"Close Encounter"

CLOSE ENCOUNTER

(you can sing this)

 

So friendly and forthright--

Speaks her mind with no fear.

Refreshingly honest--

Glad I did lend an ear.

 

Her youth was deprived,

Yet she struggled through life.

Thoughts ran through my mind--

Might this be a perfect wife?

 

I would love and adore her,

Keep her safe from all harm.

Yet something deep inside me

Did sound an alarm.

 

While I longed to hold her tightly,

Like I'd found a new-born pup--

I soon realized the problem:

She just wouldn't shut-up.

 

She wouldn't shut-up

She just wouldn't shut-up

If talking were like hockey,

She would win the Stanley Cup.

 

Her life story-- maybe interesting,

But more fit for a memoir,

Than someone trying to get lucky,

Getting drunk in a local bar.

 

On and on she would ramble,

Pretzel crumbs filled the air.

I searched for an excuse

To get out of my chair.

 

Finally, I managed an interruption--

So she' d focus on me,

As I made well-known motions

Of my need to go pee.

 

In the men's room, I huddled--

I'd absorbed way too much info.

The one recourse I had,

Was to climb out the window.

 

I ran down the street--

Afraid she'd discover me walking

While my ears took several days

To lose the sound of her talking.

 

Now a night seldom passes,

That I don't want her back,

Until my subconscious disgustedly taunts me:

"Yackity--yackity--yackity--yack!"

 

"Yackity--yackity--yackity--yack!"

"Yackity--yackity--yackity--yack!"

"Yackity--yackity--yackity--yack!"

No way could I handle that all night in the sack.

 

 

"Yackity--yackity--yackity--yack!"

"Yackity--yackity--yackity--yack!"

"Yackity--yackity--yackity--yack!"

If they made better ear plugs...

I still wouldn't want her back.

 

B. Kite -- 10/10/2023

 

Done