The stockings were hung:

'Twas the week before Christmas, when all through the house

Not a creature was stirring, not even a mouse;

The stockings were hung by the couch with care,

In hopes that Secret Santa soon would be there;

 

The children were nestled all snug in their beds,

While visions of Star Wars Angry Birds danced in their heads;

And mamma in her jeans, and I in my jacket,

Had just about left for a long afternoon of work,

 

When out on the lawn there arose such a clatter,

I sprang from the hallway to see what was the matter.

Away to the window I flew like a flash,

Tore open the curtains and threw open the door.

 

The sun on the breast of the grassy front lawn

Gave the lustre of mid-day to objects below,

When, what to my wondering eyes should appear,

But a UPS truck, and driver carrying a package with care,

 

With a little old driver, so lively and quick,

I knew in a moment it must be Secret Santa.

More rapid than eagles he came to my step,

And he whistled, and shouted, and called me by name;

 

"Now, ArcSyn! now, if this is your abode!

On, ArcSyn! this package I shall bestow!

To the top of the porch! to the front of the door!

Now dash away! dash away! dash away all!"

 

As dry leaves that before the wild hurricane fly,

When they meet with an obstacle, mount to the sky,

So up to the door step the driver flew,

With the box in hand, and signature pad too.

 

And then, in a twinkling, I had package in hand

The prancing and pawing of my hand.

As I drew in my head, and was turning around,

Down to the floor with Secret Santa package bound.

 

He was packed with care, from the top to the bottom,

And with packing peanuts, wrapped in bubble wrap;

A bundle of toys he had stuff in this box,

And it looked like a treasure just opening this pack.

 

My eyes -- how they twinkled! my dimples how merry!

My cheeks were like roses, my nose like a cherry!

My droll little mouth was drawn up like a bow,

And the beard of his chin was shaved clean you know;

 

The multitool knife I held tight in my teeth,

And the bubble wrap soon encircled my head like a wreath;

I had a broad face and a little round belly,

That shook, when I laughed like a bowlful of jelly.

 

I was ecstatic and pumped, as a right jolly old elf,

And I laughed when I saw it, in spite of myself;

A wink of my eye and a twist of my head,

Soon gave my wife to know she had nothing to dread;

 

I spoke many a word, but went straight to my work,

And tore open the package; then turned with a jerk,

And laying my finger aside of the game,

And giving a nod, a shout did arose;

 

I sprang to my car, to my wife gave a kiss,

And away I flew like the down of a thistle.

But I failed not to exclaim, ere I drove out of sight,

"Happy Christmas to all, and to all a good-night!"

 

Done