The Beginning of Surrender - Part IV

Continued from: www.flickr.com/photos/42093313@N00/52652408863/in/datepos...

 

My Master’s Wrath and Mercy

 

رَبَّنَاۤ إِنَّكَ مَن تُدۡخِلِ ٱلنَّارَ فَقَدۡ أَخۡزَیۡتَهُۥۖ وَمَا لِلظَّـٰلِمِینَ مِنۡ أَنصَارࣲ

Our Lord! Indeed [You] whom You admit in the Fire then surely You (have) disgraced him, and not for the wrongdoers (are) any helpers.

Surah Aal e Imran, Verse 192

 

Tafseer e Jilani

 

Rabbana innaka man tudkhil in-naar: O my Lord! Indeed You are the one who admits into the Fire, so surely…

 

Akhzaytahu: you have disgraced him and made him (stuck) in the narrowness of imkaan, possibilities, imprisoned, punished, exiled (from Your Self), because they wronged themselves with their focus upon those other than You…

 

Wa ma lid-daalimeen: and there isn’t for the transgressors, the ones who have firmly placed themselves in the shadows of imkaan, possibilities…

 

Min ansaar: any helper who can help them and make them exit from those possibilities, except for the one who received permission from You to (be a helper) and make them exit from the possibilites from amongst the Prophets and the Auliya, Your Friends, after Your granting ability to them by the sending of the Messengers.

 

On the evening of that second day of hell, I went to the shrine near my house. I did not ask the blessed person of the shrine for anything. Not for relief, not for some understanding of how I had become so entrapped in a thought that only appeared to be nonsensical. I couldn’t even discuss it with anyone. Not that there was anyone to discuss it with! I sat there like a zombie for a while and then left. I knew in my silence, I had surrendered the matter in any case.

 

When I entered my bedroom, I saw a copy of Al Fath Ar Rabbani that I didn’t use for my regular reading. Qari Sahib had gifted it to me but it was much heavier and larger than my Urdu copy. This one had a side by side Arabic to Urdu translation on each page. I prayed the prayer of the istakhara and pried the book open to a random page.

 

Al Fath Ar Rabbani:

 

It started with a verse:

 

وَمَن یَتَّقِ ٱللَّهَ یَجۡعَل لَّهُۥ مَخۡرَجࣰا

 

And whoever fears Allah, He will make for him a way out,

 

وَیَرۡزُقۡهُ مِنۡ حَیۡثُ لَا یَحۡتَسِبُۚ

 

And He will provide for him from where he doesn’t think (it is possible).

 

Surah At Talaq, Verse 2-3

 

I didn’t look up the exegesis of the verse then. Qari Sahib wasn’t there anyway and I really wanted to know what the rest of the page said.

 

“(The above verse) closed the door of depending on means. It closed the door of the wealthy and the kings and opened the door of tawakkul, reliance. The one who was mindful, the reward for him is that He, Subhanahu, will make relief for him and a way out from what is constricted for (other) people.”

 

The first two lines gave me pause. Doors had been spoken about earlier. Now Ghaus Pak (ra) was closing them. Two of the people I happened to be thinking of were in fact rich. They were wealthy. That had never played into our interaction in terms of a factor. There wasn’t a remarkable difference in our life styles. But the mention was specific for a reason. That was not lost on me.

 

I continued to read each word, carefully going back and forth from the Arabic to the Urdu.

 

“What should I do with you, say to you? You would have been heard if you called the living but he is not alive, the one you call.”

 

From the word “alive” I knew again that I had already been told, warned, alerted by all those verses about the dead and the graves, the deaf and the blind. Not once but repeatedly. Each time gently. After translating the verses I had always felt calm. Then just like that I would forget them as if they had never even appeared.

 

Then in the next line, Ghaus Pak (ra) expressed his fury at my own “prolonged” state of stubborn-ness and ignorance and he didn’t mince his words.

 

“Your heart is empty of islam, surrender and imaan, faith and iqaan, certainty. There is no Ma’rifat, Divine Recognition, for you. There is no ilm, knowledge, for you. For you are only hawas, indulging in foolish behaviour that is dangerous, therefore speaking to you is a waste.”

 

That’s when my heart first felt fear. Never ever before had Ghaus Pak (ra) said anything remotely harsh to me. Speaking to me was a waste of his time? I just stared at the words in disbelief.

 

“O hypocrites! You were contented with words about tawakkul, reliance upon Allah, with your tongues while your hearts are mushrik, worshippers of other gods in Creation. My heart is filled with anger towards you out of ardency (of love) for Allah Azzo Jal. If you are silent and you leave your rivalry (with Him), it is better, otherwise your houses will be burned.”

My heartbeat increased. I stopped reading.

 

“Your houses will be burned.” “My heart is filled with anger.” I felt scared to read the next line.

 

But then I saw that it was a prayer. For it was addressing Subhanahu and it started with the words, “Ya Haailo…”

It was a new Name of Allah for me. The word existed in Urdu as well. I knew what it mean. Haa’il, that which comes in between. I peered at the next words closely, fearfully. And it said:

 

يا حائل بين الماء المالح والعذب،

 

“Ya Haail-u! O One who protects, stops and obstructs and causes not to happen, by coming in between the water salty and fresh.”

 

The appearance of the words from the verse I had just translated was uncanny.

 

حل بيننا وبين التسخط عليك والمنازعة لك في أقدارك،

 

“Come between us and between discontentment towards You and quarreling with You about fate decreed.

 

حل بيننا وبين معاصيك ببرزخ من رحمتك

 

Come between us and between resistances to Your Authority with the barzakh, the protective partition, of Your Rahma, Mercy!

آمين

 

Ameen…”

 

Each time I moved to the Urdu the words had a pounding effect on me. To be sure of the meaning, I started looking up each Arabic word.

 

التسخط : displeasure, irritation, anger.

 

المنازعة : opposition, disagreement, conflict, dispute.

 

معاصي : resistance to authority.

 

I was left dumbfounded.

 

He continued:

 

“O listener! If you were Muttaqi, the one who is mindful and conscious of your Rabb, who raised you, Azzo Jal, Dakir, in remembrance of Him, as Muwwahidan, in union only with Him, Musheeran, pointing towards Him, before the trial, then when you are dropped into the fire of the distress that causes suffering, He will order,

 

یَـٰنَارُ كُونِی بَرۡدࣰا وَسَلَـٰمًا

 

O fire! Be coolness and safety.

 

After that it was a crazy day.

 

Ghaus Pak (ra) had exactly followed the Sunnah of the Quran. First had come the admonition, then the mercy. For an hour, I stared at the page and read it over and over. My heart sank every time I came to the words of his wrath. It was the first time in my life that my Master was angry with me.

 

I couldn’t get over it. Obedience was woven, no, kneaded into my nature. But all my efforts that had to do with changing the fabric of my nafs were superficial. Giving charity was easy. It was the expression of gratitude. As promised it brought me a serene state of peace. Why wouldn’t I do it only sincerely, in utter obedience? Why wouldn’t I increase it? I was the recipient of all its rewards which were truly indescribable in terms of rendering me a joy.

