esther.linoff
Spooky *ooky* Halloween :P
:-:
A few of the jokes are "bat". Some might even say they are "scary".
So enjoy, bite and have fun;-))
Q. What's a monster's favorite bean?
A. A human bean.
Q. Why can't the boy ghost have babies?
A. Because he has a Hallo-weenie.
Q. What do you call a witch who lives at the beach?
A. A sand-witch.
Q. What did the skeleton say to the vampire?
A. You suck.
Q. Why was the girl afraid of the vampire?
A. He was all bite and no bark.
Q. Why did the game warden arrest the ghost?
A. He didn't have a haunting license.
Q. Why didn't the skeleton dance at the party?
A. He had no body to dance with.
Q. Where does Count Dracula usually eat his lunch?
A. At the casketeria.
Q. What happens when a ghost gets lost in the fog?
A. He is mist.
Q. Why did the Vampire read the Wall Street Journal?
Q. He heard it had great circulation.
Q. What tops off a ghost's ice cream sundae?
A. Whipped scream.
Q. What do you give a skeleton for valentine's day?
A. Bone-bones in a heart shaped box.
Q. What are ghosts' favorite kind of streets?
A. Dead ends
Q. What is a vampires favorite holiday?
A. Fangsgiving
Q. What kind of makeup do ghosts wear?
A. Mas-scare-a.
Q. Why did the skeleton cross the road?
A. To go to the body shop.
Q. What happens when two vampires meet?
A. It was love at first bite!
Q. Who was the most famous ghost detective?
A. Sherlock Moans or Warlock Holmes or Sherlock Bones.
Q. What do you call two spiders that just got married?
A. Newlywebbed
Q. What did the ghost say to the man at the coffee shop?
A. Scream or sugar!
Q. Who was the most famous French skeleton?
A. Napoleon bone-apart
Q. Which building does Dracula visit in New York?
A. The Vampire State Building.
Q. Where do most werewolves live?
A. In howllywood, California
Q. Where does a ghost refuel his porche?
A. At a ghastly station.
Q. What do Italian's eat on Halloween?
A. Fettucinni Afraid-o (Ha ha ha)
Q. Why did the skeleton go disco dancing?
A. to see the boogy man.
Q. What do witches use in their hair?
A. scare-spray
Q. What do you call a little monsters parents
A. mummy and deady
Q. What do you get when you cross a vampire with the internet?
A. blood-thirsty hacker baby
Q. What instrument do skeleton play?
A: Trom-BONE.
Q. What do ghosts eat for breakfast?
A. Boo-Berries.
Q: Why did't the skeleton cross the road?
A: He had no guts.
Q. Why do vampires scare people?
A. They are bored to death!
Q. What's it like to be kissed by a vampire?
A. It's a pain in the neck.
Q. What songs does Dracula hate?
A. "You Are My Sunshine" and "Sunshine on my Shoulders.
Q. How does a girl vampire flirt?
A. She bats her eyes.
Q. What is a vampires least favorite food?
A.Steak
Q. What's it called when a vampire has trouble with his house?
A. A grave problem.
Q. Why doesn't anybody like Dracula?
A. He has a bat temper.
Q. Why did Dracula go to the dentist?
A. He had a fang-ache.
Q. Why are vampires like false teeth?
A. They all come out at night.
Q. Who does Dracula get letters from?
A. His fang club.
Q. What kind of key does a skeleton use?
A. A skeleton key.
Q. What kind of gum do ghosts chew?
A. Boo Boo Gum.
Q. What is a ghosts favorite sale?
A. A white sale.
Q. What's a ghosts favorite desert?
A. Boo-berry pie.
Q. What's a monsters favorite desert?
A. I-Scream!!
Q. Why do girl ghosts go on diets?
A. So they can keep their ghoulish figures.
Q. When does a ghost have breakfast?
A. In the moaning.
Q. What do ghosts drink at breakfast?
A. Coffee with scream and sugar.
Q. Where does a ghost go on vacation?
A. Mali-boo.
Q. Where did the ghost get it's hair done?
A: At the boo-ty shop.
Q. What do they teach in witching school?
A. Spelling.
Q. Why does a witch ride a broom?
A. Vacuum cleaners get stuck at the end of the cord.
Q. What do you call a witch's garage?
A. A broom closet.
Q. What do you call two witches living together?
A. Broommates.
Q. What did the mother ghost say to her kids in the car?
A. Fasten your sheet belts.
Q. What do you call a monster who poisons corn flakes?
A. A cereal killer.
Q. What did the bird say on Halloween?
A. Trick or tweet!
Q. Why do skeletons drink milk?
A. To help their bones!
Q. What did the teenage witch ask her mother on Haloween?
A. Can i have the keys to the broom tonight.
W. Why do ghosts like to ride elevators?
A.it raises their spirits.
Q. Why can't a Skeleton Lift Weights?
A. He's all bone & no muscle.
Q. What is a vamire's favorite fruit?
A: A necktarine
Q. What do the skeletons say be for eating?
A. Bone appetite
Q. What is Dracula's favorite restaraunt?
A. Murder King
Q: What did tha boy ghost say to the girl ghost?
A: You are the most booooooooo-tiful thing I have ever seen!
Q. What do you give to a pumpkin who is trying to quit smoking?
A. A pumpkin patch!!!
Q. Where do vampires keep their money?
A: The blood bank!!!
Q. Who are some of the were-wolves cousins?
A. The what-wolves and when-wolves.
Q. What did Dracula say after reading all these jokes?
A. They suck! (or they bite!)
:-:
Spooky *ooky* Halloween :P
:-:
A few of the jokes are "bat". Some might even say they are "scary".
