40th Birthday Present from Erin

This is from my best friend for my 40th birthday to get back at me for the rotten things I did to her when she turned 40.

1. Memory mints

2. Duct tape - instant face lift

3. Age spot remover

4. String for glasses

5. Magnifying glass

6. Paddle ball - for strenuous exercise

7. Tweezers - to remove chin hairs

8. Whistle - when you've fallen and can't get up

9. Oil of old age lotion

10. Fan for hot flashes

11. Funnel - because you wonder why everone started mumbling

12. Old age pills

13. Cup for teeth

14. Large print "Old Maid" playing cards

15. Over the hill pills

16. Bladder control pads

17. Over the hill soap

18. Hair color

19. Decision spinner

20. Ice packs for hot flashes

21. Stop snoring nose clips

22. Bran cereal

23. 40 pennies - to start retirement fund

24. Pepto

25. Ben Gay

26. Treasure box - because you have entered the metallic age: silver hair, gold teeth & lead bottom

27. Photo album to help memory

28. Placard

29. Midlife medications - Brown (for chocolate cravings), Red (hot flashes), Orange (depression), Green (frustration), Yellow (headaches), Blue (bloating) - Now that you're turning 40, it's possible you'll experience all these symptoms simultaneously, in which case, you should just eat them all at once (M&Ms)

30. 40 birthday cards

Done