DBRSKA
Psoriasis
Psoriasis, my seasonal friend!
Psoriasis, a chronic skin disease, autoimmune, an overproduction of skin cells, which uses stress as a good reason to spread through the body - non-contagious.
At the age of 15, my psoriasis appeared, covering 80% of my body in no more than a week, not giving me any time to adapt - it was not at all a slow dance, eheh.
During those 6-7 years of intense psoriasis, I gave up on friendships (I lost a lot of them, I got away from others), I gave up studies (I was always the girl with psoriasis / leprosy / aids - you teenagers name it! Bullied, before there would be a fancy Anglicism to characterize it in my country), I gave up jobs, gave up going to the beach (I mean, I was the center of attention I always hated to be), gave up on walks, gave up on myself, surrendered to what I thought to be defining me as a person to the world, and isolated myself - Now the whole me, was no more than a psoriasis patch, zero trust, zero self-esteem.
The little aesthetic self-esteem id get, I would search for it in the few photos I took at that time and used Photoshop (I learned to use Photoshop thanks to psoriasis! There's a plus!) To disguise the spots, trying to ignore it , pretending I did not have it. I wore all kinds of clothes that I could not identify with, but which covered them from the view of others (a little less bullying). The heat that I'd feel in the primroses until I isolate myself at home in the summers ... Ahah 😅!
BUT, nowadays the story is different! It took me a while to realize that psoriasis does not define me! It is part of me, today, and will always be, but it does not define me - AT ALL. Nowadays it does not appear in so many quantities, but it gives its air of grace.
Today, I thank psoriasis for the friends I lost at the time, they were certainly not friends for life. I thank psoriasis for my isolation, which prevented part of my character and the person I am today, from being part of an influence by teenage minds with whom I would have hang out during those years. Yes, I am a bit awkward and I have a rather peculiar way, but I love it.
It also allowed me to cultivate and increase my knowledge in areas of my interest (now, with so much free time and with no one to bother, eheh.). If I could not study in schools, I would study at home.
Today, I no longer see myself according to the amount of psoriasis that I have covering my skin - fuck it, I no longer deprive myself of a day at the beach, I no longer deprive myself of eating what I love just because I know it is a psoriasis trigger.. I mean, now we even take pictures together, and with a smiley face! (Bam!)
Life really has various forms of teaching and shaping us, such 'obstacles', at the time, we see them as our personal Cerberus, but in time we eventually realize what we are supposed to withdraw and learn from it. Psoriasis was certainly my super Cerberus, for many many years, until I've taken its strength away, today, let's call it a Chihuahua! (Rock on)
Finishing this sharing with you, I wanted you all to know that my Mother is the awesomeness of Mothers. She's always supported me to the fullest, trying to find all sorts of treatments and aids to slow down my psoriasis, who helped me through my colossal depressions, and who still helps me tirelessly to apply the patch lotions which are difficult to reach, and who helps me take care of my scalp, so my friends can continue to say that I have the most beautiful hair!
Thank you Mother, you are the greatest and you rock my world!
I wish you a rest of a wonderful week to all!
Thanks for your attention! <3
Psoriasis
Psoriasis, my seasonal friend!
Psoriasis, a chronic skin disease, autoimmune, an overproduction of skin cells, which uses stress as a good reason to spread through the body - non-contagious.
At the age of 15, my psoriasis appeared, covering 80% of my body in no more than a week, not giving me any time to adapt - it was not at all a slow dance, eheh.
During those 6-7 years of intense psoriasis, I gave up on friendships (I lost a lot of them, I got away from others), I gave up studies (I was always the girl with psoriasis / leprosy / aids - you teenagers name it! Bullied, before there would be a fancy Anglicism to characterize it in my country), I gave up jobs, gave up going to the beach (I mean, I was the center of attention I always hated to be), gave up on walks, gave up on myself, surrendered to what I thought to be defining me as a person to the world, and isolated myself - Now the whole me, was no more than a psoriasis patch, zero trust, zero self-esteem.
The little aesthetic self-esteem id get, I would search for it in the few photos I took at that time and used Photoshop (I learned to use Photoshop thanks to psoriasis! There's a plus!) To disguise the spots, trying to ignore it , pretending I did not have it. I wore all kinds of clothes that I could not identify with, but which covered them from the view of others (a little less bullying). The heat that I'd feel in the primroses until I isolate myself at home in the summers ... Ahah 😅!
BUT, nowadays the story is different! It took me a while to realize that psoriasis does not define me! It is part of me, today, and will always be, but it does not define me - AT ALL. Nowadays it does not appear in so many quantities, but it gives its air of grace.
Today, I thank psoriasis for the friends I lost at the time, they were certainly not friends for life. I thank psoriasis for my isolation, which prevented part of my character and the person I am today, from being part of an influence by teenage minds with whom I would have hang out during those years. Yes, I am a bit awkward and I have a rather peculiar way, but I love it.
It also allowed me to cultivate and increase my knowledge in areas of my interest (now, with so much free time and with no one to bother, eheh.). If I could not study in schools, I would study at home.
Today, I no longer see myself according to the amount of psoriasis that I have covering my skin - fuck it, I no longer deprive myself of a day at the beach, I no longer deprive myself of eating what I love just because I know it is a psoriasis trigger.. I mean, now we even take pictures together, and with a smiley face! (Bam!)
Life really has various forms of teaching and shaping us, such 'obstacles', at the time, we see them as our personal Cerberus, but in time we eventually realize what we are supposed to withdraw and learn from it. Psoriasis was certainly my super Cerberus, for many many years, until I've taken its strength away, today, let's call it a Chihuahua! (Rock on)
Finishing this sharing with you, I wanted you all to know that my Mother is the awesomeness of Mothers. She's always supported me to the fullest, trying to find all sorts of treatments and aids to slow down my psoriasis, who helped me through my colossal depressions, and who still helps me tirelessly to apply the patch lotions which are difficult to reach, and who helps me take care of my scalp, so my friends can continue to say that I have the most beautiful hair!
Thank you Mother, you are the greatest and you rock my world!
I wish you a rest of a wonderful week to all!
Thanks for your attention! <3