ultraheidibuttery
Paris, July 2007.
I so appreciate a moody sky. π The cloud formations above Paris were truly magnificent on my visit 18 years ago.
Traditionally, July, was/is more sunny, but when I visited the City of Love, dramatic clouds peppered the sky... and I soaked it all in. Such a vibe.
Before this trip, I gave up an entire year of my free time, spending hours studying for the CPA exam, often choosing the Boston University library, where I could focus, undistracted. As a non-student, I couldn't get on WIFI and there was not much for social media available (in 2006). Nowadays, unless you can use tech to your advantage and help you focus, I don't know how young adults are studying for the exam. There are so many distractions these days!
A few years ago, when I was using the IG app to primarily promote social causes, while working, training, volunteering and being a mom, I had to create healthy boundaries with it... or I would have never achieved success or moments of peace. I utilized many techniques to limit my use and savored the complete experience disconnection whenever I could (typically on my long runs/rides). Simultaneously, I also didn't judge myself if I got caught up and watched hours of TikTok dance and comedy videos to unwind some days... gosh, as awesome as it is to achieve goals, if you get too caught up in them and over stressed, it's not worth it... gotta protect your mental health, amiright?
πTo me, protecting mental health these days is maintaining a healthy blend of realism and idealism, given the chaotic state of the world. A concept I had to unlearn, as an adult, is that these two POVs are mutually exclusive (meaning they can't exist at the same time)... and no, that's not true: you can be both a realist (accepting how things are), but also an idealist (such as taking time to think of and dream up future plans, as in my case today: revisiting Paris.) To me, the labels of realist and idealist are another way political parties publicly divide themselves... often portraying democrats as idealists and republicans as realists... when in fact, both parties can't move the US forward. And never will.
Challenging parental and societal beliefs is absolutely crucial to your well-being, especially if they don't feel right. Elements of my upbringing/learning are still in my toolbox, but if I had never taken careful steps towards truly understanding who I am and created boundaries to think for myself along the way, I would have never accomplished some of things I did.
Many parents, myself excluded, choose to live through their children's successes (often pressuring them) and also project their fears onto them... it's a nasty, selfish, narcissistic game we've all repeatedly seen played over so many generations. Reflecting on my lived experience, I truly feel amazed I made it this far, when I think of certain past events and obstacles I've overcome. I always viewed as myself as a guide and protector of children, not as an owner, but maybe one reason is that I've had so many people try to control and own me during my life.
Two years ago, when I needed to make major life changes, to save my own sanity and move forward, I leaned on my mental health toolbox more than ever, which included advice from a few key mentors. And although they have decades of experience, I had to challenge some of their advice to be here today... still in the game of life. πͺ
Life sure is wild, right? It's funny because many years ago, my philosophical side often debated the meaning of life ... and eventually I determined it was: "to be". Quite simple. We are human "beings", not human "doings"... but society will tell you different, right? "Do, do, do!" It does seem crazy to me that after all of our human "doing" to date, including both vast technological advancements & our ancestor's sacrifices, that there's more than enough clothing (& other resources) for many future generations and housing for all, but humans collectively still can't figure it out. π€
πLet me say it a different way: Our world is literally burning and dying on so many levels and as a species, we can't figure it out? Like, at what point, will we just "be"? Even for a single day? Simply put: be satisfied. Anyway, that's the idealist/dreamer in me! πThe realist in me sees the pitiful authoritarian dictators and performers putting on quite the show. But why would they stop? They're making a π© ton of money, living hedonistic lifestyles and giving the media a lot to talk about, on all platforms. Remember folks: especially in America, after all is said and done, a lot more is said than actually done.
πOn a funny note, my favorite song to listen to a few years ago, returning from a long run, where'd I'd often brainstorm, but then have to get back to CPA life was: "Back to Life" by Soul II Soul. Haha, I've got a song for everything it seems. Keep calm & carry on, Heidi
Paris, July 2007.
