RAB'S REVIEWS

THE LEECH WOMAN 1960 B/W

Sometimes one might have to make a journey in life. Possibily a journey one might not wish to take. Great men and Great women have made Great journeys at personal loss, but came out the better for it. Had one not made the journey......(I wonder if)......is not much comfort, when one looks back at a lost opportunity.!!!!

Hello and welcome fervent si-fier and reviewer , to another Rab's Review. The Leech Woman is a journey I do not want to take. I hate Leeches, worms make me queazy, I have tendencies to faint on seeing even a spot of blood, not to mention, vampirism, even someone who looks 'pale' gives me the 'heebie-jeebies'.

Nevertheless I will make this journey, I know I will be terrified, I will have panic attacks, I will be horror-struck, my flesh will creep, my blood will curdle and run cold, I will be anxious and agitated, I will be reduced to a quivering jelly, and be in 'all-of-a-doo-dah'.

But I will come out the other end of this film a far better man for having made the journey, and who knows, I might even learn something about women.

Do you like murder stories, revenge, greed, power, youth, life, adventure, special effects, potions and blood letting, alcoholsim mixed with the elixir of life, well my friend....this is the one for you....!!!

Big bold white lettering displays the opening titles, some lively trumpet music, cymbal crescendos, kick start the imagination.

Let me introduce you to Malla, a scarfed, haggard old lady, with a walking stick, enters into Dr Talbots office (endocrinologist)...gland secretion, to you and me, she's a wise old lady, a woman of substance.

Mr and Mrs Talbot look like a 'squeeky-clean' American couple, but there are cracks begining to appear in the marrage, which incidentally is the back bone of the film holding it together. Mr Talbot, wearing white lab overalls offers Mrs Talbot , who is sitting at the table, a glass, (she refuses it) Mr Talbot says, "Thats a novelty, you refusing anything with alcohol in it, Im not used to seeing you sober at this time of day." Mrs Talbot replies, "If you're trying to humiliate me you did that years ago, I can't reach you without crawling into a bottle." Mr Talbot answers, "It's intresting to watch a 'bottle-babe' defend her weakness, I can't even get a rise out of you, I think I like you when you are 'slappy drunk and violent'." (lots more abuse and she tries to slap him, but he just catches her hand and remarks) "I know what I am, you try to hide what you are in the fumes of whiskey." Mrs Talbot goes to the cupboard gets herself a drink saying, "here's to you whiskey, the guardian of all frustrated wives," and knocks it back. Mr Talbot asks if she would like to help him with his experiments, but she laughs and belittles him saying, "Go on butchering your guinea pigs, they can't put you in jail for that." He shouts, "GET OUT!!!" she replies, "I gonna do you a big favour, Im gonna give you a divorce."

Meanwhile Malla is waiting to see Dr Talbot, she overhears Mrs Talbot on the phone talking to her solicitor Neil, as she leaves, Malla stands up and says, "Mrs Talbot you will never divorce you're husband, you won't have to, he will die, his death will give you life, a new way of life, you may run away but you will never escape me, you are the one in my dreams of BLOOD."...(at this point I felt quite squeamish, and I checked I had my Therapists phone number) Mrs Talbot leaves disturbed and hurriedely (I wish I could)

