dissociating in the woods at sunset
there is something about this summer that has me feeling detached from reality, from my own experiences, and from my feelings. i think it could be my medication. it could also be the way i've learned to cope with a life where we're exposed to a constant stream of strange, cruel, and improbable events.
every week it seems there is something happening somewhere that at a different time (not even that long ago) would beggar belief. today it's just another block of text on a screen, a series of predictable reactions, reactions to the reactions, and then nothing. in the garden of our waking lives we are forever weeding.
unfortunately, when i wander into nature near my home in the evenings, i find that instead of the respite i seek i bring the day's dissociation with me. i am unable to fully leave behind the world of information and exist in a world of pure experience. this image is what that looks like to me: blurred vision, barely discernible shapes, familiar colors, altogether chaotic and intimidating. floating above myself while i watch a sunset, trying to see it through a different set of eyes.
dissociating in the woods at sunset
there is something about this summer that has me feeling detached from reality, from my own experiences, and from my feelings. i think it could be my medication. it could also be the way i've learned to cope with a life where we're exposed to a constant stream of strange, cruel, and improbable events.
every week it seems there is something happening somewhere that at a different time (not even that long ago) would beggar belief. today it's just another block of text on a screen, a series of predictable reactions, reactions to the reactions, and then nothing. in the garden of our waking lives we are forever weeding.
unfortunately, when i wander into nature near my home in the evenings, i find that instead of the respite i seek i bring the day's dissociation with me. i am unable to fully leave behind the world of information and exist in a world of pure experience. this image is what that looks like to me: blurred vision, barely discernible shapes, familiar colors, altogether chaotic and intimidating. floating above myself while i watch a sunset, trying to see it through a different set of eyes.