important captives, on pain of death from the Queen. With this distraction going Caelan snapped as hard as he could on the chains and they shattered from the spike, leaving a long chain at his disposal for a weapon, and he immediately used it on Jens Valtyr’s head. As the wizard dropped like a rock to the hard ground, Caelan swung again and hit the guard so hard he spun in place and fell against a stool behind him, shattering it. Both men lay motionless.
“Brilliant!” Sir Erliss proclaimed, finally getting the plan.
“You are one lucky Lenfel,” Jorvik just shook his head with chuckle.
“Rather be lucky than good any day,” Caelan swooped down and grabbed the keys off the unconscious guard’s belt. Within minutes both Jorvik and Sir Erliss were free, Caelan had snatched the guard’s crossbow and gave the dagger to the Garheim, and had switched into the guard’s red and black uniform. He let Sir Erliss take the black helmet (as he thought it ugly anyway) and headed for the door. “We must separate. I have to rescue Lady Kenzie, and I can’t ask you to come,” he stated to Jorvik. “And take Dead Torch with you for company,” he gave a nod at Sir Erliss and was out the door, headed down the hallway for where he had heard her voice.
CONTINUE READING MORE OF THE STORY IN PART 2 HERE.