Sally, Dr Talbot's assistant takes a blood sample from Malla, looking through a microscope Dr Talbot concludes, "It's remarkable, corpuscle count blood pressure ethal indicate extreem old age, I'd be tempted to believe it if you had your birth certificate." Malla points to a 'scar' on her shoulder saying, "That's my birth certificate, the Brand of the Arab Slaver." Malla tells them of her tribe, how she wants to return to her kindred, and her mother who taught her many things. Malla produces a small 'snuff-box' saying, "this is all that remains of my inheritance a few pinches life giving, NYPEE"..(nigh-pea). Dr Talbot inquires, "are you saying this powder will make you young again." Malla says, "NO!, this slows the approach to death, there is another....SUBSHAN," (look out for this error, poor Malla means to say SUBSTANCE,....ahh! God love her, she was doing so well...) "which is a secret of the high priest of the NANDOES." Dr Talbot informs her he is a man of science and will not give her any money for her journey home, untill he sees a demonstration. Malla replies, "get me a glass of water." Malla adds some powder to the water and drinks it. Dr Talbot speaks, "If this powder does as you say, you will have all the money you need to return to your people."..(we are ruthlessly held in suspense, as the director 'cruelly cuts' to Mrs Talbot, who is having a drink with Neil at home, discussing divorce)...she's drunk. Neil says, "Everything is owned jointly...is that right." Mrs Talbot replies, "It's trash, everything is trash, it's all trash like me, old trash." She then quotes the words of old Malla, "You are the one in my dreams of blood!!." Neil says, "You're drinking your self to the DT's," a bit of a scuffle ensues, as Mr Talbot enters the living room, saying, "Neil, Im glad you're here, just the man I want to see." Dr Talbot is very excited, and divorce is the last thing on his mind, he produces the little snuff-box and says, "You're looking at the most powerful concentrate of hormonr knowen, this retards ageing, a similar hormone was discovered by a British scientist 25-30 years ago, the common silk worm produces it, the only trouble with that hormone it only works on insects,....this stuff works on Humans.

"Where did you get this,?" asks Neil, Paul replies, "it's a plant from Africa, she also mentioned another substance, which when mixed with this, will actually make old people young again." Paul goes on to say how he believes this to be possible, and is willing to go to Africa to find the plant, he says to June, "June I want you to to come with me, that is if you can forgive me for all those awful things I said to you this afternoon." June says, "You mean you don't want a divorce," "Of course not," replies Paul, "I'll make it all up to you, Oh what an Idiot I've been not to realize how important you are to me, just think of the trip, the jungle, It'll be so exciting," (they fall into each others arms and embrace) June says, "Oh Paul, you're my life, you just pulled me out of the bottom of the pit, but if you ever let me go again it will be the end of everything for me." Paul says, "Darling just think of our being together and how much I love you."

Africa now, Paul is striking up a deal with a guide, "5000 dollars now, and 20 000 dollars later, if I find what Im after." The guide is reluctant, and offers many excuses. Paul hands the guide a cheque, the guide takes it and smiles saying, "Your insistence has not impressed me, but your money is most persuasive."

The deal is 'struck' and the guide tells Paul of an old lady who had been here a couple of days ago, to hire bearers....could this have been Malla?

So the Adventure begins and we are treated to some picturesque jungle scenes, jungle sounds add to the excitment, charging elephants, lions, wilderbeast, a 'cute' little monkey up a tree, suddenly a snake appears and everyone carefully walks round it. As the Adventurerscross a river, crocodiles, hippos, and electric eels, start to slide down the muddy river bank looking for supper. (there are some great underwater 'shots' of Hippos, which delighted me, but they were not swimming around in a nice circle, like the begining of the B.B.C. programs. Everyone gets across safely and they set up camp.

