Ummm... I'm 16, I live in England...

I'm completely insane...

my contortion vid on youtube:

uk.youtube.com/watch?v=x20wbF2V2h0

I am polyphobic [see below the 2nd line]

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I'm a bit flexible.

actually 'a bit' is an understatement as:

 

i can turn my head to almost 180 degrees

i can turn my torso to almost 180 degrees in relation to my lower body

i can turn my arm/hand 360 degrees

 

Dislocations:

i can dislocate my shoulders

i can dislocate my arms (this is different from shoulders)

i can dislocate my ankle

i can dislocate my digits

 

'Bending':

i can bend my elbow the wrong way and lick my

elbow

i can bend my legs backwards (slightly)

i can almost bend over forwards enough to kiss my but goodbye

i can (just) bend my back to past 90 degrees

 

Misc:

i can get into the human knot

I can fold myself up

i can elongate my body by spacing out the ribs

i can get my leg behind my head

i can lift up my ribcage, drop my abdomen to reveal my heart faintly beating through the skin of my middle-torso

i can invert my ribcage

i can force my stomach out to make myself look pregnant

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Beware, I fear, I fear a lot

I make a list of those,

That you know not,

I fear these things,

So very much,

I shall begin now, here goes..

 

I fear Public Toilets,

Never used one in my life.

 

I fear standing behind shower curtains,

In-case on the other side creeps a madman with his knife.

 

I fear Closets and things that could be under my bed,

Corners, Behind doors and Behind objects in general,

I fear a murderer on the other side who wishes me dead.

 

I fear being under objects,

Especially beds, tables, desks, and the like,

 

I fear being near, in, or around tall buildings,

Being in a lit room when outside it is night,

 

I dread Garages, Attics, Basements,

Can't stand the thought of creeping insects,

or being stalked, it makes me demented.

 

Being infested with intestinal worms, suffocated, buried alive,

These all scare me regularly, but there's one thing i do not fear,

I don't fear death, instead of facing these fears i would rather die.

 

I can't eat food that others have touched,

And i believe i'm being hunted,

By Spirits, Ghosts, and Demons

 

Deep water, Big fish, Fish in water,

And worst of them all:

The possibility that there might be a fish in the water

 

The kind of darkness that you don't know what's in it,

Silence in which I might hear something coming to kill me,

 

Crossing the street, Meeting people, Guns and bullets,

and also the fear that

Small creatures could be under, near, around, or behind things where they could grab my foot.

 

Inanimate objects attacking me,

Having things in my hair,

Ants crawling on me,

 

My nails being ripped off or people with no nails,

Touching other peoples spit,

Being covered by many snails.

 

My cup being contaminated,

Something living in my bathroom,

Things crawling on the ceiling,

 

..umm.. I think that's lt...

A lie, i know, I know there's more, its miraculous that i'm not forever curled up in a tiny ball rocking back and forth on my bed o.O

 

okay.. done now.. and those window things on the sides of the house, whatever they're called, and drowning, people standing behind me, going blind, being attacked by someone, that really freakish screaming/howling/other scary noise coming from my window right now O.O AHH!!!!, and werewolves.. okay.. yes.. I'm done now before that scary noise gets any closer *runs away*

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