 

It was the changing of the nafs that was impossible.

 

I decided to immediately memorize the prayer. It was about to entail for me the most perfect expression of fear and sincere need for deliverance. That was something that I had never experienced before.

 

First I went back to re-read the verse of the seas salty and sweet.

 

That was the first moment I realized, I am both a Mo’min and I am a Kafir. All I could see in the state of being a Mo’min was the ill-will in my disposition. And all I could see in my state of Kufr was my carelessness and unawareness. There was no longer an “other.” In everything it was only me!

 

That was first forced the question; when am I which?

 

وَمَا یَسۡتَوِی ٱلۡبَحۡرَانِ هَـٰذَا عَذۡبࣱ فُرَاتࣱ سَاۤىِٕغࣱ شَرَابُهُۥ وَهَـٰذَا مِلۡحٌ أُجَاجࣱۖ

 

And not are alike the two seas.

This (is) fresh, sweet, pleasant its drink, and this salty (and) bitter…

Surah Fatir, Verse 12

 

Tafseer e Jilani

 

Then exemplified Subhanahu both of the groups, the Mo’min, the believer and the Kafir, the denier of truth, as two seas sweet and salty, so He said:

 

Wa ma yastawi al bahraane: And the two seas are not alike in advantage and benefit received from them both because…

 

Hada: the (state of the) Mo’min, the attester to the sea of Imaan, faith and Irfaan, Divine Recognition, the one upon whom is poured water from the Sea of the Essence of One-ness…

 

Adb-un: is like water fresh and delightful, giving pleasure to the mind, sweet in perfect sweetness…

 

Furat-un: sweet, it breaks the persistent feeling of ill will (to harm and avenge people) for those burning with thirst in the mirage of the world with the coolness of Yaqeen, certainty…

 

Saa’ighun sharaabuhu: easy is its drinking i.e. easy is its going down, for those set up on the nature of Tauheed, Allah Subhanahu’s One-ness.

 

Wa hada: And this (the other sea/group) i.e. the Kafir, the denier of truth or ungrateful, malevolent, unkind, is in the sea of ghaflat, unawareness and carelessness…

 

Milh-un: (is like water) salty, it does not reform a person who wants to reform themselves, whoever tastes from it, instead…

 

Ujaaj-un: (it is) burning, bitter, corrupting for the disposition. The one who tasted from it was destroyed, devastatingly, forever such that there is no rescue for him, instead…

 

Wa: the sea of bitterness, in it is still an advantage, but there is no benefit for the Kafir, the denier of truth, and the one who refuses to be guided at all.

 

The Kufr a Muslim most often imbues is that of ingratitude.

 

That is why the Quran says, it is a choice.

 

‏إِنَّا هَدَيْنَهُ ٱلسَّبِيلَ إِمَّا شَاكِرًۭا وَإِمَّا كَفُورًا ‎

 

Indeed, We guided him to the way, whether he be grateful and whether he be ungrateful.

 

Surah Al Insaan, Verse 3

 

Tafseer e Jilani

 

Allah Subhanahu made the way clear completely and perfectly. Now the human being has the choice:

 

Imma shakiran: Either he becomes grateful, occupied with the thankfulness of blessings and regularity upon fulfilling the rights of Divine Kindness, giving the reins of his determination and his choice to the rightful guidance and commands so that he may become of the Arbaab il Anayate wa Sadaad, the people of blessings and correct-ness and Al Mutana’imeena, the ones granted favours in the Heaven of Raza, God’s Pleasure and Tasleem, surrender.

 

Wa imam kafoor-an: Or he can be ungrateful for blessings (bestowed), being in denial of The One bestowing the blessings, following in the footsteps of the people of ghafalat, forgetfulness and enemity (towards Allah), disputing and being corrupt until he will become of the people of Hell.

 

“The people forever burning in the fire of possibilities!”

 

The intensity of the incident first exploded upon me once I started reciting the prayer. Each time I uttered the words, I broke down so severely, it was like someone beloved to my heart had died. Each time I heard the words in my ear that I was displeased, in opposition, resistant to my Lord, to His Authority, to His Being, I would cover my ears with my hands and almost wail.

 

One word entered my life like it had never done before. I had been saying a tasbeeh of it for years but my heart hadn’t felt the plea in the words even once till now.

 

Astaghfirullah! – I seek the forgiveness of my Lord!

 

I would repeat it incessantly through my tears. But the prayer had three lines and each line had in it a word that was the proof of my state of rebellion. The experience was intense and whatever I’m writing here to express it, the truth is that it is inexpressible. It cannot be related.

 

Only when the last line came,

 

ببرزخ من رحمتك

 

…with the barzakh, the protective partition, of Your Rahma, Mercy!

 

did I feel a tranquility come over me so instantly, every other feeling preceding it absolute vanished. Obviously I became hooked to the prayer.

 

I started saying it every single time an imkaan returned, those useless, worthless, mirages of possibilities bearing my ill-will towards others who were all absent and insignificant. I would say the prayer from the beginning till the end. Each time I spanned the cycle in the same way. I cried and cried, my tears trying to drown my self.

 

Then I would despise myself for being in such abominable state. How could I have the audacity to be displeased, quarreling, resistant? I would be pausing through the entire utterance with Astaghfirullah in repetition until I would reach the part of the barzakh, the partition. Then again I would be calm like nothing had happened. Instantly!

 

وَٱسۡتَغۡفِرُوا۟ ٱللَّهَۖ

إِنَّ ٱللَّهَ غَفُورࣱ رَّحِیمُۢ

 

And seek forgiveness (of) Allah. Indeed, Allah (is) Oft-Forgiving, Most Merciful.

Surah Al Muzzammil, Verse 20

 

Tafseer e Jilani

 

Wa: And what happened to you in your past which came from the leaving of istighfar, the seeking of forgiveness…

 

Astaghfirullah: (so now it is time to) keep seeking the forgiveness of Allah, Al Mufaddil, The Bestower of Bounty, Al Mukarrim, The Granter of Forgiveness for what you did and become occupied with compliance to His Commands in the rest of your life as compensation for what has elapsed.

 

Innallaha: Indeed Allah, Al Muta’lliu, The Only One informed of your regrets and your intentions in it (that seeking of forgiveness and being in obedience of His Orders)…

 

Ghafoorun: is Forgiving, He forgives your sins from the past also…

 

Raheem-un: is All Merciful, He accepts your tauba, repentance, which is followed by your errors by His Favour and His Generosity (of which you are undeserving).

