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Propose an appointment in person
Knowing a link through a mobile application is increasingly common. Sometimes it tends to frivolize on this way of relating, but resorting to an 'app' is a good way to meet people with whom it would not have been possible to agree otherwise. However, taking the step of the cyber world to reality is not so simple. After a handful of pleasant conversations with a 'match' it is natural to want to move forward and dare with a physical stay, but the nerves multiply the precedents are only virtual.
The first barrier to overcome is chat conversation. Starting a chat from scratch is not an easy task, especially when the only reference you have about that person is a couple of photos. In addition, many times the attitude by chat does not usually do justice to the personality of each, so the distortion is great. For this first contact to be a success, it is fundamental:
Be brief and do not focus only on yourself. Remedios Gomis says in his book 'All you need is love' (ed. Planet) that you should not insist on talking about a subject if the other person does not care. If you love football but your match is not, it is useless to try to conquer it by giving it information about Real Madrid.
It is not a simple live chat xxx, but it is the best adult chat you can have.
Forget the monosyllables. For the chat to be a success you have to park the 'yeses' and 'noes' and cause a fluid exchange.
Defer from others and focus on asking specific questions to find common ground with the other person.
Be funny. It is important that the conversation does not become heavy. It is always easier to guess with a light and pleasant conversation, since it makes the situation comfortable and favors the approach, Gomis emphasizes.
Once the first online dialogue is over, you will begin to notice more confidence with the other person and the idea of proposing an appointment in person will appear in your head.
According to the social network Tinder, this platform produces 23 million daily 'likes' around the world. And it is not the only 'app' of ligues that triumphs: Happn, the application by which to meet people you've met on the street, has more than 600,000 users in Spain alone. Given this immense volume of users it is not surprising that more and more first dates have a virtual origin.
Dr. Leslie Becker-Phelps says in her book "Love: The Psychology of Attraction" (ed. Penguin Random House) that you should "consider an online relationship as if it were an experiment" and that it is a good idea to meet in person with someone "as soon as it is clear that you have things in common". In that way, uncomfortable silences will be less likely. It also suggests that citing before finding those shared points is risky, since you can not guess what expectations the other person has about the relationship and the appointment can be a failure.
On the other hand, it is important not to lengthen the 'online' dialogue too much in order to answer necessary questions such as "does it look like your picture?" or "Do you have good manners?" that the screen will not be able to solve. "The more you invest in the chat, the more difficult it is to discard the person if reality disappoints you," says Dr. Becker-Phelps. A conversion via 'app' very long could inflate the expectations and cause you to make an image of the other person more consistent with what you would like than with what the other is really.
The details of the meeting
Once the proposal is formulated, it is time to specify the details of the appointment. The Happn application has drawn up a list of the fringes to be tied before you meet in person:
Which places are the most suitable to create the atmosphere that we pursue? From the 'app' suggest that you must flee from noisy clubs to listen well and meet the other person. The best thing to do is to stay at a bar or a lively restaurant, so you can create a fun atmosphere that encourages conversation.
What to do and what not to do? "Do not seem overactive, do not exaggerate or lie (you catch a liar before a lame), always be yourself," says Happn team.
How to dress? The ideal is to choose a style that represents you, something that you usually wear and what you feel comfortable with. It is not advisable to go around teaching a lot of meat or being too modest. For the evening to flow well, it is good that you opt for a 'look' with is that you feel attractive. It's easier to like others if you like yourself!
What to talk about? This is the most complicated point of the encounter. If you previously found hobbies or tastes in common in the chat, maintaining a fluent chat will be easier. It is advisable to avoid topics that may be controversial such as religion or politics that may lead to a discussion.
Propose an appointment in person
Knowing a link through a mobile application is increasingly common. Sometimes it tends to frivolize on this way of relating, but resorting to an 'app' is a good way to meet people with whom it would not have been possible to agree otherwise. However, taking the step of the cyber world to reality is not so simple. After a handful of pleasant conversations with a 'match' it is natural to want to move forward and dare with a physical stay, but the nerves multiply the precedents are only virtual.
The first barrier to overcome is chat conversation. Starting a chat from scratch is not an easy task, especially when the only reference you have about that person is a couple of photos. In addition, many times the attitude by chat does not usually do justice to the personality of each, so the distortion is great. For this first contact to be a success, it is fundamental:
Be brief and do not focus only on yourself. Remedios Gomis says in his book 'All you need is love' (ed. Planet) that you should not insist on talking about a subject if the other person does not care. If you love football but your match is not, it is useless to try to conquer it by giving it information about Real Madrid.
It is not a simple live chat xxx, but it is the best adult chat you can have.
Forget the monosyllables. For the chat to be a success you have to park the 'yeses' and 'noes' and cause a fluid exchange.
Defer from others and focus on asking specific questions to find common ground with the other person.
Be funny. It is important that the conversation does not become heavy. It is always easier to guess with a light and pleasant conversation, since it makes the situation comfortable and favors the approach, Gomis emphasizes.
Once the first online dialogue is over, you will begin to notice more confidence with the other person and the idea of proposing an appointment in person will appear in your head.
According to the social network Tinder, this platform produces 23 million daily 'likes' around the world. And it is not the only 'app' of ligues that triumphs: Happn, the application by which to meet people you've met on the street, has more than 600,000 users in Spain alone. Given this immense volume of users it is not surprising that more and more first dates have a virtual origin.
Dr. Leslie Becker-Phelps says in her book "Love: The Psychology of Attraction" (ed. Penguin Random House) that you should "consider an online relationship as if it were an experiment" and that it is a good idea to meet in person with someone "as soon as it is clear that you have things in common". In that way, uncomfortable silences will be less likely. It also suggests that citing before finding those shared points is risky, since you can not guess what expectations the other person has about the relationship and the appointment can be a failure.
On the other hand, it is important not to lengthen the 'online' dialogue too much in order to answer necessary questions such as "does it look like your picture?" or "Do you have good manners?" that the screen will not be able to solve. "The more you invest in the chat, the more difficult it is to discard the person if reality disappoints you," says Dr. Becker-Phelps. A conversion via 'app' very long could inflate the expectations and cause you to make an image of the other person more consistent with what you would like than with what the other is really.
The details of the meeting
Once the proposal is formulated, it is time to specify the details of the appointment. The Happn application has drawn up a list of the fringes to be tied before you meet in person:
Which places are the most suitable to create the atmosphere that we pursue? From the 'app' suggest that you must flee from noisy clubs to listen well and meet the other person. The best thing to do is to stay at a bar or a lively restaurant, so you can create a fun atmosphere that encourages conversation.
What to do and what not to do? "Do not seem overactive, do not exaggerate or lie (you catch a liar before a lame), always be yourself," says Happn team.
How to dress? The ideal is to choose a style that represents you, something that you usually wear and what you feel comfortable with. It is not advisable to go around teaching a lot of meat or being too modest. For the evening to flow well, it is good that you opt for a 'look' with is that you feel attractive. It's easier to like others if you like yourself!
What to talk about? This is the most complicated point of the encounter. If you previously found hobbies or tastes in common in the chat, maintaining a fluent chat will be easier. It is advisable to avoid topics that may be controversial such as religion or politics that may lead to a discussion.