I'm a twenty-nine-year-old female, half Puerto Rican, Pisces, born on a dark night in the middle of spring in 1979 - for those of you who don't want to do the math. I was born in Houston, Texas and now reside quite happily in Austin - three hours West, roughly, and have lived here pretty much continuously since sometime in late 1997. I'm in an open marriage (though we're so happy together we haven't 'taken advantage' of adding elements to our marriage or lives, individually) who spins fire, runs my own IT company in Austin, Texas. So if you ever need technical work done, we can talk about dirty deeds being done dirt cheap - and well. ;)

 

I admittedly have a strange sense of humor. Okay, it's not strange: It's downright warped in places. As such, I enjoy dark, indie-flick comedies and experimental modern writers that are far from the mainstream but that I think will make an impact upon the direction of these arts well past the time their creators are still alive and kicking. Think Flannery O'Connor, who's work was well before her time and her amazing talents downplayed as in her era it was not proper for a female to write on "such subjects" or in the manner in which she did - bluntly, sometimes making the reader uncomfortable (which makes one think! And people, by nature, simply do not want to think about that which makes them question their safety zones), edgy, and with an honesty and refinement that seemed to clash with the aforementioned uncomfortable subjects she sometimes raised in her works. Alas, I stray from . . . a point? I'm not sure I had one to begin with!

 

While I've received many compliments on my work here and, especially on DeviantArt (to which I've only started posting my work in the last few days and am a bit overwhelmed at the positive response various pieces have garnered), I still consider myself to be very much so an amateur, armchair photographer. Sure, I've been clicking away since I got my first camera at the age of six, bestowed upon me by my Dad, and won third place in a school-wide contest where I was competing against students from not only the upper elementary grades, but who were in middle and high school as well as this was a private school that I attended - and a large one, too, even by Houston's standards! That achievement, which bolstered my drive to continue taking photographs . It also made my Dad beam and never complain about buying me better equipment, films to play with, or paying to get film developed until I was ready to start playing with developing my own film in my own darkroom . . . which he encouraged, helped build, guided me through the process the first few times I did it, and offered me tons of advice along the way.

 

By the time I entered sixth grade, if you saw me without a camera around my neck or balanced precariously above a pile of textbooks and notebooks, it was rare and meant that I'd probably be in a foul mood, either having a camera in for repair and forgotten a back-up (by that time I had a small collection going!) or that I'd simply been in such a rush to get out the door that morning so as not to miss the bus that I'd left it behind accidentally.

 

While being artistic - and not just limiting that to my ability to point, click, and capture images on film - I had three other forms of escapism and expression that I regularly delved into from (with all but the last) into from fourth grade on up: music (I play 'cello and bass - upright and electric), acting (which I haven't done any of, at least in any serious form, since leaving high school), and writing. These days you can add to that dance - with and without fire, as is primarily what you'll see captured in my Flickr collection (at least until I upgrade to Pro!). While I've mostly dropped my other "typical" fine arts activities, like painting, sculpture, and drawing, I still engage in them from time to time. It's just rare.

 

I haven't seriously written anything creative - other than a few cheesy (or what I consider cheesy) pieces that I've posted to Global Conscious (a great site, if you've never been) - since I left my last relationship, which was to an extremely abusive, drug addicted person who thought he could "get to me" by burning all my books and journals - everything I'd written to that point since fourth or fifth grade . . . A huge part of me died as I watched that huge mass of work become ash from the roaring bonfire it started out as. I haven't really recovered fully from that since. Call it a mental block. Call it something I need to bring up with a therapist - and I probably do. Call it whatever you may, but it seems that in that fire not only did my words, feelings, and all else was destroyed externally and internally at the same time.

 

I left him soon after. Very. But that's another story for another day. But, most importantly, he didn't get - and, thus, didn't destroy the one camera I possessed at the time. In many ways I credit that little thing to saving me from an all-out, honest-to-goodness nervous breakdown.

 

Now that I've given you my artistic history (if in brief as there's a ton more I could add, but won't bore you with it unless you ask), let's move on to other things!

 

My interests are as varied as my moods. And being Bipolar I, that's saying something! On a related note, I'm a site Administrator on The Bipolar World Cafe, which if you enter the search term into a Google search, it comes up as the first non-advertising link on the page. If you're Bipolar, have a related disorder, care for someone who is mentally ill, are married or a close friend to someone who is, are a mental health provider, or are simply curious and want to educate yourself on Bipolar Disorder - which is OFTEN misunderstood as public education on the disease has not been the best and more media-guided (OMG! Brittney Spears IS BIPOLAR!!! Which, no, she's not. She's a spoiled brat with issues, yes, but we all have issues. She, if she is mentally ill, more likely has Borderline Personality Disorder and a concurrent drug issue),

 

I'm a research junkie and always - trying - to keep up with the latest scientific, medical, and technological studies and advances as well as with legal precedents. I know that's a strange one to have, the interest in legal precedents, but that's just part of who I am.

 

I'm also in BDSM. I'm mostly a sub, but sometimes I feel domme-ish . . . although I don't know or think it's really enough to classify me as a true switch. I love to dress up in sexy things and . . . well, I'll leave that to your imagination! :D Let's just say that it's good, clean, dirty fun.

 

I used to be highly involved in the Burning Man scene, both locally in Austin and nationally, at the official festival in the Black Rock Desert close to Gerlach, Washoe County, Nevada. Those days were fun but too chaotic for me, so I eventually said goodbye and closed the door on that chapter of my life and moved on. As it's very common knowledge that drug and alcohol use/addiction are issues in that community, since officially leaving that community just over five years ago, I've maintained my sobriety. Don't get me wrong! I had fun - most of the time. It's just that when it becomes work to keep it up that the fun, "daring", and mysteriously seductive and sexy perceived edge you see for the shambles of a drudgery it is, that the dangers are very real, and it loses its glamor. I'm glad I left and quit when I did or things could have been A LOT worse.

 

Okay, so maybe describing myself while half-asleep (which makes me ramble when I write, as you can tell!) wasn't the best of ideas, Eh.

 

If there's anything you're curious about or want to ask me, just ask. There's very little I won't answer, and if you do so happen to stumble upon one of them, I'll let you know.

 

Cheers!

 

(ephemeral)