Lifelong crossdresser, realizing that the little girl inside the little boy grew up.

I found out that, when I was around twelve that I was born with ambiguous genitalia, a penis and a hidden vagina and ovaries. I didn't know that until I was much older. Until the onset of puberty, I was like any other boy but sensed that I needed to be a girl. I thus dressed in my stepmother's clothes until she came home from work. I even played a girl in a school play and it really made me feel successful in what I was.

But when puberty hit, I got very, very sick, and the hospital discovered that I had ovaries that were asserting themselves and I was menstruating with no outlet for the blood to go. I had surgery (presumably a hysterectomy) , but other than a scar, not one of my parents told me why I was in the hospital. I didn't find out until my father told me before he died. I also found out that the drug I had been taking wasn't for allergies, it was for testosterone. And after my father told me, he died before I came up with a lot of questions, like; did the hospital ask you what gender he/she would be, since the genitalia was both, except for an unexposed vulva? Would my father have chosen female if he know that I was sterile? But the biggest question was, if he had chosen female, how would he have told my grandparents and family. That alone, in 1967, would have made him chooses the status quo.

I married, and Juliette went into the closet for a long time. I think I was trying to emphasize my maleness, and grew to 240 pounds. When my wife passed away from ovarian cancer, I married again within a few years, but the pull was strong. I was diagnosed with high blood pressure, diabetes and high cholesterol. Thus ended my life of living dangerously, and over 7 years, I gave up grains and carbs; and lost 75 pounds. I've dropped from a 16 dress size to a 10.

And now, I have been off the testosterone for a few years, and feel estrogen asserting itself within me. I'm not sure why, as a hysterectomy removes the ovaries. I hope that I can dress more but my wife doesn't know anything about Juliette.

I hope too that I can be what I should be when the time has come.

UPDATE: June 2022

I found a journal that my father kept, and he did write a lot about that July in 1967. Although he told me much later that the hysterectomy he told me I had to remove all the girly parts, that didn't happen, the doctors thought I was too young and the testosterone will cause the estrogen production to go down.

I had a sonogram recently and the doctors confirmed that I had most of the girl parts except for an outlet, the vulva and vagina. That's me today.

If you are a GG/TV/CD, I want to know you as a friend. Guys and their profiles full of their junk need not bother and I will not add you and will block you. If you've nothing to share, I may block you. Please write something in your profile, so I can get to know you.

And it goes without saying that the copyright on all of these pictures belongs to me and any unauthorized use will be subject to prosecution under the laws.