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Imagine the talent of Jason Donovan in Sam Gamgee's body - THIS IS THE ANDY GRANGE SHOW.
Andy Grange is Bradford's answer to Bruce Lee except that he's as soft as a particularly runny shite and not dead.
Grange and I invented the Scottish, but they got out of the test tube. Now he lives as a man of terrible and mysterious power in a cave just west of Milton Keynes. He eats things and sand, all the time.
Andy is a good person. Ipso Facto
This man has excellent taste in t-shirts.
If Badger and gorillas joined forces, they would be the United King Kong of Great Britain.
I have no idea why his name is Badger but I have never once referred to him as Andy.
I've met BM a couple of times now, maybe a dozen, i don't know, i'm not that good with faces, but i can say with some confidence that he seems like a bloody nice 'bloke'. If a bit odd at times.
Whenever I meet Badger Mushroom, within a few days it starts to rain. Coincidence? I think not.
I've known Badger Mushroom for 10 years now. Our paths first crossed when I was working in the Rotherham branch of Toys 'R' Us. I was innocently rearranging the life size figurine display when a young man approached me and insisted I manually pleasure one of the charactors for his own gratification. I gladly obliged. … Read more
I've known Badger Mushroom for 10 years now. Our paths first crossed when I was working in the Rotherham branch of Toys 'R' Us. I was innocently rearranging the life size figurine display when a young man approached me and insisted I manually pleasure one of the charactors for his own gratification. I gladly obliged. Since this time we have spent many fine hours touring the east side of Keighley selling shoes to tramps. All was going well until the spineless sap was woooooed by the bright lights and deadbeats of Northampton. The last I heard of him he was working as a fridge magnet installer and hanging round with some bird called 'Berkatonic'. I don't know much about her but I do know she has a yacht.
Read lessBadger possesses a hypnotising quality that I have never before seen in a man. It can only be described as Chimp Magnetism.
Few men can manipulate Kenneth Williams the way that Badger can. For that, I admire him.
For as long as i've him, Badger Mushroom has had nothing to do with either badgers or mushrooms. The man is a cypher told as a riddle wrapped in an enigma.
What a fab guy, he's got lots of skills
Up north they have a special name for Badger Mushroom. I think it's something like 'Andy'.
I feel slightly schizpophrenic about Badger. On the one hand he's chamring, smooth, witty and so on, and on the other he's ill-mannered, uncultured and has the most extraordinary diet. He did once draw a cock on my dining table though. And for that I salute him.