I so appreciate a moody sky. π The cloud formations above Paris were truly magnificent on my visit 18 years ago.
Traditionally, July, was/is more sunny, but when I visited the City of Love, dramatic clouds peppered the sky... and I soaked it all in. Such a vibe.
Before this trip, I gave up an entire year of my free time, spending hours studying for the CPA exam, often choosing the Boston University library, where I could focus, undistracted. As a non-student, I couldn't get on WIFI and there was not much for social media available (in 2006). Nowadays, unless you can use tech to your advantage and help you focus, I don't know how young adults are studying for the exam. There are so many distractions these days!
A few years ago, when I was using the IG app to primarily promote social causes, while working, training, volunteering and being a mom, I had to create healthy boundaries with it... or I would have never achieved success or moments of peace. I utilized many techniques to limit my use and savored the complete experience disconnection whenever I could (typically on my long runs/rides). Simultaneously, I also didn't judge myself if I got caught up and watched hours of TikTok dance and comedy videos to unwind some days... gosh, as awesome as it is to achieve goals, if you get too caught up in them and over stressed, it's not worth it... gotta protect your mental health, amiright?
πTo me, protecting mental health these days is maintaining a healthy blend of realism and idealism, given the chaotic state of the world. A concept I had to unlearn, as an adult, is that these two POVs are mutually exclusive (meaning they can't exist at the same time)... and no, that's not true: you can be both a realist (accepting how things are), but also an idealist (such as taking time to think of and dream up future plans, as in my case today: revisiting Paris.) To me, the labels of realist and idealist are another way political parties publicly divide themselves... often portraying democrats as idealists and republicans as realists... when in fact, both parties can't move the US forward. And never will.
Challenging parental and societal beliefs is absolutely crucial to your well-being, especially if they don't feel right. Elements of my upbringing/learning are still in my toolbox, but if I had never taken careful steps towards truly understanding who I am and created boundaries to think for myself along the way, I would have never accomplished some of things I did.
Many parents, myself excluded, choose to live through their children's successes (often pressuring them) and also project their fears onto them... it's a nasty, selfish, narcissistic game we've all repeatedly seen played over so many generations. Reflecting on my lived experience, I truly feel amazed I made it this far, when I think of certain past events and obstacles I've overcome. I always viewed as myself as a guide and protector of children, not as an owner, but maybe one reason is that I've had so many people try to control and own me during my life.
Two years ago, when I needed to make major life changes, to save my own sanity and move forward, I leaned on my mental health toolbox more than ever, which included advice from a few key mentors. And although they have decades of experience, I had to challenge some of their advice to be here today... still in the game of life. πͺ
Life sure is wild, right? It's funny because many years ago, my philosophical side often debated the meaning of life ... and eventually I determined it was: "to be". Quite simple. We are human "beings", not human "doings"... but society will tell you different, right? "Do, do, do!" It does seem crazy to me that after all of our human "doing" to date, including both vast technological advancements & our ancestor's sacrifices, that there's more than enough clothing (& other resources) for many future generations and housing for all, but humans collectively still can't figure it out. π€
πLet me say it a different way: Our world is literally burning and dying on so many levels and as a species, we can't figure it out? Like, at what point, will we just "be"? Even for a single day? Simply put: be satisfied. Anyway, that's the idealist/dreamer in me! πThe realist in me sees the pitiful authoritarian dictators and performers putting on quite the show. But why would they stop? They're making a π© ton of money, living hedonistic lifestyles and giving the media a lot to talk about, on all platforms. Remember folks: especially in America, after all is said and done, a lot more is said than actually done.
πOn a funny note, my favorite song to listen to a few years ago, returning from a long run, where'd I'd often brainstorm, but then have to get back to CPA life was: "Back to Life" by Soul II Soul. Haha, I've got a song for everything it seems. Keep calm & carry on, Heidi