The prayer took over my life for the next few days. I didn’t speak about it to anyone. I continued my classes with Qari Sahib. In my next class, the first thing I did was look up the verse my page had opened to:

 

وَمَن یَتَّقِ ٱللَّهَ یَجۡعَل لَّهُۥ مَخۡرَجࣰا

 

And whoever is in taqwa, conscious of Allah, He will make for him a way out,

 

وَیَرۡزُقۡهُ مِنۡ حَیۡثُ لَا یَحۡتَسِبُۚ

And He will provide for him from where not he thinks (it is possible).

Surah At Talaq, Verse 2-3

 

Tafseer Jilani

 

Wa: And overall…

 

Mayyattaqillah: the one who is mindful of Allah Subhanahu and safeguards his nafs, self, from His Qahr, Wrath, and Ghadab, Displeasure and keeps watch over himself from crossing the limits of His Boundaries which are drawn by Him, (the boundaries created) for the safeguarding of the rights of the people, especially the rights of spouses and practice mutual love for each other and (the one who) relies upon Him in all his states and entrusted his matters, all of them, to Him…

 

Yaj’al lahu: He, Allah Subhanahu, makes for him…

 

Makhrajan: a way out from the narrowness of possibilities which give result to different kinds of khudlan, humiliation and khusraan, losses.

 

Wa yarzaquhu: And He gives sustenance and carries towards him all of his needs that he is needful of in the subsistence of his family…

 

Min haysu la yahtasibu: i.e. from a place not expected and where he doesn’t have to wish for it to come from.

 

Narrowness of possibilities, humiliation, losses! There was a way made out, unexpected, unforeseen, “where he doesn’t have to wish it from.” With sustenance, not livelihood in currency as rizq is most often translated, but sustenance, emotional, mental, physical, spiritual, not for one individual in question but the entire family.

 

For whom? The one who was in a state of consciousness of Subhanahu and who was mindful of the rights of others. The one who was watchful that His Displeasure and His Wrath did not reach him because of crossing boundaries set by Him.

Like the displeasure and wrath of my Master had reached me.

 

There was a time I used to pride myself on a relationship with my Lord that didn’t have fear in it. But two years ago, whilst writing a piece for the Urs Mubarik of Maulana Rum (ra), I had felt intense fear. I had been translating stories from the Masnavi and one of them had been about the Day of Judgement and how each person would have to fend for themselves. I had come across one of the verses alluding to that reality recently.

 

وَلَا تَزِرُ وَازِرَةࣱ وِزۡرَ أُخۡرَىٰۚ وَإِن تَدۡعُ مُثۡقَلَةٌ إِلَىٰ حِمۡلِهَا لَا یُحۡمَلۡ مِنۡهُ شَیۡءࣱ وَلَوۡ كَانَ ذَا قُرۡبَىٰۤۗ

إِنَّمَا تُنذِرُ ٱلَّذِینَ یَخۡشَوۡنَ رَبَّهُم بِٱلۡغَیۡبِ وَأَقَامُوا۟ ٱلصَّلَوٰةَۚ وَمَن تَزَكَّىٰ فَإِنَّمَا یَتَزَكَّىٰ لِنَفۡسِهِۦۚ

وَإِلَى ٱللَّهِ ٱلۡمَصِیرُ

 

And no bearer will bear burdens (of) another.

And if a call heavily laden (soul) calls another to (carry) its load, nothing will be carried of it anything even if he be (from) near of kin.

You can only warn those who are conscious of their Lord - unseen and who establish the prayer.

And whoever purifies himself, then only he purifies for his own self.

And to Allah (is) the destination.

Surah Fatir, Verse 18

 

Tafseer e Jilani

 

Wa: And after that you recognized the Qudra, Authority, of Allah and you heard of the perfection of His Being in no need of anything, so for all of you is compulsory, the executing of His Commands and staying away from what He has forbidden because…

 

La taziru: no nafs, self, will, bear …

 

Waaziratu-n: as the bearer of burdens for being sinful, resisting authority…

 

Wizra: the burden (of) a wrong action of the nafs, self, that is indisciplined…

 

Ukhra wa in tad’u: of another and if any nafs, soul, asks…

 

Musqalatu-n: heavily laden by burdens and resisting authority…

 

Ila himliha: to share its burden i.e. someone else carry some of the burdens received by it to lessen them…

 

La yuhmal minhu shay-an: he will not carry any thing from another’s burden even if he consents to carry the burden because it is the demand of Allah’s Justice…

 

Wa lau kana: And if the person who was called to carry the burden…

 

Da qurba: is the family i.e. from the family of the asker, still all of the selves on that Day pledged (to carry) what they earned from their resistance. Each nafs will carry for its own self and no accountability will be for it except what it earned.

 

Then said Subhanahu addressing His Beloved (sending salutations and greetings upon him and his family the whole while) in the matters of His Servants:

 

Innama tundiru alladina yakhshauna Rabba-hum bil ghaib: only will you warn those who surrender to their Lord Unseen: meaning they are not beneficial, your warnings, which you recite O Akmal Ar Rusul, O Messenger who perfects Messenger-hood (salutations and greetings upon you and your family are sent by Him who made you the Nazeer) upon those wayward, with the exception of the group who are fearful of Allah and His Wrath and His Punishment, even though He is unseen for them, hearing Him, in submission to what has descended from Him, fearful of what can come from Him suddenly…

 

Wa: and along with that…

 

Aqaamus salata: they established prayer commanded, bringing closeness for them to His Essence, Al Mukhlisoona, sincere in it, Al Muttaharreena, purifying their selves from the inclination of everything except Allah Al Haqq, The Only Truth.

 

Wa man tazakka: And the one who purified himself and he cleansed his self from the leaning towards the capacity to invent a deceitful practice and whims…

 

Fa innama yatazakka li nafsihi: so indeed he only purified his nafs for his own self because the benefit of his purification returned to him, beneficial for him in his beginning and his end.

 

Wa: And after his purification from the demands of being human and the demands of animalistic desires which block from reaching of the origin of his nature…

 

Ilallahi: towards Allah, Al Munazza, The One Above all shortcomings, Al Mubarra’, The One Above all things lowly…

Al Maseer-u: (who is) The Destination i.e. Al Munqallab, the place returned to and the final abode i.e. everything returns towards Him and everyone’s purpose is Him, Subhanahu.

 

I was reminded of the exaltedness of the Chosen before Allah by the word Al Muttaharreena, the ones pure. How everyone had to purify themselves. Only one group was purified by Subhanahu Himself. That was the family of His Beloved (salutations and greetings upon him and his kin who were rendered void of any shortcoming at all).

 

The Name of Allah Subhanahu that Ghaus Pak (ra) used to begin the tafseer was an absolute favourite. I loved using it when calling out to Him in my prayers. It made no other words to follow the call even necessary. He was Al Musleh, The Reformer!

 

إِنَّمَا يُرِيدُ ٱللَّهُ لِيُذْهِبَ عَنكُمُ ٱلرِّجْسَ أَهْلَ ٱلْبَيْتِ وَيُطَهِّرَكُمْ تَطْهِيرًۭا

 

Indeed, Allah wishes to remove from you the impurity, (O) People (of) the House!

