Know this!

I am the rightful holder of the hereditary title, Earl of Longwood. Nevertheless, since dear old pater got my scullery maid of a mother "up the pole" (in the parlance of our times) without benefit of clergy, I am reduced to the status of a common tinker!

My solicitors are tirelessly pressing my suit. And until that glorious day when the Young Pretender has been forced to quit his claim on my estates, I must subsist solely on my wits and the largesse of sympathetic women. Providence has blessed me with no lack of either; nil desperandum.

Adieu, mes cyber-amis! Take courage, and never forget the LeField family motto: Mandere non decipere est!