In one of the tents Mr and Mrs Talbot are getting quite 'close'. Paul says to June, "It's gonna be a long day tomorrow you'd better get some sleep." June sighs, "are you angry with me," Paul replies, "should I be," (Dear reader listen out for this classic from June)..."You haven't been 'SERVEL' to me since we started this 'TRICK'"..what June means...(You haven't been CIVIL to me since we started this TRIP) This has given me a window into the mind of June, is June a real alcoholic struggling to remember her lines...or is this 'off-the-cuff' convincing acting at it's very best, I am left somewhat bewildered and amazed by this, and come to the conculsion, it's better for me if I don't know. Paul says, "Ahh June don't start imagining things," June replies, "I don't have to I've done everything I could to please you, and still you avoid me, you seem to take a (...here it comes again)....STISTIC...(should be SADISTIC)..pleasure in making me miserable." Paul gets up and goes to leave the tent, June grabs him, begging him not to leave her like a wounded animal, June threatens to leave him, Paul embraces her and kisses her she says, "why can't you always be like this, I love you so much Paul, there's nothing in the whole world I would'nt do for you, Paul I'd even die for you." Paul tells her when he has the secret of the NANDOES REJUVENATION he will make her young again, but she turns away from Paul and becomes hysterical and roars, "Oh! how stupid I've been, of course Im important to you, and you really do need me, don't you, where else would you get a Guinea pig who could talk, who could tell you how she feels, Oh! how desperate I must have been to listen to your lies." She runs out of the tent in tears, and into the jungle, a prowling leopard gives chase, June trips and falls, the leopard pounces, but the Guide who was following June, shoots the Leopard, and he comforts June saying, "Now, now , it's alright June, the leopard is killed, you are safe, lets go back to camp." Later on something disturbs some birds in the trees, they go to take a look. They discover an empty 'SEDAN' and a walking stick, which is Mallas. June screams and points, there are 5 or 6 dead bodies strewn over the ground, but not Mallas, the guide says, "what worries me, is why these bodies are still here, there are plenty of Hyenas and vultures around, something has been frightening the scavengers away."

In the undergrowth a mysterious NANDO warrior is watching, he follows and suddenly appears to them in the camp. Paul raises his rifle to shoot, but the quick thinking guide knocks it aside saying, "that man isn't alone, we'd be dead already if he wanted to kill us." A band of NANDO warriors appear with shields and raised spears, capture them, tie their hands, take their supplies and take them back to their Nando village. The captives are forced into a Straw Hut. Outside the tribesmen are performing a ritual display. The Guide looks outside saying, "I think we are about to have company." Paul exclaims, "It's Malla, she'll help us you'll see." The Cheif Medicine man helps frail old, skinny Malla into the hut. Paul continues, "Malla tell your people to set us free, we're not here to do any harm to anyone, we've come to help them." Malla says, "I know why you've come, you're scearching for the source of the Sacred NYPEE, and I will show it to you." She holds up a Plant saying, "An Orchid, a species that only grows in the region of Africa." Malla tells them it takes 5 years to harvest even a few ounces of Pollen, then aged 5 more years. Paul exclaims, "I must have it," Malla replies, "Don't you want to see me made young again, you will tonight, you, your wife and I will share the Nando Secret."...Night arrives, and they are led into Malla's Temple. Malla raises her hand, a man is forced unto his knees, and his head is forced into a bowl of Gaseous liquid. "he's drugged." They lay the Unconscious man at Mallas feet. The chief medicine man opens the top of a white skull, takes out a ring, puts it on his finger, makes a fist and punches the unconscious man in the back of the neck, he Dies. Paul notices, "he's lanced the 'PINEAL GLAND' deep inside the 'CEREBELLUM'" Malla takes some powder from the skull, puts it into a small cup, the chief medicine man lets some liquid from the ring 'drip' into the powder. Paul informs us, "He's adding some PINEAL HORMONE into the NYPEE." Malla drinks it and becomes unconscious,...(lots of steam begins to appear...and I mean lots, it obliterates our vision, the steam begins to disperse and a beautiful woman slowly lifts her head from the throne, were Malla once sat.....wow! she is beautiful!...she smiles at the 3 onlookers...