So enjoy, bite and have fun;-))
Q. What's a monster's favorite bean?
A. A human bean.
Q. Why can't the boy ghost have babies?
A. Because he has a Hallo-weenie.
Q. What do you call a witch who lives at the beach?
A. A sand-witch.
Q. What did the skeleton say to the vampire?
A. You suck.
Q. Why was the girl afraid of the vampire?
A. He was all bite and no bark.
Q. Why did the game warden arrest the ghost?
A. He didn't have a haunting license.
Q. Why didn't the skeleton dance at the party?
A. He had no body to dance with.
Q. Where does Count Dracula usually eat his lunch?
A. At the casketeria.
Q. What happens when a ghost gets lost in the fog?
A. He is mist.
Q. Why did the Vampire read the Wall Street Journal?
Q. He heard it had great circulation.
Q. What tops off a ghost's ice cream sundae?
A. Whipped scream.
Q. What do you give a skeleton for valentine's day?
A. Bone-bones in a heart shaped box.
Q. What are ghosts' favorite kind of streets?
A. Dead ends
Q. What is a vampires favorite holiday?
A. Fangsgiving
Q. What kind of makeup do ghosts wear?
A. Mas-scare-a.
Q. Why did the skeleton cross the road?
A. To go to the body shop.
Q. What happens when two vampires meet?
A. It was love at first bite!
Q. Who was the most famous ghost detective?
A. Sherlock Moans or Warlock Holmes or Sherlock Bones.
Q. What do you call two spiders that just got married?
A. Newlywebbed
Q. What did the ghost say to the man at the coffee shop?
A. Scream or sugar!
Q. Who was the most famous French skeleton?
A. Napoleon bone-apart
Q. Which building does Dracula visit in New York?
A. The Vampire State Building.
Q. Where do most werewolves live?
A. In howllywood, California
Q. Where does a ghost refuel his porche?
A. At a ghastly station.
Q. What do Italian's eat on Halloween?
A. Fettucinni Afraid-o (Ha ha ha)
Q. Why did the skeleton go disco dancing?
A. to see the boogy man.
Q. What do witches use in their hair?
A. scare-spray
Q. What do you call a little monsters parents
A. mummy and deady
Q. What do you get when you cross a vampire with the internet?
A. blood-thirsty hacker baby
Q. What instrument do skeleton play?
A: Trom-BONE.
Q. What do ghosts eat for breakfast?
A. Boo-Berries.
Q: Why did't the skeleton cross the road?
A: He had no guts.
Q. Why do vampires scare people?
A. They are bored to death!
Q. What's it like to be kissed by a vampire?
A. It's a pain in the neck.
Q. What songs does Dracula hate?
A. "You Are My Sunshine" and "Sunshine on my Shoulders.
Q. How does a girl vampire flirt?
A. She bats her eyes.
Q. What is a vampires least favorite food?
A.Steak
Q. What's it called when a vampire has trouble with his house?
A. A grave problem.
Q. Why doesn't anybody like Dracula?
A. He has a bat temper.
Q. Why did Dracula go to the dentist?
A. He had a fang-ache.
Q. Why are vampires like false teeth?
A. They all come out at night.
Q. Who does Dracula get letters from?
A. His fang club.
Q. What kind of key does a skeleton use?
A. A skeleton key.
Q. What kind of gum do ghosts chew?
A. Boo Boo Gum.
Q. What is a ghosts favorite sale?
A. A white sale.
Q. What's a ghosts favorite desert?
A. Boo-berry pie.
Q. What's a monsters favorite desert?
A. I-Scream!!
Q. Why do girl ghosts go on diets?
A. So they can keep their ghoulish figures.
Q. When does a ghost have breakfast?
A. In the moaning.
Q. What do ghosts drink at breakfast?
A. Coffee with scream and sugar.
Q. Where does a ghost go on vacation?
A. Mali-boo.
Q. Where did the ghost get it's hair done?
A: At the boo-ty shop.
Q. What do they teach in witching school?
A. Spelling.
Q. Why does a witch ride a broom?
A. Vacuum cleaners get stuck at the end of the cord.
Q. What do you call a witch's garage?
A. A broom closet.
Q. What do you call two witches living together?
A. Broommates.
Q. What did the mother ghost say to her kids in the car?
A. Fasten your sheet belts.
Q. What do you call a monster who poisons corn flakes?
A. A cereal killer.
Q. What did the bird say on Halloween?
A. Trick or tweet!
Q. Why do skeletons drink milk?
A. To help their bones!
Q. What did the teenage witch ask her mother on Haloween?
A. Can i have the keys to the broom tonight.
W. Why do ghosts like to ride elevators?
A.it raises their spirits.
Q. Why can't a Skeleton Lift Weights?
A. He's all bone & no muscle.
Q. What is a vamire's favorite fruit?
A: A necktarine
Q. What do the skeletons say be for eating?
A. Bone appetite
Q. What is Dracula's favorite restaraunt?
A. Murder King
Q: What did tha boy ghost say to the girl ghost?
A: You are the most booooooooo-tiful thing I have ever seen!
Q. What do you give to a pumpkin who is trying to quit smoking?
A. A pumpkin patch!!!
Q. Where do vampires keep their money?
A: The blood bank!!!
Q. Who are some of the were-wolves cousins?
A. The what-wolves and when-wolves.
Q. What did Dracula say after reading all these jokes?
A. They suck! (or they bite!)
:-: