Drury Walker- Bugs and Booze
=====A Club====
Miranda- God, I miss Drury...
Silken Spider- Just drink, sweetie.
Rigger- You ever hear of a Harlan Combs? Was a family friend... *He* was in Blackgate. Gave 'im a loan of my Firebug suit. That... did not end well. He got locked up, I fell two stories after Gotham's finest broke down my door... Never liked that guy. He got the looks, the brains, the charisma ... *I* got syphilus. Unrelated though. He's probably dead. Blackgate's practically hell you know...
Miranda- What are you doing here?
Rigger- Drury told me to watch over you...
Miranda- I don't believe that.
Rigger- I was lonely.
Dragonfly- That, I do believe.
Miranda- Grab a chair then
Rigger- Yippee!
Miranda- Oh.
Dragonfly- Dear.
Silken Spider- God.
Mags- Ooooh!
Miranda- Uh, Mags? What are you-?
*Mags is examining the cutlery*
Mags- Look at that sheen! It's unbelievable!
*She pockets the forks. Then the knives. Then the spoons*
Miranda- Mags!
Mags- What? Honestly! No one's going to miss them!
Rigger- I- I would like my spoon back please.
Mags- Tough luck.
Rigger- Ok then.
*Rigger slumps into his seat. Mags rubs a knife across her face*
Silken Spider- I'm going to take tha-
Mags- Try and I'll stab you in the eye!
...
Mags- Shiiiiiny
...
Rigger- Is this what these girls' nights are always like?
Miranda- Pretty much... Drury normally reads to us, though
Rigger- Oh yeah, the book club right?
Silken Spider- We don't have a book club.
Rigger- Then why would he-?
Miranda- Don't question Drury!
...
Dragonfly- The rest of us are usually more wasted at this point...
Rigger- In that case- Waiter, more prosecco please!
Silken Spider- I don't like prosecco.
Server- And I'm a waitress.
Rigger- Oh. *Uh-hum* More booze. Please. My good *wo*man.
Dragonfly- My man!
Silken Spider- If I didn't know you any better Mr Rigger-
Rigger- You don't know me at all.
Silken Spider- Well that's not true. Remember the Walmart incident?
...
Rigger- You said you'd keep that a secret.
Silken Spider- I lied. Nevertheless, I would say you're trying to get us drunk.
Rigger- Whaaaa-? I'm not Catman! (That was close)
=====Several Drinks Later====
Miranda- So your plan failed eh?
Rigger- They're crazy... crazy... Your friends? Fucking insane!
Miranda- They're an acquired taste, sure
Rigger- Taste? Taste?
====Fantasy Land====
Women Noises- Mmm. Mmm hmm
====
Miranda- Rigger!
Rigger- Woah. I think I might be narcoleptic. I need to get this noggin sorted out
Miranda- Oh Rigger...
Rigger- I know damn it! *sniff* I'm such an ass. An ass I tells ya!
Silken Spider- *Heh* Assssss! Ass!
Miranda- Yes. Funny! Poor girl's been needing to cut loose a bit. She's, umm, been having troubles with Eric. He's in his edgy phase. You know what I'm talking about?
Rigger- Do I know it? I lived it! I started my criminal career seeking vengeance for my dead family. Killed in three separate building accidents. Fucking bullshit... What are the chances... You, uh, listening?
Miranda- Oh yeah. Terrible. Tragic. *Urgh* Dragonfly's taking her shirt off again.
Dragonfly- You'll believe a bra can fly!
Rigger- Wuh? Again?
Miranda- Yeah. Afternoon tea was not what you might imagine.
Rigger- I dunno. I have a pretty good idea
====Fantasy Land====
Miranda- *giggle* *giggle* Pillow fight!
Dragonfly- Wet t-shirt fight!
Silken Spider- Gilbert Gottfried! For some reason.
Gottfried- Yeeeaaaaaah! I'm here too! Parrots n shit!
========
Miranda- Uh, Rigger?
Rigger- Why does he keep showing up in there?
...
Rigger- The little man!
Miranda- As I was saying, then there's Mags.
Rigger- Gollum!
...
Rigger- The lads call her Gollum. Cause she's a hoarder. And unbalanced! You know what? Keep talking.
*To the tune of Shiny*
Miranda- Well, Margaret hasn't always been this mad
Mags- I was a sweet li'l girlie once
Miranda- And she always found it fun playing with her dad
Dragonfly- God damn I'm beeeeeeautiful, baby!
Rigger- What, her daddy told her "listen to your heart"?
"Be who you are on the inside"?
Miranda- Yeah, but shiny shit drove their family apart
Mags- My daddy lied!
I'd rather be shiny
Like a treasure from a sunken pirate wreck
Scrub the deck and make it look shiny
I will sparkle like a wealthy woman's neck
Rigger- ... What the heck? Is she slow?
Mags- I'm not dumb, dumb, dumb!
Miranda- (She'll chase anything that glitters, beginner...)
Mags- Oh, and I'll just come, come, come
To the brightest thing that glitters
Mmm, for winners!
I'm just a zilver
God I love silver!
Rigger- Well, well, well,
That's lovely Mrs Pye,
Excuse me while I run off to-
Mags- Die?
Rigger-... Wat?
Mag- You heard... Your buttons are very shiny...
Rigger- Oh. Um, well, I guess they are. Heh heh... I'm scared.
Miranda- Give her the jacket. She took all our knives.
Rigger- But Gilbert Gottfried signed this-! Ohhh. Now it makes sense
...
Miranda- Just gimme the jacket.