And to purify you (with thorough) purification.

Surah al Ahzab, Verse 33

 

Tafseer e Jilani

 

Innama yureedullahu: Indeed Allah Al Musleh, The Reformer of the states of His Worshipper, wishes for those who are chosen by Him, teaching them such advice and reminders which enter the heart and giving them warnings strange, unlike any other…

 

Liyudhiba ankum ar-rijsa: removing impurities from you, unattractive, loathsome by both the mind and by Jurisprudence (which can be in contradiction to one another), O…

 

Ahl e Bait: the people of the house of the Prophet (peace be upon him and his family), Al Majbooleen, who are raised upon honour and nobility..

 

Wa yutahhirakum: (and it is also His Will) to make you absolutely pure from the dirt of one’s nature and things that are hateful imperfections that exist from the beginning (from birth like the Shaitaan attached to each person), which are hurdles in the cleansing of personal nature (for e.g. menstruation or emissions)…

 

Tat-hirah: (to make you, O family of the Beloved, absolutely pure) in absolute purity. Such purity that nothing remains in you, any doubt of disfigurement and the disgrace of any shortcoming.

 

The verse of each person having to bear the consequences of their own actions had made me reflect on all the parallels I was drawing after Damascus of what I had thought was for that Day but seemed to exist and play out in our lives here. The nafs experiencing being Mutma’inna was the greatest of them all.

 

But no one could carry anyone’s burden in this world either.

Parents want to take on their child’s disease. Children want to give happiness to parents whose bitterness tells them that they will never come to possess it again. I have often wanted to give of the sight of one of my eyes to a cousin who lost it in both.

 

My nafs would ask me things like, “We won’t be able to drive again.”

 

I would consider it and say, “It’s ok. We don’t drive that much anyway.”

 

So on and so forth it goes. But it was not impossible. Each nafs had to pay the price for each decision in this world as well. Bear its consequence. Asking for forgiveness though, feeling repentant, held in it the promise of being forgiven. That existed for a relationship worldly or with Subhanahu. If it was sincere!

 

‏فَمَن تَابَ مِنۢ بَعْدِ ظُلْمِهِۦ وَأَصْلَحَ فَإِنَّ ٱللَّهَ يَتُوبُ عَلَيْهِ ۗ

إِنَّ ٱللَّهَ غَفُورٌۭ رَّحِيمٌ

 

But whoever repented from after his wrongdoing and reforms, then indeed,

Allah will turn in forgiveness to him. Indeed, Allah (is) Oft-Forgiving, Most Merciful.

Surah Al Maidah, Verse 39

 

Tafseer e Jilani:

 

Faman ta’aba: So the one who repents and returns towards Allah mukhlis-an, sincere (in heart), khai’ifan, in fear (of reckoning)…

 

Min ba’ada dulmihi: after he transgressed boundaries set by Him …

 

Wa aslaha: and reformed themselves with repentance (by returning towards Allah with sincerity) for the corruption that they have brought upon their own nafs (self) by disobeying Allah’s Orders.

 

Fa innallaha: Indeed, Allah is Al Musleh, The Reformer of all states of His Servant.

 

Yatubu alaihi: And Allah also turns towards Him and accepts his tauba, repentance, after giving him the ability for that repentance.

 

Innallaha: Without doubt, Allah is the One who is Al Muyassir, the One who gives ease in all matter for His Servants…

 

Ghafur an: He is the Forgiver of all their sins.

 

The identity of the one repenting, Ta’ib, was defined specifically:

 

Faman ta’aba: So the one who repents and returns towards Allah sincere (in heart), in fear (of reckoning)…

Fear was requisite.

 

 

 

The Necessity of Fear

 

‏وَءَاخَرُونَ ٱعْتَرَفُوا۟ بِذُنُوبِهِمْ خَلَطُوا۟ عَمَلًۭا صَلِحًۭا وَءَاخَرَ سَيِّئًا عَسَى ٱللَّهُ أَن يَتُوبَ عَلَيْهِمْ ۚ

إِنَّ ٱللَّهَ غَفُورٌۭ رَّحِيمٌ ‎

 

And others who have acknowledged their sins.

They had mixed a deed righteous (with) other (that was) evil.

Perhaps Allah will turn (in mercy) to them.

Indeed, Allah (is) Oft-Forgiving, Most Merciful.

Surah At Tauba, Verse 102

 

Tafseer e Jilani

 

Wa: And the people of Medina…

 

Aakharoona: others, not from the ones who were Al

 

Munafiqoona, persistent upon hypocrisy, Al Muttarraneena, and who practice it, but instead…

 

A’tarifu bi dhunobihim: acknowledge their sins which happened from them from mukhalifa, being against (someone) and bughz, grudges, and ta’an, being accusatory and

istikhfaaf, showing disregard and gheebat, back-biting, when sitting alone with the hypocrites and the ones who practice hypocricy.

 

And while they have the appearance of imaan, faith, and ikhlas, sincerity, but they…

 

Khalatu amalan salihan: mixed good deeds from ikhlas, sincerity and raza, seeking the pleasure of Allah and tasleem, submission…

 

Wa: and deeds…

 

Aakhara sayyan: others which were bad and those deeds were done while in the community of the hypocrites in their discourse and being accusatory. For this reason they are downgraded from the rank of the Mukhliseen, Sincere, in all their circumstances.

 

Asallaho an yatooba alayhim: And Allah will most likely accept their repentance i.e. He gives them ability upon tauba, repentance and nidama, regret and accepts from them their repentance after they become sincere in it.

 

Innallaha: Indeed, Allah Al Musleh, The One who corrects the states of His Servants…

 

Ghafooran: is Forgiving of the one who repents and regrets from the core of the qalb, the Station of Recognition of Allah in the heart…

 

Rahim: is The One who accepts their repentance when they are excessive (trangressors).

 

In writing that piece for Maulana’s Urs Mubarik I had been crying too. That crying was out of fear for a time yet to come. It was the first time I had learnt the purpose of fear in a relationship with my Lord. It was deemed essential for a believer. In that relationship fear was an element that was necessary for it to reach completion.

 

Verses attesting to that had appeared again and again.

The way out with an all encompassing rizq from the Divine was promised for whom? The one who was in a state of consciousness of Subhanahu and who was mindful of the rights of others. The one who was watchful that His Displeasure and His Wrath did not reach him because of crossing boundaries set by Him.

 

The Message could only be received by those “who are fearful of Allah and His Wrath and His Punishment, even though He is unseen for them, hearing Him, in submission to what has descended from Him, fearful of what can come from Him suddenly…”

 

Suddenly I understood why all those hours and days and weeks, months and years I spent trying to tell the ones I loved what might save them from pain were a waste of time. Theirs as well as mine. At the end of the day they never really cared if I might become angry with them or not. It never mattered. When it did, they always listened. When it didn’t that’s when they took me for granted.

 

Like I, God forbid, had been taking my Creator and His Benevelonce for granted. Astaghfirullah!

