Endless Highway
My journey started going on sixty years ago when I tried on my aunt's stockings. Although back then I never thought of it as a journey, never wanted to go anywhere, it was just something that gave me immense pleasure. But after a few years I got fed up of the sight reflected in the bathroom mirror of a guy in stockings and lingerie. I wanted to look like someone who should be wearing them. That eventually led to the creation of Ursula, fully dressed with wig and makeup.
My thoughts on this subject are very much influenced by an article I read many years ago in the excellent American magazine "Tapestry". The author of the article pictured us on a line rather than the spectrum that seems to be very popular these days. The exact analogy she used was a railway line with us traveling along it on a train. Departure point is trying on a single item of female attire, such as your sister's panties, terminus is full medical transition and living full time as a woman.
However the train we travel in along that line should not be an express train but one that stops at every station. Departing from trying on one item of female attire once progressing through wearing it regularly, to full lingerie, to outerwear, to wig and makeup, to false breasts, to limited surgery such as breast implants etc all the way to full transition. The idea is to get off the train at every station and spend some time there. Once you reach somewhere you are comfortable, do not get back on the train.
I may be wrong but I get the distinct impression that most of the gurls on Flickr got off with me at the stage where we want to pass as fully as possible without surgery or hormones.
My profile mentions how I went out dressed a lot in my twenties and thirties but then ended up back in the closet for many years, only dressing occasionally at home and then only in lingerie, but now having retired with time on my hands wanting to spend more of that time as Ursula.
So I wanted to get back to where I was before. To go back to the station where I got off the train if you will. With the help of dressing services and the support of people online, especially here and SHQ, I did that.
But then something interesting and unexpected happened. I found that I wanted to get back on the train. Before I was content to dress at support groups, gay venues, TV/TS conferences and fetish events. In other words trans friendly places. Or safe spaces to use the modern jargon. Now I want to take Ursula out into the world at large. Not to shout "look at me, I'm trans" but to blend in unnoticed as far as possible. I've found that it is possible although I know I'll never pass.
Despite that knowledge it is still something I strive towards. So maybe my journey has a few miles still to run.
Endless Highway
My journey started going on sixty years ago when I tried on my aunt's stockings. Although back then I never thought of it as a journey, never wanted to go anywhere, it was just something that gave me immense pleasure. But after a few years I got fed up of the sight reflected in the bathroom mirror of a guy in stockings and lingerie. I wanted to look like someone who should be wearing them. That eventually led to the creation of Ursula, fully dressed with wig and makeup.
My thoughts on this subject are very much influenced by an article I read many years ago in the excellent American magazine "Tapestry". The author of the article pictured us on a line rather than the spectrum that seems to be very popular these days. The exact analogy she used was a railway line with us traveling along it on a train. Departure point is trying on a single item of female attire, such as your sister's panties, terminus is full medical transition and living full time as a woman.
However the train we travel in along that line should not be an express train but one that stops at every station. Departing from trying on one item of female attire once progressing through wearing it regularly, to full lingerie, to outerwear, to wig and makeup, to false breasts, to limited surgery such as breast implants etc all the way to full transition. The idea is to get off the train at every station and spend some time there. Once you reach somewhere you are comfortable, do not get back on the train.
I may be wrong but I get the distinct impression that most of the gurls on Flickr got off with me at the stage where we want to pass as fully as possible without surgery or hormones.
My profile mentions how I went out dressed a lot in my twenties and thirties but then ended up back in the closet for many years, only dressing occasionally at home and then only in lingerie, but now having retired with time on my hands wanting to spend more of that time as Ursula.
So I wanted to get back to where I was before. To go back to the station where I got off the train if you will. With the help of dressing services and the support of people online, especially here and SHQ, I did that.
But then something interesting and unexpected happened. I found that I wanted to get back on the train. Before I was content to dress at support groups, gay venues, TV/TS conferences and fetish events. In other words trans friendly places. Or safe spaces to use the modern jargon. Now I want to take Ursula out into the world at large. Not to shout "look at me, I'm trans" but to blend in unnoticed as far as possible. I've found that it is possible although I know I'll never pass.
Despite that knowledge it is still something I strive towards. So maybe my journey has a few miles still to run.