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All-Star Bugman - Departure

=Drury's House, Chuck and Chancer are babysitting=

 

Miranda- *On Phone* Remember, Axel's in bed by ten, Cammy's in by five. Axel gets a cookie OR ice cream. Cammy's moved onto formula milk, got that in the fridge.

 

Drury- -*cutting in* He starts crying put on Thomas and Friends- The classic series though, not that CGI crapfest. Kitten's sleeping over at a friends.

 

Miranda- Good luck. It's just a few days then we'll be back in Gotham

 

Chancer- Why can't I join this team of yours?

 

Miranda- Uh, I'll let Drury answer that

 

*Hands phone to Drury*

 

Chancer- Well?

 

Drury- Sorry, can't hear you, the plane's engine's too loud!

 

Chancer- The plane's engine? Doesn't it leave at 8:00?

 

Drury- So?

 

Chancer- It's 7:30

 

Drury- Well, they're testing the engines obviously

 

Chancer- But-

 

Drury- What? Breaking up! Bye bye!

 

*Hangs up*

 

Chancer- Do you think we embarrass them?

 

Chuck- What? pfft! Why do you say that?! He loves us! It's not like they'd have any reason to dislike you or anything!

 

Axel- You there, Glider-Guy, I want dessert

 

Chuck- Um. Cookie or ice cream?

 

Axel- Both!

 

Chancer- Sorry little man, it's one or the other

 

Axel- Fuck you dice man. Away and abort yourself!

 

Chuck- Hey, respect your elders, there's no need for- Arrgh! The motherfucker bit me!

 

Chancer- Let's have a look-see... Oh fuck, that's a lot of *faints*

 

Chuck- The pain! The pain!

 

Axel- I'll get my own food then? Dick heads.

 

==== On the plane=====

 

Miranda- Drury, I'm going to the toilet.

 

Drury- Ok babe see ya

 

Simon- Bye bye!

 

Drury- So, Gaige, I'm guessing Anatoli's locked up somewhere in a prison camp that we need to infiltrate eh?

 

Gaige- What? Don't be stupid. He was Russia's top assassin, a national hero, he's the head of security now.

 

Drury- You're shitting me

 

Gaige- Oh yeah. April Fucking Fools.

 

Drury- See, why do you always do this? I try to start a conversation and *Gets text message* Oh. I gotta go.

 

Gaige- Eh? Where are you-?

 

Drury- Simon, keep Grandpa Gaige company

 

Simon- Um. Ok.

 

*Drury exits. Several minutes pass*

 

Simon- Hi.

 

Gaige- Don't talk to me kid.

 

Simon- But Grandpa -

 

Gaige- No. Don't call me grandpa. Aside from it being stupid anyway, I'm not even related to you.

 

Simon- Oh. In that case...

 

*Simon plugs in his earphones. Gaige reads his paper. Simon starts speaking his film's dialogue aloud*

 

Gaige- Excuse me. Excuse me! Moron! Stop it!

 

Simon- S-sorry sir.

 

Gaige- That's better.

 

*Gets back to his paper. Simon taps him on the shoulder*

 

Simon- Do you think we'll meet Putin?

 

Gaige- I've already met him.

 

Simon- You have? What's he like?

 

Gaige- Russian.

 

Simon- Ohhhh.

 

*More minutes pass*

 

Simon- Mr Gaige?

 

Gaige- Mmmmm.

 

Simon- They've been in the toilet an awfully long time.

 

Gaige- Well, she's a women, who knows what- did you say 'they'?

 

Drury- Guess who joined the Mile High Club!

 

Miranda- Not so loud sweetie

 

Drury- Of course. Sorry.

 

Gaige- ... That's it. I'm holding my craps in 'till we land.

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Uploaded on June 13, 2018
Taken on June 13, 2018