 

After the tafseer I returned to the page to re-read the next part which I had couldn’t focus on before. The incident of the fire was about the Prophet Ibrahim (as). How it was ordered to change its intrinsic nature and become cool for him by Divine Command. It was an incident only about him and for him. Not anyone else and certainly not the ordinary.

 

“…before the trial then, when you are dropped into the fire of the distress that causes suffering, He will order,

 

یَـٰنَارُ كُونِی بَرۡدࣰا وَسَلَـٰمًا

 

O fire! Be coolness and safety.

 

I had done the tafseer from before so I looked it up.

 

Tafseer e Jilani

 

Ya Naaro: O Fire, created on the nature of burning and heat…

 

Kooni bardan: become cool and leave your burning and heat…

 

Wa: and don’t harm Our Friend by your coolness as well but instead become…

 

Salaman: safety i.e. a glad reception and peaceful for him and don’t harm him.

 

How did that come to happen? If

1.I was a Muttaqi, the one who is mindful and conscious of their Rabb, who raised them, Azzo Jal,

 

2.I was sincere in my Zikr because it came from the heart. Not the mind and not the tongue.

 

3.I was Muwwahidan, in union only with Him forgetting the others,

 

4.Musheeran, pointing towards Him, feeling that nearness because I was aware that I was always being seen by Him,

 

5.then BEFORE the trial, when I was dropped into the fire of the distress that causes suffering, He would order for me,

 

یَـٰنَارُ كُونِی بَرۡدࣰا وَسَلَـٰمًا

 

O fire! Be coolness and safety.

 

It was unbelievable!

 

Shaitaan has endless tactics. Ways to enter lives and ruin then. His favourite tactic though is causing ghaflat.

 

Forgetfulness of obeying Divine Commands, forgetfulness of crossing boundaries in the rights of others, forgetfulness of Allah’s remembrance.

 

Fa ansaahum dikr Allah: so he made them forget the remembrance of Allah, Al Munqad, The Only Deliverer from deviation from the straight path, Al Murshid, The Only Guide towards guidance.

 

Hence ghaflat was the deadliest weapon. It naturally created the absence of repentance. That show of remorse was his worst nightmare because he possesses intimate knowledge of the Essence of Subhanahu. He knew what repentance could deliver when expressed with sincerity.

 

The incident from the Masnavi I had translated for that piece was about the waking of Hazrat Amir Muawia (ratu) by Iblis to say his prayers:

 

“Hazrat Amir Muawia (ratu) was asleep one day when he was awakened by someone. When he looked around he saw no one. Then he noticed a man skulking behind the door. He asked, “Who are you?” The man replied, “The world knows me. I am unfortunate Iblis.”

 

Hazrat Amir Muawia (ratu) asked him sternly, “Why have you woken me?” He responded, “The time for prayer is about to pass, O Amir.”

 

Then he quoted the Prophet of God (salutations and greetings be upon the one most distinguished in the blessings of Allah and his beloved family),

 

عجلوا ألطاعات قبل الفوت

 

Complete your worship before it (its time) expires.

 

You should run to the mosque before you miss it.”

 

Hazrat Amir Muawia (ratu) retorted, “You can never want such a thing so as to guide someone. You came in like a thief and now you tell me you are a well-wisher? Why would I believe a thief and then one who claims he wants to benefit me?”

 

Here Iblis uttered the words revealing his envy:

 

‘Once I was ranked amongst the angels and walked the path of obedience willingly. I was the knower of Divine Secrets and a companion of the ones who lived near Allah’s Throne. As travelers roam wherever they might go, the love of the homeland never leaves them. Who has ever forgotten their first love?

 

I have also drunk the waters from the rivers of The Divine’s Blessings and I have also walked in the Gardens of His Pleasure. He placed His Affection upon me as well, looked upon me with Favour. When I was a child, who fed me and guided me? He did.

 

Once I too was a lover of His Entity and Essence. If then that mighty Ocean of His Generosity rejected me, so what? When the heart is separated from what it once loved, then it learns to value the days where there was union.’

 

تا دهد جان را فراقش گوشمال

جان بداند قدر ايام وصال

 

When the separation from Him softly offers reproach,

then one is nostalgic for days passed.

 

Whether it was “kufr,” refusal or whether it was “imaan,” believing, both were made by that Power and both belong to Him.”

 

Hazrat Amir Muawaia (ratu) remained unmoved. “What you say is true but you have no part in it anymore. You misguided countless before me. You are fire, yet you expect me to believe you will not burn me? Who has not been deceived by you? Because of your cunning, the nation of Nuh (as) is still burning in regret. You caused the destruction of the nation of A’ad, drowning them in punishment and grief. The people of Lut (as) were stoned because of you.

 

You have created countless trials for Mankind. Firaoun, the philosopher, scholarly, his powers to reflect were blinded by you. Abu Lahab became ignorant because of you. Abul Hikm was rendered Abu Jahal because of you. You are the ocean of deceit, people but a drop. Answer truthfully. Why would you wake me to pray?”

 

Iblis replied, “Oh man of despair! You do not accept the truth despite a 100 arguments. My fault is only that one bad deed has made me renowned for sinfulness. The truth is that if you had missed your prayer, nothing of the world would have remained of value before your eyes. Tears of pain and loss would have been shed. This crying, this softness of the heart, this intense pain and sadness, would have become the reward of a 100 prayers. I did not want you to let out the sigh that would gain you the deep appreciation of Allah.

 

Remember the man who arrived at the Mosque late and was told by the congregation leaving it that the Messenger of God (peace be upon him and his family by their Lord who gazes upon them) had already said the last “salam.”

 

The young man sighed so deeply, the sound of it shook the listeners’ hearts.

 

One of them said, ‘Give me your sigh and take the blessing of my prayer.’

 

The man accepted his namaz and presented his sigh to me in turn. The sigh was filled with such humility and submission, the one who traded his prayer for it attained a higher rank and more.

 

A voice of the Unseen said to him in a dream, ‘In your trade, you have received the best of life, so rejoice!’

 

Your fear, O Amir, of The Divine and my envy are the reason I woke you. I woke you from the fear that your cries of repentance would burn me with jealousy. I am the envier of Mankind. I can never want anything good for them. In this envy I did what I did. I am the enemy of humans. How can I want that any benefit comes to them?”

 

Hazrat Amir Muawia (ratu) listened to his words then said to Iblis, “Now you have told the truth, O thief. In reality, you do not want that I humbly plead before my Lord with sincerity, that I weep tears of regret and repentance because the rank of that sighing and distress is more dear to Allah than anything else.”

 

ﮐﮧ ﺑﺮﺍﺑﺮ می ﮐﻨﺪ ﺷﺎﮦ ﻣﺠﯿﺪ

ﺍﺷﮏ ﺭﺍ ﺩﺭ ﻭﺯﻥ ﺑﺎ ﺧﻮﻥ ﺷﮩﯿﺪ

 

In equal regard holds The Almighty,

the tears of the sinner, the repentant, and the blood of the martyr.