The body is removed, Paul exclaimes, "it's a trick, it's another woman." June confirms, "It's Malla." The rejuvenated Malla smiles, the crowds acknowledge with vigorous Drum-beating and cheers, Malla bows, she says, "Now you have seen the secret of the 'Nandoes' as I promised." Paul wants to take the secret back to the states, Malla insists that the secret will never leave her people. Paul asks, "Malla could you make my wife young again,"...(close-up of a horrified look from June)..Malla says, "Yes, but she must choose a man for the sacrifice, think well before you refuse an opportunity as rare as this, when you make your decision call me." Paul encourages June to do this, so they can escape, and come back for her later. June says, "You mean you'd actually leave me here." June goes outside and tells Malla she's ready. Malla says, "Come choose a man for the sacrifice," June replies, "any man I like," "I choose him," and points to Paul. Malla says, "an excellent choice, you will have beauty and revenge at the same time." David, (guides name..hatches a plan) says, "Mrs Talbot, why don't you give Malla a gift, since she has given you the gift of youth." So David goes to get Mrs Talbot's gold necklace as a gift,while retrieving the necklace, he lifts couple of sticks of Dynamite from the supplies. David is brought back to Malla's temple, June is on the Throne now, a couple of 'heavies' are forcibly putting Paul's head into a bowl of steaming drugs, and an unconscious Paul is left at June's feet, Paul's neck is pierced and the NYPEE is concocked, June drinks it. The steam clears, June raises her head..(Wow! this stuff is good...) she's beautiful, she speaks, "It's true, Im young, Im young again." Malla takes June and shows her to the crowd, they rejoice..but David had secretly droped some dynamite sticks into the camp fire...BAAANNNNGGG!!!, lots of NANDOES fall to the ground, they make their escape amid the confusion and flames, throwing dynamite-sticks hither and thither, some explosive scenes here...

June and David make haste their escape, they lie on the river bank exhausted, a crocodile threatens them, they flee. David points out, "We're safe as long as we stay away from the river bank, the river runs North to lake Victoria, that's where the railroad is." They look deeply into each others eyes, embrace and kiss passionetly! Later on as they sit round the Camp fire, June is inspecting her fingers and says, "look at that, Malla said it would'nt last, I can't sleep at night thinking the way I was, I'd rather die than go back to that." David produces a little leather pouch of NYPEE saying, "Young Lady, you're in the company of a man who's gonna be very rich when we get back, I have here the ELIXIAR of sudden wealth and beauty." He returns the Nypee to his pocket. They fall asleep. June has her face to the ground, her hand doesn't seem right, she stirs, looks at her hand, it's wrinkled, old and horrible, she looks in the mirror, her face is gruesome, she wakens David screaming, "Help me!, I need help!," David shouts, "Take your hands of me, don't touch me." June crys, "I want the NYPEE, I want the NYPEE," David throws her into the Brush and runs off, June screams, "Don't leave me, Don't leave me." But David trips and falls into some sinking sand, shouting, "I can't get out, help me out Im sinking June." June insists, "Give me the Leather pouch and I'll help you out," He throws her the pouch, she puts the Ring on her finger, reaches David a branch to grab on to, but just as David is about to be rescued, she grabs his head, and delivers a powerful punch to the back of the neck. She adds the Serum to the powdered NYPEE, David sinks dead under the quicksand, June drinks the concoction, curls up into a ball and shaking on the ground.

An airport scene, Neil Foster and his fiancee Sally wait for (who they believe to be) Mrs Talbot's neice. They take her back to Mrs Talbots house, Sally waits outside in the car. Neil carries in the suitcases, as Neil is about to leave, Miss Hart asks him, "Neil do you know where my aunt kept the liquor." they move over to the bar, Neil pours a couple of Vodkas, they drink, Sally blows the car horn, Neil says, "I'd better go," Miss Hart asks, "Would you take my bags upstairs, put them in my aunts room for now." Neil obliges and goes upstairs, she follows him. They both enter the bedroom, Sally 'blows' the horn again, Neil says, "she's getting impatient I'd better go," Miss Talbot (Teri) blocks the door saying, "she has years to wait, my time is much shorter, I can't explain...do you think I'm attractive." Neil answers, "you know you are," they embrace and kiss passionately. Teri notices her hand, she is shocked, she shouts, "Get Out! Get Out of here," and pushes Neil out of the bedroom, the Camera points to Teri's face, (be prepared to be shocked here) a gruesome visage of an old withered white haired sobbing woman. Sally bursts into the house and takes Neil away.

