Ordinarily going by the name of Xarol, (yes, she was a shampoo model in the 70's) the lorax has a remarkable -- you might even say inordinately -- high viscosity. 11 at the very least. No joke. She was also the brains behind the idea to engineer Spinal Tap's amplifiers 10% louder. Don't quote me on this, but I thin… Read more

Ordinarily going by the name of Xarol, (yes, she was a shampoo model in the 70's) the lorax has a remarkable -- you might even say inordinately -- high viscosity. 11 at the very least. No joke. She was also the brains behind the idea to engineer Spinal Tap's amplifiers 10% louder. Don't quote me on this, but I think she even won the Nobel or Pulitzer or something for it. And if it turns out lorax is too married for your taste, no worries: she has a cousin who--OK, she's married too, but she's, like, ruh-heally hot -- hot enough to go to heck for nailing that time. But don't look to the lorax for sympathy, cuz she's got blizzards and hurricanes and bicycle messenger traffic to deal with. As if that's not enough already?