 

Subhan Allah! The story was exquisitely narrated by Maulana (ra). Was it any wonder that the Masnavi was given the honour of being called the Quran in Farsi.

 

Shaitaan knows what Subhanahu’s Exalted Name Al Ghafoor encompasses. That His Mercy prevails over everything else. So he’s worried that the expression of regret, if it is sincere, might yield a person instant forgiveness. Of not one sin but all of them in one go!

 

Bishar Haafi (ra) was the most extraordinary example of that:

 

Hazrat Bishr Haafi (ra) spent most of his life drinking alcohol and roaming the streets in a state of intoxication. He belonged to a very wealthy family and lived alone. Twice, sometimes thrice a day, he changed his clothes, each garment finer than the next.

 

One day upon reaching his house he came upon a piece of paper lying on the road. It had the words Bismillah Ar-Rahman Ar-Rahim written on it. When he saw his Lord’s Name thrown on the ground like that he started weeping. Then he picked up the paper, kissed it, put some itar (perfume) on it and placed it on a high spot.

 

That night he heard the voice of Allah Al-Afuww, The Supreme Pardoner, asking him, was he not tired yet of being so distant from Him. And just like that, overnight, he became a wali (saint). He left his all of his wealth and roamed the streets barefoot. That is how he got his title, Haafi, the one who walks barefoot.

 

He was one of the few people for whom Imam Hanbal (ra) rose from his seat to greet when he entered and one of the only he walked with out to the street when he left.

When asked why he treated a faqeer, one who had given up the world and its possessions for poverty and worship, with such honour, Imam Hanbal (ra) replied, ““Jiss Rab ko mein maanta hun, Bishr Haafi uss Rab to jaante hain – the Lord that I merely believe in, Bishr Haafi knows that Lord.”

 

Subhan Allah!

 

Shaitaan takes pride in the destruction of Man, declaring it often in the Quran. He thinks he’s fulfilling his promise, keeping his word. One of those is his announcing that he will take a share of everything a Servant of God is bestowed.

Before I read the verse, I thought that was in the context of worldly possessions. Taking control of their possessions to fulfill his general mission to destroy Mankind. The usual ways of doing it via the mechanics inherent in capitalism, endless dictatorships and such. I had written about those extensively because it played out all the time. How it guaranteed his success.

 

But Ghaus Pak (ra) explained it differently.

 

لَّعَنَهُ ٱللَّهُۘ وَقَالَ لَأَتَّخِذَنَّ مِنۡ عِبَادِكَ نَصِیبࣰا مَّفۡرُوضࣰا

 

Allah cursed him and he said, "I will surely take from Your Slaves a portion appointed."

Surah An Nisa, Verse 118

 

Tafseer e Jilani

 

And how can we worship him and call him and indeed…

 

La’anaullahu: cursed Him Allah Subhanahu and expelled him from the Honour of His Presence and made him leave from (the list) of His Sincere Worshippers for the sake of deceiving the worshippers for the purpose of shirrk, associating others with Allah, and tughyan, oppression…

 

Wa: and after that he became hopeless of Allah’s Clemency and in despair of His Mercy…

 

Qala la’attakhidanna min ibadika: he said, “I will surely take from Your Servants, the ones because of whom you expelled me and because of whom you made me distant (from You)…

 

Naseeban: a portion, a share complete from what You made for him…

 

Mafroudan: appointed for them from Your Tauheed, Your One-ness, and honouring You by deluding them and deceiving them so that they commit shirrk (hoping and expecting from others except You) and associate others with You and say about You what is inappropriate for Your Majesty till they will fall by this from the binding of Your Safekeeping and Your Guardianship and become deserving of Your Displeasure and Your Anger.

 

The Displeasure and Anger would be coming one way or the other. It could be felt willingly or one would be made to feel it. Either way, it was unavoidable!

 

In each tafseer I was noticing what caused Allah Subhanahu’s Anger and Displeasure. Shaitaan had robbed me of my share for my entire life. I would have remained in that robbed state performing rote rituals even if some of them were above what was obligatory. I would have remained a Mushrik till my dying day had my Master not intervened in the manner that he did.

Ghaus Pak (ra) was the perfect manifestation of the undeniable truth that ends Surah Fatiha. Only following in the footsteps of the ones bestowed inaam, Divine Favours, was the path of least resistance. Least humiliation. Least agony.

 

For as I shockingly learnt from the Quran, even the infidels of Mecca who were proud of being Mushrikeen, it was their inherited tradition, believed in Subhanahu. After Him they worshipped those self-created idols of clay that they adorned the Ka’aba with.

 

Even they, when asked, who made these heavens and the earth, replied, “Allah.”

 

وَلَىِٕن سَأَلۡتَهُم مَّنۡ خَلَقَ ٱلسَّمَـٰوَٰتِ وَٱلۡأَرۡضَ لَیَقُولُنَّ ٱللَّهُۚ

 

And if you ask them who created the heavens and the earth? Surely, they will say, "Allah." Say, "Then do you see what you invoke from besides Allah?

Surah Az-Zumar, Verse 38

 

Tafseer e Jilani

 

Then pointed Subhanahu towards elaborating on His Tauheed, Divine One-ness, indicating to the Mushrikeen, the ones who associate others with Him, registering their state of beguile and allurement and being foolish, so He said, addressing His Beloved (upon whom and whose family He sends greetings and salutations continuously):

 

Wa la’in sa’altahum: And if you ask them, O Akmal Ar Rusul, Messenger who perfects the Messengerhood (Allah sends greetings and salutations upon you and your family since always), the disbelievers of the Quresh…

 

Man khalaqas samawaati wal ard: who created the Heavens and the Earth i.e. the highest in creation and the lowest in creation and what is between them from their mixing and who has brought them into existence and who has constructed in them and who has made to appear what is in them from the natural wonders and peculiarities…

 

Layaqoolunna: so they say, for sure…

 

Allah: Al Muttafarrid, The Only One who creates and invents, Al Muttwaahid, The One All Alone in His being worshipped and His being The Sustainer, because they have no power to turn away from this answer with their backs.

 

Ghaus Pak (ra) too was displeased and angry with me. But only out of his love for His Lord. That was the way of His Friends. They only loved because of Him. They only had enemity because of Him. I was deserving of that wrath upon me. In hindsight I was fortunate that it came.

 

In a single page he had expressed his irritation, reprimanded me, then taught me a prayer that brought me before my Lord in utmost repentance and showed me how even suffering ordained could morph into the opposite, become a blessing.

Thus I began to see how the barzakh, that partition of the Divine’s Mercy, began to take form in my life.

 

In Lahore it was part of my daily routine to visit an elderly friend who had been unwell for years. There were good days and bad but as a result of ever increasing illnesses that brought with them acute pain, more and more they would be in the worst mood possible.

