Brad

I saw Brad sipping from his tallboy on 12th Street, and he asked about my camera. We talked about photography, the death of film, and I asked him for a portrait. I got that, but I got so much more.

 

Brad: "Guess what I am."

Me: "You look like the creative type."

Brad: "I'm an ex fighter pilot."

Me: "Well that's an art of its own."

 

Brad is 60. He says he was dyslexic and a high school dropout. So he figured, "Why wait for the draft, I'll enlist." (No, I'm not sure how someone with dyslexia could be a fighter pilot. But that's not really important.)

 

* * *

 

Brad: "I was a bartender too."

Me: "Really?"

Brad: "Yeh, I used to work the late shift, so I could give all the waitresses free booze. And you know what happens when you give waitresses free booze?" *winks*

Me: "All your dinner orders get fucked up?"

 

* * *

 

Brad has 3 grown kids whom he never sees. They're all in their early 20s and were born about a year apart. He claimed to be able to impregnate a woman on demand. Referring to the conception of his youngest child, he said, "I came home from the hospital after a neck operation. I was in a lot of pain. My wife had to help me upstairs to bed. Then one night she raped me. I didn't press charges."

 

* * *

 

We talked about alcohol. He said he had been sober awhile back, "because I have lupus," he said. But then he started drinking again. "I've got a fifth of Jack back in my room!" he suddenly remembered, with the look of a kid remembering a secret stash of baseball cards.

 

* * *

 

I told him I was 15 years sober.

Brad: "But now that you're older," he said, "you can have a half a glass of wine. Or a whole glass. Or two."

Me: "I can't drink safely."

Brad: But Jesus drank wine at the last supper. So I figure something must be good about wine. I'm a Christian. Do you believe in God?"

Me: "Some days more than others."

 

* * *

 

Brad/: "Alcohol is like a tool. You can use your thumbnail or you can use a screwdriver."

Me: "That was my problem...too many damn screwdrivers."

 

* * *

 

Me: "Maybe net time I see you, you'll have a camera and you'll be taking pictures of people in the city."

Brad: "And maybe the next time I see YOU, you'll have a drink with me."

 

Done