My Website: www.breefram.com

My Podcast: www.forgedinfire.org

Feb 2021 - Since the last update I've transitioned twice. Once from male to female and the second from the Air Force to the Space Force. I'm excited to be moving back into an era of increased opportunity for transgender people in the military and an end to the pandemic.

Dec 2018 - Earlier this year we moved to Central NY for my first command position and it's been quite an adventure. We love our little house and the work my folks are doing is fantastic. However living in a semi-rural area without a sizable LGBT community has its challenges. My oldest is now a hockey player and hockey is life around here. I'm often on the road (in the air) and it's fun to catch up with folks when I am. Here's to a great 2019!

July 2017 - (Fight's on!)

For the most recent news it's best to follow me on Facebook (www.facebook.com/bree.fram/) as we deal with the fallout from Trump's tweets and directives to reinstate the ban on transgender service in the military.

Our country has a checkered past when it comes to civil rights, but I can't think of any instance where, at the federal level, we have gone backwards and reinstated institutional discrimination once it had been eliminated. In the long term we have bent the moral arc towards justice, and it would be shameful for our nation to reverse course on the ideal of liberty and justice for all.

Many people have asked what they can do now and if we move from tweet to policy. First, thank you! I believe the best things you can do are to speak out about your feelings on the issue, share the stories of honorably serving transgender service members, donate to organizations that support us, and to contact your representatives regarding your support of open trans service.

I remain optimistic and hope you do too. The response to me personally and across the country has been amazing. I'm so thankful.

June 2017 (One Year after coming out)

To say a lot has happened in the past year, personally, professionally, and in world events, would be a massive understatement.

Though I was optimistic, coming out and sharing this post was one of the most challenging things I've done. I'm not sure how long my cursor hovered over the little button that says 'Post' but it felt like an eternity. As soon as I hit it, I rushed off to the gym where I probably ran faster than I have in my life to try and burn off the nervous energy. The response when I got back blew me away...

To my AF family: Thank you. Your response was incredible. Having the office come over one by one and shake my hand saying that it was an honor to serve with me was beyond touching. However, you had it backwards... it's my honor to serve with all of you. Being able to share my AF story along with my personal story has been deeply meaningful.

To all my friends and family: Thank you. I could not have found myself among a more wonderful group of people. You all exceeded, by far, the optimism I had in coming out. I am lucky beyond compare to have received the reaction I did: no negative words and lots of love. So many people lose friends and family over LGBT issues, not me. Going above and beyond, you've shown me in deeds (and words) the respect and support that everyone should have in their lives. Thank you.

To Peg: It's been hard. It will be hard. The challenges aren't over. The fact that I get to tackle them with you is everything. Thank you for being at my side and my biggest supporter... even when you want to kill me.

As you can see, I changed my name here to better reflect my whole self. I'll respond to either name and either set of pronouns, though if we're together in person I prefer the name and pronouns associated with my presentation. Visibility remains critical to acceptance, advocacy, and education and I definitely will be out there.

Again, thank you all for being part of my life. I look forward to creating more great memories with all of you!

Jul 2016

The Ban Is Over - My Story

On June 30th 2016, DoD officially ended its ban on transgender service. In the week prior I had come out to my family, my current and former commanders, and close friends about being trans. No more hiding. On the day the ban fell I publicly posted this to Facebook.

This is a long, but very important post, please do me a favor and read it all.

I want to share something with all of you: I’m transgender.

I’ve known I was trans since an early age though I struggled to find the courage to admit what it meant to me and how I could, and would, express myself. I consider myself gender-fluid, though the term bi-gender is also fitting. I could be happy living as a man, or happy living as a woman, but I don’t think either is the full-time answer for me. I know that I’m happiest and most fulfilled as a human when I get to express all aspects of who I am. It also means that I don’t have plans to transition medically or to present any differently at work but that I no longer have any reason to hide who I am. Being Bryan has never felt wrong to me, and Bryan will never go away, it’s just not all of who I am.

So why bring this into the open now? (Or ever?) With all the recent news regarding bathroom bills, the shooting at Pulse in Orlando, and today’s just announced removal of the ban on being trans in the military there’s really no better time. As SecDef just said "Our military and our nation will be stronger" with this change. I’ve done several outreach events and some advocacy work with SPART*A, a group of active duty transgender servicemembers, for the past two years but I can have a lot more impact if my story is public. I want to be in a position to help others and visibility is ridiculously important. If my story can sway a few people from neutral to supportive on transgender rights, or educate some folks who never had a reason to be involved or informed, I’d consider coming out to be a great success.

Peg and I want to raise the kids to be open, honest, and tolerant. They’ve known about me for a while as we felt it best not to lie or hide things from them that they would learn about eventually. We want to avoid any perceived hypocrisy between how we ask them to behave and how we behave. There will no longer be a need for worrying about who might know, or what can be said (or what the kids say!). None of this has been easy on Peg, and it probably never will be. Dealing with me being trans has probably been even more of a challenge for her than it has for me even though she’s known since shortly after we started dating. She’s been beyond amazing, even though it’s been a total roller-coaster and there were some very difficult times.

I have received an amazing amount of support recently from my extended family and I really couldn’t ask for more. Peg and I have many friends in the LGBT community that have been wonderful as well. I also have support and allies at work and am reaching out to offer my help as another channel for officers dealing with someone coming out in their organizations to speak with.

Day-to-day, this doesn’t really change much in how I live my life. However, it frees Peg and me to be more open and effective champions of issues that affect us and our many friends. Being an advocate within the community only goes so far. Perhaps I’m the first transgender person you know. If so, great! Either way, I’m more than happy to answer any questions about my situation, the advocacy work I’ve done, or anything else. I’d also gladly share resources for good information on transgender issues. Feel free to call, message, e-mail, comment or get in touch with me in any manner to ask questions.

Thank you all for your friendship over the years. I am truly lucky to have all of you. We are friends here for a reason and I sincerely hope that reason hasn’t changed because I enjoy having you all in my life. I look forward to continuing to share the joy in my life with all of you.

Above all, I remain a happy and committed husband, father, son, brother, and Airman. I’m proud of all those roles; I just happen to be a bit more.

#opentransservice #airforce #missionready #servingproud

Just like others, I'm not a predator, a pervert or a lesser human because I'm transgender. I'm still a devoted spouse, loving parent, and a patriotic American Airman willing to defend your freedom and your right to think of me any way you want. Many of the estimated 700,000+ transgender Americans live in situations far more precarious than mine and 41% of them have attempted suicide at least once, almost ten times the national average. These individuals are vastly more likely to be on the receiving end of assault, in many cases sexual assault, insted of the perpetrators as recent legislation has tried to convince the public.

Almost 90% of Americans know someone who is lesbian, gay, or bisexual, but only around 15% of Americans know someone who is trans. This leads to things like the recent spate of anti-trans bathroom bills, continued discrimination in education, housing, and employment, and sadly, the abandonment, suicide, or murder of far too many transgender individuals. This has to stop. The best way to bring that about is to share our stories while making friends and allies.

My sincere hope is now that you know a transgender person, if you didn't already, that you might be willing to help the trans folks in your community or that you meet. Maybe this helps you realize that we could be anyone and appearance alone doesn't tell the whole story. Please speak out when discrimination or harassment is occurring instead of keeping quiet, write a school-board or other elected officials to help keep some of our most vulnerable kids safe, or lend a hand to someone in need. You never know whose child, sibling, parent or friend is on the other side being harassed, marginalized, or threatened.

Treat everyone with a dose of kindness.

Fall 2015

Life moves fast! The roller-coaster has had it's ups and downs in relation to my wife and my gender expression, but overall we're in a pretty good place. At this point I've taken to the term gender-fluid to describe myself as I think that more accurately portrays me. We've moved across the country to the East Coast and look forward to exploring the DC area and a bit further afield over the next few years.

July 2014

I've left Denver in the rear-view mirror and it was incredibly hard to go. I'll treasure all the friends and wonderful experiences I had there. But, I'm still having tons of fun and am getting settled into the D.C. area.

March 19th 2013

Just about a year on Flickr and what an amazing year its been! Over a quarter of a million views here which is very flattering. Even better are the amazing things my wife has done for (and with) me this year, the adventures I've had, and all the amazing people that have come into my life as a result of venturing out in the real world. I don't know how it could possibly be topped, but I can only hope that this year is just as incredible. I'm truly lucky and blessed!

December 14th 2012

One day after LASIK and I'm recovering nicely with better than 20/20 vision. If you were a fan I'm sorry there won't be any more glasses photos. :)

Update November 17th 2012

I just got back from an amazing trip to the UK where Bree got to get out three times. Tons of pics are up and you can read a good description of the trip in the comments on the Harrogate, Knaresborough, and London sets. Enjoy.

Update - October 15th 2012

I've been out three times with my wife and couldn't be more amazed with how incredible she's been. It was a major struggle for her to get to this point and the love she's shown me in getting here is incredible. We've been out to dinner twice and she took me to a salon to get a new wig that she could better deal with. I'm all smiles!

March 2012

Hi All,

I'm happily married with one kid and another on the way. I'm also just beginning to venture out into the world as a crossdresser. I've dressed up to one degree or another since I was around 10 years old, but didn't really try to finish the look until I turned 30. It took another two years to build up the courage (and the makeup skills) to venture out in the world. I'm still working on both (courage and makeup) but am looking forward to starting to meet others and have more adventures out and about.

My wife is supportive up to a point, but just can't get over the wig right now. So since she just can't cross the threshold and go out with me, she very recently suggested I reach out to others that would give me options to explore my hobby with others that shared it. I adore her for her support, willingness to try, and everything else.

I look forward to meeting, sharing, and learning with all of you out there.

-Bree