Drury Walker- Bugs and Booze
=====A Club====
Miranda- God, I miss Drury...
Silken Spider- Just drink, sweetie.
Rigger- You ever hear of a Harlan Combs? Was a family friend... *He* was in Blackgate. Gave 'im a loan of my Firebug suit. That... did not end well. He got locked up, I fell two stories after Gotham's finest broke down my door... Never liked that guy. He got the looks, the brains, the charisma ... *I* got syphilus. Unrelated though. He's probably dead. Blackgate's practically hell you know...
Miranda- What are you doing here?
Rigger- Drury told me to watch over you...
Miranda- I don't believe that.
Rigger- I was lonely.
Dragonfly- That, I do believe.
Miranda- Grab a chair then
Rigger- Yippee!
Miranda- Oh.
Dragonfly- Dear.
Silken Spider- God.
Mags- Ooooh!
Miranda- Uh, Mags? What are you-?
*Mags is examining the cutlery*
Mags- Look at that sheen! It's unbelievable!
*She pockets the forks. Then the knives. Then the spoons*
Miranda- Mags!
Mags- What? Honestly! No one's going to miss them!
Rigger- I- I would like my spoon back please.
Mags- Tough luck.
Rigger- Ok then.
*Rigger slumps into his seat. Mags rubs a knife across her face*
Silken Spider- I'm going to take tha-
Mags- Try and I'll stab you in the eye!
...
Mags- Shiiiiiny
...
Rigger- Is this what these girls' nights are always like?
Miranda- Pretty much... Drury normally reads to us, though
Rigger- Oh yeah, the book club right?
Silken Spider- We don't have a book club.
Rigger- Then why would he-?
Miranda- Don't question Drury!
...
Dragonfly- The rest of us are usually more wasted at this point...
Rigger- In that case- Waiter, more prosecco please!
Silken Spider- I don't like prosecco.
Server- And I'm a waitress.
Rigger- Oh. *Uh-hum* More booze. Please. My good *wo*man.
Dragonfly- My man!
Silken Spider- If I didn't know you any better Mr Rigger-
Rigger- You don't know me at all.
Silken Spider- Well that's not true. Remember the Walmart incident?
...
Rigger- You said you'd keep that a secret.
Silken Spider- I lied. Nevertheless, I would say you're trying to get us drunk.
Rigger- Whaaaa-? I'm not Catman! (That was close)
=====Several Drinks Later====
Miranda- So your plan failed eh?
Rigger- They're crazy... crazy... Your friends? Fucking insane!
Miranda- They're an acquired taste, sure
Rigger- Taste? Taste?
====Fantasy Land====
Women Noises- Mmm. Mmm hmm
====
Miranda- Rigger!
Rigger- Woah. I think I might be narcoleptic. I need to get this noggin sorted out
Miranda- Oh Rigger...
Rigger- I know damn it! *sniff* I'm such an ass. An ass I tells ya!
Silken Spider- *Heh* Assssss! Ass!
Miranda- Yes. Funny! Poor girl's been needing to cut loose a bit. She's, umm, been having troubles with Eric. He's in his edgy phase. You know what I'm talking about?
Rigger- Do I know it? I lived it! I started my criminal career seeking vengeance for my dead family. Killed in three separate building accidents. Fucking bullshit... What are the chances... You, uh, listening?
Miranda- Oh yeah. Terrible. Tragic. *Urgh* Dragonfly's taking her shirt off again.
Dragonfly- You'll believe a bra can fly!
Rigger- Wuh? Again?
Miranda- Yeah. Afternoon tea was not what you might imagine.
Rigger- I dunno. I have a pretty good idea
====Fantasy Land====
Miranda- *giggle* *giggle* Pillow fight!
Dragonfly- Wet t-shirt fight!
Silken Spider- Gilbert Gottfried! For some reason.
Gottfried- Yeeeaaaaaah! I'm here too! Parrots n shit!
========
Miranda- Uh, Rigger?
Rigger- Why does he keep showing up in there?
...
Rigger- The little man!
Miranda- As I was saying, then there's Mags.
Rigger- Gollum!
...
Rigger- The lads call her Gollum. Cause she's a hoarder. And unbalanced! You know what? Keep talking.
*To the tune of Shiny*
Miranda- Well, Margaret hasn't always been this mad
Mags- I was a sweet li'l girlie once
Miranda- And she always found it fun playing with her dad
Dragonfly- God damn I'm beeeeeeautiful, baby!
Rigger- What, her daddy told her "listen to your heart"?
"Be who you are on the inside"?
Miranda- Yeah, but shiny shit drove their family apart
Mags- My daddy lied!
I'd rather be shiny
Like a treasure from a sunken pirate wreck
Scrub the deck and make it look shiny
I will sparkle like a wealthy woman's neck
Rigger- ... What the heck? Is she slow?
Mags- I'm not dumb, dumb, dumb!
Miranda- (She'll chase anything that glitters, beginner...)
Mags- Oh, and I'll just come, come, come
To the brightest thing that glitters
Mmm, for winners!
I'm just a zilver
God I love silver!
Rigger- Well, well, well,
That's lovely Mrs Pye,
Excuse me while I run off to-
Mags- Die?
Rigger-... Wat?
Mag- You heard... Your buttons are very shiny...
Rigger- Oh. Um, well, I guess they are. Heh heh... I'm scared.
Miranda- Give her the jacket. She took all our knives.
Rigger- But Gilbert Gottfried signed this-! Ohhh. Now it makes sense
...
Miranda- Just gimme the jacket.