 

But they too had a Spiritual Master. So every so often, he would step in and lift them out of the bitterness they were drowning in. Like a breather to remind them of who they were and not who they had become. Then they would be let go again and sink. That was how it was playing out for now.

 

The Spiritual Master is the Arif. Since Ghaus Pak (ra) says that they can see destiny ordained, they decide when to step in, for how long and when to retreat to let the disciple’s journey play out. But they are always there, keeping their eye on those who are in their charge, looking into their hearts to see how rusted they have become.

 

Each day I entered the house not knowing what mood awaited me. Mostly I was greeted with intense sarcasm, mistrust which manifested in a poisonous tongue resulting in complete humiliation. Sometimes I was alone in the room, other times people were present who ignored the incidence. I always wondered why they were silent. I was about to find out.

 

I had been reciting the prayer gifted to me by Ghaus Pak (ra). Then I was uttering it as my own repentance but like all prayers, there were branches of other Divine Mercies emanating from it. A day or two later, I entered the room expecting a thrashing. We happened to be sitting right next to each other. It was early in the day. She was being served breakfast.

 

All I had said thus far was “How did you sleep?”

 

In response came a fire of reproaches. How I could not be relied upon. I was insincere. Selfish. And so on. On every other occasion, no exceptions, I would attempt to exercise patience as I had learnt it. Silent in the tongue, begrudging in the heart, angry in the mind. Even that didn’t always work. Sometimes I would lose it and say something curt, leaving earlier than I would otherwise. Only to be extremely disappointed in my failure of restraint, beating myself up about it before I even reached my car to head home.

 

On that day, as we sat so close to each other that our thighs almost touched, I listened to the sharpness of the words that normally sliced through my heart with a calm I had never experienced before. It was so eerie that I just sat there making sure what I was feeling was in fact real. I felt like they were speaking to someone else in the room. But there was no one else.

 

I focused on my heart. Did it feel a grudge, sorry for itself for being attacked without provocation? It didn’t. I honed in on my mind. Was it angry or rolling its eyes thinking, “Here we go again.” It wasn’t. There was a partition between us. The barzakh I had pleaded for with my weeping had appeared.

It was so unexpectedly crazy it felt like magic!

 

The truth, as it turned out, was that everyone followed Iblis. The believers, the non-believers. The grateful, the ungrateful. He turns each Mo’min into a Kafir. At some point or the other, everyone was taken in by his seduction. No one’s nafs was spared.

 

Except for one group!

 

وَلَقَدۡ صَدَّقَ عَلَیۡهِمۡ إِبۡلِیسُ ظَنَّهُۥ فَٱتَّبَعُوهُ إِلَّا فَرِیقࣰا مِّنَ ٱلۡمُؤۡمِنِینَ

 

And certainly, Iblis found his assumption about them to be true, so they (all) followed him except a group of the believers.

Surah As Saba, Verse 20

 

Tafseer e Jilani

 

Then said Subhanahu taking an oath…

 

Wa: upon Himself…

 

Laqad saddaqa: indeed he, Iblis, authenticated…

 

Alayhim: upon those, Al Haalikeen, the ones who destroy themselves in the maze of khusraan, losses and kufraan, denial and ingratitude…

 

Iblis: the enemy for them, persistent, permanent in enemity with them from the beginning of their creation…

 

Dannahu: his belief, which was what he thought to be true for them when he said to their father, the Prophet Adam (as),

 

لَأَحۡتَنِكَنَّ ذُرِّیَّتَهُۥۤ إِلَّا قَلِیلࣰ

 

I will surely destroy his offspring except a few – Al Isra, 62

 

Tafseer e Jilani

 

La ahtanikanna durriyaatahu: Iblis said: I will make them wayward and trap them with vulgarity and by alluring them to do something wrong so that I can erase their names from the book of believers. So how can they become of the Arifeen, the ones who recognize Allah and the Al Mukaashifeen, for whom everything unveils, Al Mushahideen, the witnessing ones because what they are made from and their foundation, it demands different kinds of corruption and various kinds of sin and waywardness.

 

And for me there are many opportunities (through these demands) to create paranoia for them and allure them till they become misguided from the straight path of guidance and the way of correctness…

 

Illa qaleela: except a few amongst them for indeed they are Sabitoon, steadfast on what they are set up on. I have no power to persuade them towards wrongdoing because they are Muwwayadeen, assisted by You and they are Muwwafiqeen, granted ability by Your Power.

 

And he said:

 

وَلَا تَجِدُ أَكْثَرَهُمْ شَكِرِينَ ‎

 

And you will not find most of them to be grateful - Surah Al Araaf, Verse 17

 

Tafseer e Jilani

 

La tajidu: You will not find, Ya Muizzu, O You who is The Bestower of Honour to everybody else in in humiliation and The One directing the astray to the Right Path…

 

Aksarahim Shakireen: most of them to be grateful when they will return towards You, they will be not be the grateful ones, spending from what You bestowed them of blessings on what You commanded them not to do.

 

And he said:

 

وَلَأُضِلَّنَّهُمۡ وَلَأُمَنِّیَنَّهُمۡ

 

And I will surely deceive them and surely arouse desires in them – An Nisa, Verse 119

 

Tafseer e Jilani

 

Wa laudillanahum: And I will surely deceive them by different deceptions and whisperings of doubt and paranoia from the Way of Your Tauheed, One-ness…

 

Wa layumanniannahum: and I will arouse desires in them by their concerns with their livelihood in this place of deception (the world) with hirs, greed and tool al amal, never ending hopes and all types of desires of their nafs, their egos, which arise from lust and (seeking of) pleasure and much else apart from this. And after that he misguided them from the path of

 

Shukr, Gratitude and Imaan, faith…

 

Fattaba’uhu: they followed him, ungrateful and denying of the blessings and Al Munim, the Bestower of those Blessings, all of them…

 

Illa fareeqan min al Mo’mineen: except a group from the

Mo’mineen, the believers, Al Mu’qineena, possessing certainy in the Tauheed, the One-ness of Allah, Al Musaddeqeena, attesting to His Prophets, Al Muttadakkireena, taking warning that he is their enemy forever, so they turned back from him and from his persuasion by deception, thus they remained Saalimeen, secure, from his persuasion to deceive.

 

No wonder a connection to that group was deemed essential to receive guidance. They were in a count, set apart from everyone else in Creation. They were the ones who were “an’amta alayhim.”

 

The inordinate focus on the prayer from Ghaus Pak (ra) brought my attention to the verses expounding on the etiquettes of the prayer in the Quran. I looked them up:

 

ٱدۡعُوا۟ رَبَّكُمۡ تَضَرُّعࣰا وَخُفۡیَةًۚ

إِنَّهُۥ لَا یُحِبُّ ٱلۡمُعۡتَدِینَ

 

Call upon your Lord humbly and privately.

Indeed, He (does) not love the transgressors.

