~~~Christi~~~
my dream last night you sweetly whispered, with your kind and friendly arms around me, that i should let love in - to not be afraid, to just be...
....but i woke and felt afraid. i have never had a problem loving everyone to a point. only a handful of people have ever entered past the point of comfort. it scares me to let most into my altar......i have so much to give and so much to lose. there was a time i freely opened the doors but time has taught me to be careful. and in time i taught myself to be afraid. a hand that walks around tightly holding onto what it believes is being guarded either sufficates and gets squished.....or we find it was never there to begin with. mostly. mostly, with fists tightly clenched we cannot truly give or receive.
you gave me a gift and i rejected it once the safely of your presence disappeared. but now the thought surrounds me and i realize that that gift is still with me. it is up to me when i open it (open myself) and how i use it.
thank you.
love, me
my dream last night you sweetly whispered, with your kind and friendly arms around me, that i should let love in - to not be afraid, to just be...
....but i woke and felt afraid. i have never had a problem loving everyone to a point. only a handful of people have ever entered past the point of comfort. it scares me to let most into my altar......i have so much to give and so much to lose. there was a time i freely opened the doors but time has taught me to be careful. and in time i taught myself to be afraid. a hand that walks around tightly holding onto what it believes is being guarded either sufficates and gets squished.....or we find it was never there to begin with. mostly. mostly, with fists tightly clenched we cannot truly give or receive.
you gave me a gift and i rejected it once the safely of your presence disappeared. but now the thought surrounds me and i realize that that gift is still with me. it is up to me when i open it (open myself) and how i use it.
thank you.
love, me