Neil is in his office, he opens the door to meet June he says, "I can't tell you how sorry I was to hear about Paul, sit down, What can I do for you, I want to hear all about your trip."June lifts her Veil saying, "shocking isn't it, what 3 mounths of tragedy can do to a woman, I need some money untill Paul's insurance can be settled." Neil's secretary makes a cheque out for 5000$, and Neil gives her some jewellery from the safe. On the way out June says, "thank you for being so kind to my neice, she would like you to excuse her for her awful behaviour." Neil says, "thats ok, I want to know if she's safe," June replies, "I'll tell her to call you she'll appreicate that."

June is walking home, she stops outside a bar, shes being watched by a 'shady' looking character, a drunk 'bumps' into June, she drops her card. She walks on and the 'shady' character follows, and approaches June, gives her the card she dropped, they walk back arm-'n-arm and get into a convertable. They park up a mountain, the man notices her jewellery and money, he is planning to rob her, he puts his arm around June saying, "do you like young men...,got any relatives, are you all alone, nobody to worry about you." We see a close-up of June's gloved hand, she 'flicks' the ring around her finger ready to strike. He starts to Strangle June, but June manages to strike him in the back of the neck with the deadly ring, she adds the serum into the 'NYPEE' (bye-bye stranger).

Sally enters into Neil's office, he asks, "What are you doing here," Sally replies, "it would be more to the point if I asked you, considering we had a date 2 hours ago." Sally knows something is 'going-on' between them, she leaves, the phone rings it's Teri, Neil speaks, "I'll be there as soon as I can."

Teri is cooling champagne waiting for Neil. There is a knock at the door, Sally bursts in saying, "All set for a lovely evening arn't you, champagne, soft music, very nice, but you've missed the most important thing, Im putting you on the next plane to New York." Teri replies, "don't be ridiculous, leave me alone." Sally pulls out a Revolver, points it at Teri, "This is the most persuasive little instrument, and if you don't want me to use it, you'd better hurry." As Teri gets her purse from her coat, she slips the 'deadly-ring' unto her finger, lifting her coat she says, "you can get into an awful lot of trouble, a little girl that plays with guns." she 'Lunges' at Sally, a struggle (cat-fight) starts, the Gun falls to the ground, Teri makes the fatal 'Blow' with her ringed-fist, takes the extracted serum and lets it drop into the NYPEE, (bye-bye Sally)

Neil and Teri are together now, drinking and talking of marrage, there's a knock at the door, it's the police with a search warrant. Trei says, "Neil make them go away," The officier is looking for Mrs Talbot, to question her about a murder, he says, "It just doesn't figure, a woman who owns a house like this, getting mixed up with a guy like Jury Lando, (remember the 'shady' stranger who followed Mrs Talbot) found murdered in his car tonight, we found Mrs Talbot's calling card in his pocket, he was killed with a peculiarly sharp instrument." Teri insists, "My aunt would'nt do a terrible thing like that." The Officiers decide to check upstairs, but when they go to check another door, Teri runs to stop them crying, "I won't let you search this house in my aunts absence, Get away!, Get away!" the door is opened, and Dead Sally falls out, Teri makes a run for it, but is apprehended she screams, "She tried to kill me!, I had to kill them it was my only chance to stay young, we really did find the secret of rejuvination," she looks at her hand its begining to change, "I'll show you!!, I'll show you,!!" she moves up the stairs, "I'll become beautiful again, I'll show you," she runs into the bedroom the officiers follow, but the bedroom door is locked. They 'bang' on the door shouting, "Come on open-up!" Inside Teri drinks a portion of 'NYPEE', she moves into the view of the mirror, she has become an old woman (Mrs Talbot) she looks at herself, holds her hands up to the mirror, "It's not working!, I killed Sally for nothing!." The 3 men outside hear a scream and a crash, they break the door down, the balcony doors swing open in the wind, Mrs Talbot has escaped, they move to the balcony and look down, Mrs Talbot has jumped, she has fallen through a Glass Table, she lies Dead, a withered decrepid, old mumified, wretched woman, lieing dressed in fine silk. (great music sounds-out...to the horrendous sight that is before us). The 3 men look at each other, not knowing what to do, the Camera 'Pans' to a close-up of Mrs Talbot's face, (you have been warned).....It's all over.......

 

Done