Surah Al Araaf, Verse 55

 

Tafseer e Jilani

 

Udu’u: Call upon Him, those who have been set up on the true nature of Tauheed, One-ness…

 

Rabbukum: your Rabb, Al Mutafarraq, The One who is Unique in your raising and in making you appear…

 

Tadarru’an: (call upon Him) humbly as the ones who beseech Him…

 

Wa khufiatan: and quietly, as the ones hiding and the ones scared, and the ones submissive from the depths of the heart, not unstable in the edges of the tongue like the transgressors.

 

Innahu la yuhibbil Mu’tadeena: Indeed, He does not like the ones who cross the boundaries of what is right, the Al Mujawizeena, the ones who exceed limits, the Al Mujahireena, the ones who ask for things loudly, Al Maalliheena, the ones who ask for wrong things in their prayer because His Knowledge of their states is enough regarding their asking.

 

It was new word for me. Mu’tadeena! I knew already Subhanahu did not like the Kafireen, the deniers of truth. He did not like the Zalimeen, the unjust, the ones who crossed limits. He did not like the Faisqeen, those defiant in their disobedience. The Mu’tadeen were also transgressors. Overtly they seemed the same as the Kafireen.

 

Except in the tafseer, everything about them seemed to be related to those of us who were on the inside of the circle of Islam. For we the ones who were praying to Subhanahu. Except we were asking for things loudly. We were asking for things wrongly. We did not deny Subhanahu. We deluded ourselves that we were aspiring to be of the Mo’mineen, the believers. We didn’t even know we had become aligned with the disbelievers. Like them we were not scared of Him.

 

The most exalted of prayers in the Quran are the ones Allah Subhanahu Himself taught His Beloved (salutations and greetings upon him and his blessed family and the utterance that came forth from them that lead the way to our salvation). It was as if He said to him, “Ask from me this and ask it like this.”

 

One of those prayers then appeared that seemed to be exactly for such a situation. For if one was being rendered a transgressor whilst in prayer, then clearly refuge was in need from Shaitaan who was prevailing in exactly that moment. A moment that one thought was intensely private and only between them and their Lord.

 

وَقُل رَّبِّ أَعُوذُ بِكَ مِنۡ هَمَزَتِ ٱلشَّیَـٰطِینِ

 

And say, "My Lord! I seek refuge in You from the suggestions (of) the evil ones,

 

وَأَعُوذُ بِكَ رَبِّ أَن یَحۡضُرُونِ

 

And I seek refuge in You, My Lord! Lest they be present with me."

Surah Al Mu’minoon, Verse 97-98

 

Tafseer e Jilani

 

Wa qul Rabbi: So say, “O Lord who raises me by Your Kunf, Safekeeping and Jawaar, Watchfulness…

 

Audo bika min hamazaati Shayateen: I seek refuge in You from the promptings of the evil ones and their waswase, whisperings and the different kinds of seductions and

misleading.

 

Wa: And especially…

 

Aoudo: I seek protection and come into refuge…

 

Bika: with You, O…

 

Rabbi Ayyahdiroon: my Lord, lest they come near me and let my focus be upon You and when my heart is soft in its inclination towards You and I invoke You, especially during my prayer and during my recitation and during the time I present my needs to You.

 

It revealed to me why the recitation of the namaz, why the recitation of the Quran, all worship was made to begin with seeking of refuge from Shaitaan and his followers.

 

فَإِذَا قَرَأۡتَ ٱلۡقُرۡءَانَ فَٱسۡتَعِذۡ بِٱللَّهِ مِنَ ٱلشَّیۡطَـٰنِ ٱلرَّجِیمِ

 

So when you recite the Quran, seek refuge in Allah from the Shaitaan, the accursed.

Surah An Nahl, Verse 98

 

Fasta’id: then seek refuge and invoke, first of all…

 

Billahi: Allah, Al Mutajalli, The One who unveils, by the attribute of speech, which makes others helpless before it, Al Hafeed, The Protector of His Sincere Servants from everything in useless sins and disobedience…

 

Min: (which occur) due to doubts and paranoia…

 

Ash Shaitaan ar rajeem: from Shaitaan the accursed one, Al Matrood, the one expelled and the one made distant from the court of the Presence of Allah Azzo Jal with the stoning of the effects of the Attributes of Allah’s Wrath and (seek refuge) from his delusions and rationalizations which are the armies of desire and forgetfulness and false imaginings and thrilling hallucinations which persuade different kinds of hopes and lust.

 

Basically possibilities!

 

Yet another revelation that came to me through the prayer Ya Haailo had to with the virtue of patience.

 

قُلۡ یَـٰعِبَادِ ٱلَّذِینَ ءَامَنُوا۟ ٱتَّقُوا۟ رَبَّكُمۡۚ لِلَّذِینَ أَحۡسَنُوا۟ فِی هَـٰذِهِ ٱلدُّنۡیَا حَسَنَةࣱۗ

إِنَّمَا یُوَفَّى ٱلصَّـٰبِرُونَ أَجۡرَهُم بِغَیۡرِ حِسَابࣲ

 

Say, "O My slaves those who believe!

Be mindful of your Lord. For those who do good in this world is good,

Only will be paid back in full the patient ones their reward without account."

Surah Az Zumar, Verse 10

 

Tafseer e Jilani

 

Qul: Say, Ya Akmal Ar Rusul (Allah sends blessings and salutations upon you since the beginning of everything), O Messenger who completes the Messenger-hood, give this message on Our Behalf, calling out to the selected sincere amongst my Servants…

 

Ya ibadi: O My Worshippers, by attaching them with His Essence making them special and honouring them…

 

Alladina aamano: those who attained to faith from amongst you in the One-ness of My Essence and My Appearance according to My Affairs and My Ever changing-ness in accordance with My Names and Attributes, the requirement of your faith is taqwa, mindfulness from the demands of your desires…

 

Ittaqu Rabbukum: be conscious of your Lord and stay away from what is forbidden by Him and what He has ordered prevented for you and characterize yourself with His Commands and know that He…

 

Lilladina ahsanu: for the ones with spiritual excellence and beautiful regard with Allah…

 

Fi hadihi duniya: in this world, which is the place of gaining lessons and choosing…

 

Hasana: there is goodness, multifold and more than a thousand times more than that in the Hereafter which is the Dar al Qarar, the abode which is forever so take heed, O people of vision, both inner and outer.

…

Innama yuwaffa as sabiroon: Only the steadfast are given in full as the Al Mutahammiloona, the ones who carry their burdens with the different kinds of difficulties and toiling with patience in the practice of Imaan, faith…

 

Ajrahum: their reward and in abundance upon them will be goodness and different kinds of recompenses and honours…

 

Bighairi hisaab: without count, for all of it and exceeding it, with no possibility of measure and enumeration and without any number, merely by His Bounty for them and His Honour upon them.

 

My way of practicing it was about to change.

 

Continued on: www.flickr.com/photos/42093313@N00/52649820039/in/datepos...

 

Done