Its like falling softly into a pool of crytal mountain water. Floating on your back circular beneath vibrant sky, Deciphering codes in the clouds spinning, dizzy, fast. Going clear out of your head, lunatic mad. Throwing yourself infront of a runaway train insane. Hallucinating bloody skeletons and black helicopters behind you. Its crazy. Jumping into your own brain, ferreting whats inside. Accepting past failures, freeing self destructive demons. Forgiving yourself and those you love and even those you despise. Tender. Blossoming.passionate.intense… insane..came right in, filled me up. With love so perfect to pick me up, carry me to bed. The most incredible place id ever been was right inside me. Some drank alcohol, the wise drank water. It tasted as good as champagne. Our dance was sensual, sexual… I realize later it was anything but innocent.

Shh. You don’t have to believe in hope or humanity. I may be burned, but shining stars hang low. Showing my name, in lights, so bright. I’ve reached my height. Euphoria, seen lows so low, always struggling on my toes. Remembering the nights we would glow. But the aliens said it was time to go HOME. Looking for you along horizons, maybe that’s why it took so long. I’ll ask myself, who’s broken rulz? But I stand looking like a fool. Don’t trust the watchful eyes, full of deceitful lies. A shot of love and full of dreams. I’m weakened by the sound of pleas. Freedom cry. May freedom reign. I can’t speak, so what the fuck. I’m so shit out of luck. Im a worthless, lovestruck lunatic. Calling to my love, ecstatic. My monsters played me before, but not like this. this darkness holds many tricks. I hate it but it draws me in, lurching underneath his skin. Sinking, sinking. No breath, for now. Its me who knows how to unleash the truth and beauty within. Forget about these four walls, closed eyes, flying in bluest skies. Forget all these people. No more people. When my eyes are closed I can see more than you’d believe. These shades make me hallucinate, falling back, constantly. I can’t catch up. Wait. Please wait.

If it means anything, for you I will

Wait alongside burning hills

Me eyes tell lies, you wont come home

But butterflies will dance, lsd enhanced. Moving beautifully like you and me.

Close your eyes and smile for a while, the wind kisses you so gently. You are weak, reaching your peak. Don’t trust the lies, find the divine. Question authority, you have the right to make noise. Don’t shut up, I need to hear, why you’ve always stayed so dear.

‘’as I sit in this hospital, DAY4; awaiting a truth, my freedom. is not even mine, its yours to take. My individuality, I could defend to the end, but now I am being told to CHANGE. Even though im scared, terrified. You wont ever understand. They say im sick, damaged. I can’t believe them, but how will I achieve freedom.. I am strong, but they are stronger. I am alone. No more fresh air.

Burning up, coming down, I popped three aspirin against the throbbing in my skull. Tumbling through space, tugged by gravity towards certain doom. Anyone could have came along, a rapist, a serial killer.. lucky me, I drew a cop. Out of sight, out of my mind. Need more to get through the day, needed more just to feel okay. Part of your brain insists your dead, another part says.. its better there; in the dark. Somewhere you hear voices, urgent. Will you reach heaven.. brighter now, white and beautiful. Your eyes flutter, and open to discover; your back in hell after all. Euphoria may have mistaken me for someone else and drained all my vitals, leaving me to die on the streets of this bare city.

I knew the devil long before god. Yes I have hope, but im insanely flawed. I remember a place, I once called home. But to this day I’m left alone. Euphoria will keep my mind right, encouraging me to put up a fight. Colours spinning, make you swirl. Once labeled a good girl?? Now who am i? I am the one following the white rabbit. In search of some new bad habits. I don’t want to relapse, cant bare boredom. What else can show me to a beautiful gold throne.

Ways of your taste are being forced down my throat, I knew that man in the heavy trench coat. Inspiring the kids to look the other way, in search of love, on hot summer days. I need something to hush these demons shrieking inside my head.

Leprechauns in case you didn’t know… are cute little demons, with churibic faces and devil born souls. When they smile, you’d better run quick. Im awake, and I cant stop concentrating on these crazy fairies flying around me. Sleep deprived brain sizzling on yet another toke. My thought processes are fucked, I am not a worthy opponent. I never wanted to surrender to luscious insanity, but it was too tempting.