08july5addict[1]

Decline and fail of a drug addict

 

 

 

Over the years, drug-related cases have been on a rise. Reported overdose deaths average one a month and Bhutanese youth are taking to psychotropic substances like it’s an essential part of their diet.

 

 

7 July, 2008 - The elegant young man is clad in a black gho. He is looking straight ahead with a blank expression on his face, the black gho a contrast to his flawless skin. His striking aspect predates the “Korean look” of today.

 

This moment is captured on a 4x6 inch photograph.

 

For his age, Tashi had almost everything. He was blessed with good looks, material possessions, happiness and most things that youth of his age lacked.

 

An intelligent, enterprising and obedient person, Tashi was also the most practical among his six siblings. Hailing from a family, which is into business, Tashi wanted to become successful like his father. And, as if to say it’s in his blood, he was also very business-minded.

 

Tashi always did well at school and he was wise beyond his years. But even wise guys make mistakes. He loved collecting stones, books, games, and was interested in religion - particularly the dharma. He had a lot of faith and believed in gods and deities.

 

Tashi spent most of his life outside Bhutan doing his schooling in India. He had just a few friends in Bhutan and came home only during vacations. He was sent to India again for a business management course.

 

Being the favourite among the siblings, everybody expected a lot from Tashi. If only life hadn’t been cruel to him. If only he’d lived to tell his tale.

 

Eight years have passed since Tashi’s death. But the pain is still evident in his family’s eyes and their voice. No matter how he died, to them, he is still the apple of their eye.

 

The younger ones in the family refer to him as “uncle Tashi” although they didn’t get to know him as an uncle. Born to parents like Karma and Kesang, whose children didn’t lack anything, it was not a fate foreseen.

 

Karma and Kesang have been happily married for about 40 years and, looking back, such a development was a total shock to them. “When my son expired, I went through a tough time. I even had to give up some of my work. But in life, we have to move on, no matter what,” says Karma.

 

Looking back, Karma says that he should have called Tashi back when he wanted to quit his business management course and return. “Had I called him back, the situation could have turned otherwise,” he says, adding, “it’s important for parents to listen to their children when they speak. Parents shouldn’t be too insistent when their child expresses something.”

 

Karma says, “He called me saying that he was the only Bhutanese and that he couldn’t cope with the ragging of his seniors.” But Karma had been adamant. He told Tashi not to let such things bother him and instead concentrate on his studies.

 

Following that, Tashi suffered from a fatal fall in India. He couldn’t continue his course and was brought back to Bhutan.

 

But by then things had changed. Because of the accident, he couldn’t do things like he did before. He grew depressed and befriended all sorts of people. That’s when he got heavy into drugs.

 

When Karma came to know about his son’s addiction, his family confronted him. They made him understand the ill effects of drugs. Tashi would listen and quit for a while. “There were times when I even caught him by his neck to shake some sense into him.”

 

Tashi was off the stuff for about seven months, before it took his life in 2002. The family was convinced of his recovery, hence the trip to Phuentsholing. Once there, Tashi relapsed into his old ways, as it was easily available across the border.

 

The day, they were to come back from Phuentsholing, he died. “He complained of stomach ache and backache. I called a doctor. We found injections and pills under his pillow.”

 

He died before reaching the hospital.

 

Karma says, “We took him along as he was getting bored at home. I said I’d drive from here and that he should drive on the way back home.”

 

Kesang said that, had he been alive, Tashi would have been a successful businessman. “He never asked for huge sums and wasn’t the type of person who’d blow up his money unnecessarily.” As she speaks, her voice trails off with and there are tears in her eyes.

 

The elder daughter adds, “We didn’t lack in comfort or money, neither were we unhappy to resort to drugs. It was peer pressure!” she says sobbing. “Our parents had a lot of expectations from him.” She is unable to talk further. Friends describe Tashi as the best dressed, most fashionable and stylish in their group. Above all, he was a good friend.

 

A long time friend, Sonam best describes him as “a little boy trapped in a man’s body.”

 

They were friends since the mid eighties, together at a boarding school in Bhutan. “He was a sweet looking kid. He knew nothing about drugs then,” says Sonam, who was into drugs at one point of time.

 

“I don’t know why he got into drugs. The common denomination of substance abusers is that the vacuum in their lives. Getting into drugs is easy but getting out of it is tough,” says Sonam, adding that by then even he was neck deep into drugs.

 

“Well, one thief can’t tell another not to steal. When you’re really into it, you’re unable to function without. And not many live to tell the tale of their experience,” says Sonam.

 

They lost touch in between and the next time Sonam heard about him was of his death.

 

Today, Karma is very concerned about the drug issue in Bhutan. He reads a lot on drugs. “Drug cases have become an epidemic. Such a situation should not rise in a small country like ours.”

 

For parents like Karma, it’s a lesson learned the hard way.

 

(all names have been changed)

 

 

Done